SOCIETY | MENTAL HEALTH | PERSONALITY
Why You Should Stop Listening to the Nonsense People Say About Introverts
January 2 was World Introvert Day.
“Why are you so quiet?”
“Why do you talk so much?”
And that’s an excellent question!
From an introvert’s perspective, extroverts have it pretty easy. Especially in work life, they enjoy advantages. Not only do they make customer contacts more easily, but they usually end their work day less stressed in general than their introverted colleagues.
Privately, they are then supposedly the people with whom you get along well and with whom you can have a good time — or so they say.
👉 Although this is also a prejudgment. But more on that later.
We introverted, on the other hand, struggle with our energy levels every time we socialize — be it in business or privately among friends. And in particular, people with intuitive natures have an extreme tendency to what is known as “overthinking.”
👉 Overthinking means that our thoughts are always “at work”. There is no simple “letting go” and “enjoying”. Our psyche remains under constant stress, which is ultimately incredibly exhausting.
And when our friends then ask us “to come out of our shells more”, “just to have fun”, or “not to make such a serious face”, it puts us under pressure and we think even more!
So do you want to lure your introverted friends out of their shells?
Then such statements are the worst way. You’re not doing them a favor, even if you mean well.
About Fairy Tales and Myths
☝️ There are the wildest theories about being an introvert.
- Introverts are shy.
- Introverts are boring.
- Introverts are arrogant.
- Introverts don’t like parties.
- Introverts are unhappy.
- Introverts are good listeners.
- Introverts like to read.
- Introverts have low self-esteem.
- Introverts are anxious.
- Introverts (insert whatever you’ve heard about introverts 🥴).
All nonsense.
Introverts may or may not have these traits. This is a question of the individual character and not our energy level. And — newsflash 💡 — extroverts may also have exactly those traits!
Now, I have mentioned the energy level. And that’s what whether someone is an extrovert or an introvert is all about. You can think of it like a rechargeable battery. 🔋
A rechargeable battery stores energy. When the battery is empty, you have to recharge it.
- Extroverts spend a nice evening with friends. Some may visit a bar or disco. They just “let loose” and feel reborn afterward.
- Introverts need “alone time” to recharge their batteries. This can be a movie night at home, reading a book in a quiet corner, or playing video games. While introverts are alone or with close family, there is no overthinking. There are no expectations placed on them. They can “switch off for a while.”
And then, there are also ambivalent people who move between the two fronts. They like to be around people, but also enjoy time alone.
👉 By the way:
Just because someone is introverted and thus activities like attending discos or parties are stressful for them, it doesn’t mean they wouldn’t enjoy them.
It’s important to understand this because mistakenly, some people think they are doing their introverted friends a favor by not inviting them to such gatherings. And this is also a misconception.
Whether introverted, extroverted, or ambivalent, most of us at least appreciate the thought! Even if the evening is going to be stressful for us, we can still have fun together. And even if we decline, we’re glad we’ve been thought of. 🥰👍
Even Extroverts Are Not Always Happy
At a party or a social gathering, people usually expect one thing above everything else: a good mood! But what if we’re not feeling so good right now?
We introverted would probably stay at home, shut ourselves off from the world for a while and get our minds off Netflix and Steam.
An extrovert would miss social interaction. So the solution would actually be to get distracted by those around you and feel better after an evening together. If possible — without having to put on a mask.
Ideally, friends accept you even on bad days
— and you have enough confidence in yourself so that you don’t have to pretend. Only that the world is not always ideal.
The problem of an extroverted person here is dependence.
To be able to read a book in peace, we don’t need anyone. But for a social gathering, other people are essential. Otherwise, the gathering wouldn’t be “social.”
And then there were the years when the world was hit by the Corona pandemic.
For the first time, it became very clear how much extroverts in particular suffer when they are deprived of social contact.
The Human Being Is an Individual
Hence, we can summarize that the level between extraversion and introversion depends on how our energy works. And that’s it.
Whatever else we read or think we know about traits and abilities are traits we can have, but don’t necessarily have. Rather, these are related to our individual personalities, as well as other factors, such as
- the culture we live in
- or the state of our mental health.
And since humans are highly manipulative and influenceable, we may even develop certain traits precisely because they are attributed to introversion/extraversion.
But by doing so, we only limit our horizons.
- Extroverts may also enjoy reading or be good listeners.
- Introverts may also be good leaders.
Just to name a few examples. Because if we let go of certain prejudices, we open up new perspectives that can steer our lives in an unknown and surprisingly exciting direction!
💬 Do you consider yourself rather an introvert or an extrovert?
Share it in the comments!
