Escape
This is that time of the year when it rains incessantly like it’s going to drown the world. I should feel good, my demons hushed by the roar of the downpour. Why not? After all, I love rain, the grey overcast skies that prelude rain and the cool clear skies that follow. But it’s been a while I have loved anything, been a while I have lived life. Past class tests gone bad, projects’ deadlines looming- on one pretext or another I have been putting life on hold.
Everyday I read excerpts from “A Song of Ice and Fire” scattered around web which makes my heart greedy and my brain imagines the pleasure of reading the whole of it. I’ve been denying myself that pleasure citing upcoming tests. A much needed and under-utilized vacation of two weeks has come to end. I regret not going home. I regret denying myself the taste of mom made kheer and pakodas. I neither am gypsy nor have the lineage of astrologers but I can predict the future- tomorrow is going to be a terrible day. With a subject test, lab report submission and a viva scheduled tomorrow there is little room for the prediction to turn wrong. It’s all so overwhelming- what to do and what to risk that I just want to escape. And, breathe.
With rain pouring mercilessly from the skies, the gravel roads leading home must be covered in rainwater. I miss riding bicycle alone on that road making splashes. Stuck in routines and weighed down by the heft of expectations and ambitions, I miss the kid I used to be. I want to be home. I want to go to vegetable market with my little brother and race him back to home. It becomes harder to beat him every time we race. It would be thrilling to see how difficult to beat he has become. The bridge, over the rivulet, I used to spend time pondering must miss me dearly. I want to be there with my cycle, watch fishes flowing with the waves as it rains and let the clock tick by.
Zerone is an undergrad publication at I.O.E, Pulchowk focusing on People (their creative side, their thoughts, their lives) and Technology (the new, the old, everything).
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