HOME
Perhaps home is where the heart is. Perhaps that is exactly why it’s the first place you learn to run from.
As far as I remember, it started in my early childhood. At least that’s the earliest memory that I can recall. I reminisce about times when my aama used to sunbath with her pals telling them stories about all the ways I have been levelheaded since my childhood. How I always knew what I wanted in my heart. It became a definite definition of my existence until I went to middle school. There the war was waged between who I thought I was thus far and the infinite possibility of who I could be. Now the world was a home and my life a series of limitless prospects.
Home is where the heart is but where is it? What does it want now that it has seen endless possibilities?
What could I be? What was I so far? Where do I linger around when my heart is at war?
The war went on for years and when it was all over, I came back to myself, to my own heart — a delicate mosaic of veins, blood and fibers, a dwelling place for the essence of who I am which now encompasses the greatness of universe. In the vulnerability of its mortality, the relentless march of time, I reckoned the difference it made yet there was no rest or rehabilitation for me, only ghosts. I could never be all the people I wanted to be. In the end, it’s always home that damns us.
Regardless of the cemetery in my heart, it freed me in strange ways. In the dance between my heart, my home, acting as a silent prisoner and an admirer of a flee, within the fragility of its own existence, it found a profound beauty — a beauty created of the realization that this body, an inmate of time, is also a repository of experiences that color the fabric of existence. It contains the melody of joy and the tempo of sadness, the ecstasy of dance and the estrangement of solitude.
In the struggle between captivity and liberation, my heart, my home became a canvas of liberation- a freedom found not in escape from itself but in the acceptance of its transient beauty.
Home is exactly where your heart is. And your heart is limitless and free.
#BloggingCompetition #Home #DearHome
