Waffles for Eleven
“STRANGER THINGS” movie review (yes, it’s an 6+ hour movie so do stock up on eggo waffles beforehand)
When it finally says “Netflix” across the screen so much has happened. By varying the lengths of introductions — and heightening the drama to reach what is traditionally only achieved at the end of shows — STRANGER THINGS binges us into a world of nostalgia for those who were raised by Spielberg’s VHSs. There is little reason to ever not select “next episode.”
Which is news to Winona Ryder, playing Joyce Byers, the mother of an abducted child who’s forced to re-decorate her ceiling with Christmas lights, porch with axe holes, and living room wall with painted letters in order to speak with her son in the Upside-Down: “Winona Ryder is admittedly a late bloomer in terms of electronic devices and hereby didn’t know what streaming was, when she was approached for this Netflix series,” according to UselessDaily.com.
The STRANGER THINGS filmmakers, Matt Duffer and Ross Duffer are twins born in 1984. Reagan was President. But are they identical? Is their mind one in the same? Ross explained to Vulture.com, “Back when we were born, they didn’t do those tests and we just looked so similar that everyone assumed we were identical. But we don’t actually have confirmation, and we’re too freaked out to get a test now because finding out that we’re not identical could really screw us up psychologically.”
On one hand Slate describes STRANGER THINGS as “an homage to and pastiche of all things Spielberg — and a bulwark against a time when Netflix no longer has streaming rights to E.T. Created by the Duffer brothers, STRANGER THINGS pays respect not just to Spielberg but to Star Wars, ’80s horror films, and Dungeons & Dragons,” and on the other hand Slate describes STRANGER THINGS “as a little empty, a paean to the Duffer brothers’ own youth masquerading as a compliment to a master.” I find their tributes to the masters of VHS to be quite filling.
The original Star Wars was released on May 25, 1977. Jimmy Carter was President, and George Lucas was — according to IMDB — “so sure the film would flop that instead of attending the premiere, he went on holiday to Hawaii with his good friend Steven Spielberg, where they came up with the idea for Raiders of the Lost Ark.” It totaled $775 million, surpassing Jaws to become the highest-grossing film of all time, until the release of E.T. the Extra-Terrestrial. Eleven, like E.T., is bald and hidden in the room of a brave child for the first third of the movie. Wikipedia summarizes the rise of 1980s horror films as, “Creativity from 1970s horror films extended throughout the 1980s, except having more gore, with many successful 1980s horror films having numerous sequels as their murderers were themselves unstoppable.” So that’s a fact. I am currently fact checking Slate if you haven’t noticed. The streaming generation has transformed sequels into series’ and yet again we have a seemingly unstoppable demogorgon. Dungeons and Dragons was first published in 1974 by Tactical Studies Rules Inc., and this entire series just may be people acting out a few turns of the game. With that said, let’s meet the players.
Characters in order of likability, headlined by one scene that explains why:
1. Eleven. ‘Nuff Said.
Elle, also known as “Eleven” is played by Millie Bobby Brown, who was born in 2004. Bush was President. The actress is reportedly, “freaked out by sharks.”
Like most humans, she walks the fine line between friend and monster while being the girl that divides and unites a group of boys. Unlike most humans, her father performed LSD experiments on her mother before isolating Eleven in underground cells and sensory deprivation tanks to maximize her ESP abilities. But she just likes waffles and that makes me smile. Did you know M&Ms rejected the role of Reese Pieces in E.T.?
EVEN BABIES ARE DREAMING OF BEING ELEVEN !!!
BEHIND THE SCENES WITH ACTRESS:
Bold Season 2 Predictions From “MovieTime.Guru Child Actress of the Year” award winner Millie Bobby Brown. I made up this award for this very article, Waffles for Eleven:
2. Mike, also know as “Dungeon Master.”
It’s a distant second. He’s trustworthy, someone for the viewer to think ‘that could be me.’ And he falls in love with Eleven, a teen romance that you can’t help but root for while knowing it will dissolve into infinite pieces within the Upside-Down.
3. Chief Jim Hopper, or as local woman said, “Hopps. Officer Hopper, Hopp our Hero, Hopped on up on Hopper… Did they call him that?”
Chief Hopper is the badass of the show. Someone that “should” ignore his government superiors — but with every sign of cover up — he takes another step toward breaking the law in the cause of protecting his people. More specifically, he’s teaches such invaluable lesson as:
- “how to negotiate with secret government organizations run by a guy named Papa,”
- “mornings are for coffee and contemplation,” and
- “how to leave waffles behind for LSD created beings that may have disappeared into thin air.”
In addition to being at the crux of THE DEAL that concludes STRANGER THINGS season 1, Hopper is seen leaving Waffles in the woods. Who could they be for ? Did Eleven not dissolve into the Upside-Down ?? When is season 2 coming out ???
Last Place: Barb
…WHAT ABOUT BARB!!!!
HER CAR WAS MOVED TO THE BUS STATION?? JUST MOVED? No one’s double checking this but every kid at school and the government is search partying for Will Byers???
So that was cool. Better if you just watch STRANGER THINGS.
