Missionary Position: Pros, Cons and How to Make It Naughtier
Often dismissed as vanilla, missionary has all kinds of fun options to make it kinkier, hotter, deeper and harder.
I’ll say it upfront. The missionary position and its many variations aren’t among our favorites for sex.
Unquestionably, doggy-style is our go-to position for a variety of reasons, not the least of which is that it affords deep, hard intercourse, spanking, anal play, double-penetration and skin-slapping intercourse — all of which Lauren and I enjoy. We are a kinky couple and missionary and its variations aren’t that kinky unless a third partner (or more) is in the mix.
But I don’t say that to bag on or diminish missionary and its variations. Missionary has a lot of advantages, starting with it being a great way to make love. In fact, it’s the “default” most couples use for making love. Its traditional variation was how Lauren and I made love the first time. That is to say, it’s a “safe” position for new lovers.
But it’s also the only way many couples fuck, and thus it’s not surprising that missionary position sex can, over time, become dull.
It doesn’t have to be dull! If missionary position is your go-to or maybe, like for Lauren and me, it’s a “sometimes” thing, I hope this article helps inspire some ideas for spicing it up.
Before I go further, we define missionary as a series of sex positions all involving the guy on top.
Variations of Missionary
There are many variations of the missionary position and we’ve probably tried all of them. Here are our favorites (all of which you can learn more about here):
- Eagle: Her legs are spread, up and bent at the knees and my arms are over her thighs to hold them in place. This variation allows for deep, hard fucking. This variation can also be good for G-Spot simulation, especially if we have a firm pillow under her ass — and also vibrator use.
- Butterfly: Her legs are pushed back and also bent at the knees so her calves are about parallel with the bed/floor. I’m back and off her and holding her legs or her ankles up while I thrust. I like this variation because it gives me a great visual of the action. Plus, this is a fun variation for watching Lauren get herself off with a vibrator while I nail her. We have shot (with our cameras) some amazing POV sex in this position.
- Anvil: Her legs are spread, fully extended so they are straight, and back, allowing for a aggressive, deep pounding of her pussy or ass. Not super comfortable for her and not vibrator-friendly. We do the anvil variation for only short spurts. It’s not for love-making — more for straight-up fucking.
- Viennese Oyster: Her lower back and legs are up and pushed all the way back to the extent that her ankles are almost behind her head. Allows me to hammer her pussy or ass like my bitch while she calls me daddy and pull out and ejaculate all over her face like she’s my cumslut. Yeah, it’s fun. As we’ve aged, this variation has gotten a little less practical but we still do it now and then. Not vibrator-friendly but super hot!
Missionary Pros
Some pros to guy-on-top/missionary position include:
- Many variations: The variations above are only a few among many. Lots of opportunities for experimentation.
- Intimacy: Allows for eye contact, kissing (some variations do not), hand-holding, conversation and generally connecting at an intimate level. These are huge pluses!
- Breast access: Depending on the variation, allows me to easily kiss and suck on Lauren’s nipples and/or fondle her breasts.
- Threesome- and group sex-friendly: Very fun when there’s a third partner (or more). If the third partner is a guy, Lauren can suck him off while she’s getting fucked by me or vice versa; if another woman, she can straddle for some oral pleasure while getting hammered.
- Anal: The anvil and Viennese Oyster are great for anal sex. We do prefer doggy-style for anal sex but anvil and Viennese Oyster are wonderful for it, too!
- Visual: An awesome position for POV sex tapes. Also, I love, love, love to watch breasts jiggle while I pound her. Super sexy!
Cons
- If the female enjoys a really hard and deep pounding (which is Lauren’s preference), missionary can be limiting.
- Can get boring after a while.
- Seems to be more conducive to headboard-banging, which can be fun unless you have kids in the house….
- More geared to the man as the woman is on the receiving end.
- The intimacy of missionary can make it a bit of a nonstarter in swinger situations requiring emotional boundaries.
- Perhaps the biggest con of all: If the woman requires clitoral stimulation to orgasm, missionary makes it hard for her to access her vagina with her hand/toy unless variations allowing access are used.
Next up: Our favorite: doggy-style!
