A Farewell to Eidolon

Photo by Daniel Josef on Unsplash

In March of 2016 I threw my career away with both hands.

It’s not like it was much of a career at that point. I was rounding on a year of unemployment after quitting my teaching job for all the regular fucked-up reasons people quit academic jobs. I was also eight-months pregnant with my second child, so my academic days felt numbered in more ways than one. I didn’t have much to lose. …

Some of The Editors’ Favorite Behind-the-Scenes Memories

Creature Report! Creature Report!

Art by Sarah Scullin. Images from here and here.

Heracles, Orpheus, Philoctetes, Tiphys, Meleager, Peleus … Idmon.
ah hem

Tiphys! Activate Creature Report!
Creature Report! Creature Report.
Creature Report

Gegeines have six arms each… (check, check, check)
Which gives them an extensive reach … (check, check, bree)
Thirty fingers and ten toes (creature report)
One head but six elbows (creature report, creature report)
Impossible they are to beat (check, check, check)
But never fear my friends, for here comes Heracleeeeees!

Go Gegeines … Go Gegeines … Go Gegeines!

A harpy vomits on your fooood… (check, check, check)
(Which frankly is a little rude) (check, check, bree)
The head and breasts…

A Defense, with Citations

Photo by Brooke Cagle on Unsplash

The first line of the first satire by the great Roman poet Juvenal says, “It is difficult not to write satire.” After having dealt with women my entire 29 years, I find I must concede to the wisdom of the ancients.

That’s why, when my audience bristled at my suggestion that I would rather let a squirrel chew off my nuts than date a feminist, I was dismayed that this seemingly erudite crowd totally missed the intertext with Juvenal, who said he preferred suicide to marriage (Juv. Sat. VI).

While some people might actually think that there are only two…

“Dear Daddy, no matter what happens, I’ll always be your little sister”—Antigone to Oedipus. Photo by Kate Macate on Unsplash, adapted by Sarah Scullin

Dad, you’re a cut above the rest!

—Kronos to Ouranos

I couldn’t stomach the thought of life without you!

—Zeus to Kronos

I know I’m sometimes a headache, but thanks for putting up with me!

—Athena to Zeus

Dear Dad, you are the wind beneath my wings

—Icarus to Daedalus

You’ll always be a part of me, Dad

—Aphrodite to Ouranos

We haven’t always seen eye to eye, but Nobody’s a better dad than you!

—Cyclops to Poseidon

I’d kill for you, Papa

—Orestes to Agamemnon


—Electra to Agamemnon

Sometimes you chew us out, but we know you always mean well, Dad!

—Aglaus, Orchomenus, and Calaeus to Thyestes

Happy Father’s Day, Papa-ppapappapai!!!

—Philoctetes to Poeas

I know you won’t believe me, but you’re head and shoulders above the rest, Papa!

—Cassandra to Priam

Happy Father’s Day to the guy who keeps me all in one piece!

— Absyrtus to Aeëtes

My love for you will never flag!

— Theseus to Aegeus

I would do anything for you, Dad

— 49 of the 50 Danaids to Danaus

… but I won’t do that!

— Hypermnestra to Danaus

No one could ever take your place!

— Oedipus to Laius

No man is greater than you, Daddy!

— Achilles to Peleus

“You’re in” a class by yourself, Father

— Perseus to Zeus

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Gone Sour on Sourdough? Improve Your Coronavirus Foodie Game with Ancient Food Hacks

Triclinium from Limes fort at Echzell (via Wikimedia Commons)

After you’ve filled your self-isolated days with mastering sourdough baking, sewing PPE, finishing your book and setting up the victory garden, it’s only natural to feel the urge to consult the wisdom of the ancient Romans to find innovative (and tasty!) ways to fill your time. Thankfully, the first book of the Ancient Roman cookbook De Re Coquinaria by Apicius is full of cooking tips for the discerning foodie who wants to eat as the Romans did. What follows are some lightly edited (no, really) culinary hacks from Apicius:

Rose wine but without Roses

Say you want some rose (not rosé) wine but don’t have…

A Name Generator for Putting the “Real Doctor” in your Classics Doctorate

Trixie Sprinkles McDoggo, Tufts-recognized prodigy, specializing in bioethics. (Photo by Charles Deluvio on Unsplash)

A “news” story from San Francisco’s KSBW (and published in SFGate) circulated last week, in which “classicist” Victor Davis Hanson was cited as the apparent lead source on a Stanford study into whether or not COVID-19 began circulating in the US in 2019. Hanson uses his spotlight to pin the blame for the virus on “Chinese nationals” and to scare-quote “science,” so don’t let anyone tell you the classics are irrelevant or that Homer is dead!

The original article has since been retracted by the author (but you can still read it here). Jane Hu has enumerated all the problems…

8 (Fake) Forthcoming Myth-Inspired Musicals

C. Grignion, “Engraving of Two Female Dancers From Herculaneum” (1773), adapted by Sarah Scullin

Hadestown, the folk-operatic broadway hit that retells the myth of Orpheus and Eurydice as a Great Depression post-apocalyptic love story promises to do for myth what Hamilton did for history; the success of Hadestown, plus the buzz generating for Rufus Wainwright’s Hadrian, the 3-hour long operatic love story between the eponymous emperor and his beloved Antinous, indicate that the time is ripe for more classically-inspired musicals. Here’s a roundup of eight more prodcutions that attempt to cash in on the classics trend:

1. Theogonytown

A jazzy, all-puppet spectacle that transforms the generational battles between the Greek gods into a modern tale where…

Sarah Scullin

Classicist, Writer, Mother. Managing Editor of Eidolon. Finisher of 95% of projects, 100% of the time.

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