I Finally Watched Barbie
Lines which stuck, Part 2
Read the first part here: https://medium.com/@ayodaphne330/i-finally-watched-barbie-f30666cb165c
Am I no longer hot when I’m in my feelings? Is it my destiny to live and die a life of blond fragility?
Poor Ken.
So much has been and is being said on toxic masculinity and yet, it seems nothing seems to stick long enough for positive change. Just today, I covered an acquaintance’s transport fare because I was the one who suggested taking Keke instead of trekking and I have apparently bruised another fragile male ego. I have taken away his birthright as a male to provide. For goodness sake, I’m not even his significant other, why should it matter? Oh because I’m a woman. Really, how did we get here? A place where being masculine means dominance and control. A place where emotions are equated to weakness when in truth, they are strengths? For the Kens of the world who feel this way, and are battling the confines of society’s, culture or tradition’s rules, I just want to say that although we number a few, there are women out there who would embrace your vulnerability and emotions, and would not join society to shame you for it. Some of us want to see “the man behind the tan”. Be soft if that is who you are, it won’t be easy but for this woman who doesn’t want a hard guy, try to be yourself; a flawed-makes-mistake-emotional- human, like most of us are but rarely admit. Block out the noise if you can. Lord knows we need more heart than egos and brawns in this cruel world.
Does being in a long-term-distance-casual low-commitment relationship mean nothing anymore?
I must admit, this particular line cracked me up. The irony of it all! I mean, anyone with a little bit of common sense should know that you do not bring expectations into a “long-term-distance casual low-commitment relationship”. It’s simply folly. This line summed up our dating realities in majority of modern society. It is sad but then, we have to watch it unfold before our eyes and hope we find the love we each deserve.
Ashawo!!!!
You have to find a way to reject men’s advances without damaging their egos. Because if you say yes to them, you’re a tramp, but if you say no to them, you’re a prude.
I think I left this for last because while this is probably a universal experience for women, sexual harassment has come under various lenses, some downright ignorant! If I could convert my experience with harassment from the opposite sex and from some of my own too into money, I would be basking in my “rich aunty” title without shame.
See her face, no be say she even fine sef!
Yeye prostitute!
Ashawo! For some reason, they really love this one.
All because a girl dared to reject a man’s advances. How dare she?!
When I read OBA.T.K ‘s article asking a very crucial question; https://obaditanoluwakorede.medium.com/whats-the-male-word-for-slut-09e47a0a94db
I realized there really might be no answer.
My experience with men when rejecting their advances is usually, most often than not, messy. The area boys sometimes become aggressive, slut shaming you for refusing to sleep with them or hand over your number when demanded. Ironic isn’t it? The more “educated” ones and I use the term loosely, sulk, turn petty and bitter. Very disappointing to say the least. The why is not far fetched, male entitlement to a woman’s body.
Some consider “Barbie” a feminist movie and yes that could ring true for some, but I consider it a movie from the human lens because above male or female, woman or man, boy child or girl child, we are first and most importantly, HUMAN AND EQUAL.
End of rant. Or is it?
Thanks for reading.
