Your Fears Are Self-Imposed

Rejection.

Failure.

Embarrassment.

Death.

Something scares you.

Whatever it is, I’m not here to make you feel better about it. I won’t tell you it’s normal to be afraid. I won’t empower you to live in fear.

Because while it is NORMAL to fear things, it is NOT okay. Living in fear is NOT healthy — at least not how most people experience fear.

When you’re afraid, you live defensively. On your heels. You feel helpless, so you can’t go after life with reckless abandon. Simply put, you feel like a loser. You LIVE like a loser.

You allow fear to dominate you

Here is a FACT. Most things that you’re afraid of are self-imposed, limiting beliefs. YOU decided something was scary, so now you’re afraid. YOU let your inner bitch win the battle, and now you’re paralyzed.

When you’re afraid, all those what-if questions flood your brain. You start second-guessing your every move. You see danger around every corner. You expect the worst.

You fear that if you take a risk, you could lose it all. That your spouse would divorce you if she knew about your pornography addiction. That you would lose all your customers if you doubled your prices. That you’d be outed as a fraud if people knew the “real” you.

You’re not alone. Self-imposed fears affect everyone.

How to overcome fear

Recently, a young man asked how to overcome his fear of cold calling. Before I get to the answer I gave, let me tell you something about myself.

Fifteen years ago, I wasn’t afraid of cold calling. I was afraid of EVERYTHING, and I accepted what people said about me: that I was a LOSER who would never go anywhere or do anything.

Throughout my 20s and early 30s, these self-imposed fears limited my impact, income, and influence. They forced me to live a mediocre life. As a result, I had no passion, no drive, no hope.

Then something inside of me snapped. In an instant, I was done. Done with fear of failure. Done with other people’s perception of me and what I could achieve. Done listening to the little BITCH in my head that told me to be careful.

Overnight, I stopped being afraid of failure. I realized the real danger wasn’t taking risks. It was avoiding them. I stopped seeing life as full of danger and started seeing it as full of GROWTH OPPORTUNITIES!

With this mindset came a new set of fears. Fears that drive me to succeed every single day.

Now, I still have fears. But they push me to be the best me I can be.

I fear not taking action, not trying, not dominating every day and making the most of every minute I have on planet Earth.

Unlike many fears, these fears don’t cripple me. They enable me to make a full commitment to every aspect of my life.

As a result of these fears, I’m committed to being a dad and being there for my kids. I’m committed to being the best husband I can be, to love my wife with words AND actions. I’m committed to growing my business empire each and every day, even when bigger businesses are closing their doors.

Let fear be a catalyst

So how can that young man overcome his self-imposed fear of cold calling and the rejection that will come through it? The same way you can get over your own self-imposed fear. By finding whatever supports that fear and cutting it out of your life. Anything that props up fear and makes it look legitimate has to go.

In the young man’s situation, I gave him some crazy advice. I told him, “Give away all your money, every penny of it.”

How will this get rid of his fears? Because when you’re broke, your vision changes.

I don’t want the guy to be homeless. I don’t want him to live a miserable life. I want him to be hungry for success. To see that the risk of rejection during cold calls is nothing compared to the potential rewards. I want him to realize that betting on himself and going after success like a fighter jet is the ONLY way to find satisfaction in life.

And I want the same for YOU!

So what’s at the root of your fear? A shrinking bank account? Losing lifelong friends? Finding out you’re not as cool as your Instagram profile makes you look?

Whatever it is, FACE THE FEAR and take action to get past it!

Cut off toxic relationships. Have that hard talk with your spouse. Make that cold call.

You’ll think more clearly, enjoy stronger relationships, and turn potential customers into raving fans. But it’s not possible if you let self-imposed fears get in the way.

Overpower your fears

We all impose self-limiting beliefs and fears on ourselves that take away from our potential success, significance, and enjoyment of life.

I don’t know what your fear is. Maybe it’s cold calling. Maybe it’s rejection. Maybe it’s a fear of taking a risk, losing money, or being judged.

Whatever your fear, it’s not bigger than your WILL POWER, PASSION, and DRIVE.

When I made a decision to take action and not let self-imposed fears slow me down, my life changed. As a result of that decision, every day since then has been better than the last. Have there been failures along the way? You bet. Has the worst come true? Multiple times.

But that doesn’t stop me. Because I’m too busy moving forward. Too busy looking to the next challenge, where massive success awaits. Where these bruises and scars prove I deserve to be there.

So if you want to have impact, if you want your marriage to kick ass, if you want to become a master of cold calls and build a business empire, stand up to your self-imposed fears. Your success and satisfaction in life and business depend on it.