How To Homeschool
Interviews with Homeschool Parents I Like — Donna Baer
I’m a second-generation homeschool mama of 5 kids, and in one of the wildest twists of 2020, I’m suddenly getting messages every day with some variation of “Hey! Never thought I’d think about homeschooling, but I am. Can you help me? Where do I start? Please help!”
I love having these conversations because I believe bringing education in house has the potential to be life-changing for so many families. I can give you my favorite resources and books to read and some encouragement, but the truth is each homeschool is as varied and unique as the people under that roof. Your homeschool will be different from ours, and that is a beautiful thing.
So, I’m interviewing some of the coolest homeschool parents I know (and some I only know digitally) to get their take on what the entire world wants to know — How do you homeschool? Glad you’re following along! (Read more here for a full intro into the project.)
Today’s interview is with — my mom! Ivy-league grad who left a career in investment banking to educate her (eventual) 10 kids. She’s been homeschooling for 29 years and has just published a course called “Homeschooling Quickstart K-3: Everything you need to know to successfully educate your children at home in less than an hour a day” Check out the course here —https://strong-happy-family.teachable.com/
(Use this coupon code K330 for 30% off!)
Hi Mom! Ok — can you share about your family — kids, your background, dad’s background. Did you ever think you’d be homeschooling? How did you get to where you are today?
I grew up in north Jersey, weaned on Bruce Springsteen. I met my husband Steve, who was from Arizona, at a campus job at Brown University in 1979. We’ve been married for 37 years and have two daughters and eight sons. I was pregnant six times in the 1990’s and spent the decade moring sick — don’t even ask me who Madonna is. When Steve and I were dating in college our pastor and his wife were homeschooling, and we both found the idea really intriguing. When our oldest child was born (that would be you, for the record:) we decided we wanted to create a life where we could invest in our kids and really enjoy them.
I love it. Well, you definitely invested in us — I hope you enjoyed it along the way too. (Sorry, again, for my years of sass:) Ok — let’s talk method. How do you describe your homeschooling philosophy?
I love the Classical Method, but I don’t have the Tiger Mom instincts to make memory work super-disciplined. I try to focus on providing my kids with the skills they need in order to teach themselves anything.
What have you loved most about this journey?
Time. With. My. Kids.
I can’t imagine how I could have connected on a daily basis with my kids if we hadn’t been homeschooling. Often a conversation that started about a geometry proof ended in a discussion about an argument a teenager was having with a friend. Homeschooling forced me to meet one-on-one with each of my children every day. Sometimes our talks were perfunctory; others were profound. I don’t think I could have gotten to know my kids on a deep level if they had been public schooled and I had tried to shoehorn our relationship into the twenty minutes after basketball practice but before homework.
I’m not crying. You’re crying. That’s one of the things I valued so much about being homeschooled by you — you’d think being in a family of 12, quality time would never happen, but I always felt like you had time for me. That’s an incredible gift. And now those other 11 people (and now their spouses and kids) are all my closest friends too.
Over the past 29 years, what have been your biggest homeschooling challenges? How did you (or didn’t you) overcome them?
My biggest challenge was trying to meet the individual learning needs of each of my kids at the same time. To use the passive voice: balls were dropped.
I just couldn’t answer every question, check every assignment, or correct every dangling participle. But though my kids may have gaps in their education (spoiler alert: everyone does), the fact that I was not constantly available made them work harder at teaching themselves, which was (see above) one of my goals. (Or honestly, it probably became my goal when I realized I was a failure at meeting my kids’ needs.)
You seem to enjoy learning for yourself, and not just for your kids. Can you share what you do to keep your mind engaged? What are you learning about now? Why do you think it’s important to keep being curious/learning new skills etc?
One of my little hacks as I homeschooled was reading aloud to my kids the things that I really wanted to read. Reading aloud enhanced my comprehension: My kids would often ask me to explain what I had just read, which forced me to think carefully and paraphrase. That really cemented the information in my mind. I did that with theology books, newspapers, novels, even owner’s manuals.
Right now I’m working through a new systematic theology, trying to figure out how to create an online course, and learning about the birds in my new backyard. I imagine life would be very dull if we didn’t keep learning.
You really did model constant curiosity so well. But I know there were some really hard, low points. When you feel defeated, what do you go back to?
I love Elisabeth Elliot’s advice: Do the next good thing. When I’m discouraged I can choose to wallow, or I can choose to do something. Sometimes it’s just cleaning the bathroom. But doing something good or useful often leads to doing another good or useful thing, which can begin to open your eyes to new ideas or permutations on your problem. It doesn’t always work, but there’s nothing wrong with having a clean bathroom.
Ok — next time you’re feeling discouraged you are welcome to come over. We have plenty of bathrooms to clean if you’re looking for the next good thing:) You’ve homeschooled for over 29 years. How have homeschoolers changed over a quarter of a century?
Homeschooling is more mainstream now than it was when I started in the early 90’s. Homeschooling parents then were still a little paranoid about truancy officers arresting them. (It did happen.) There were no online resources, so your only opportunity to inspect curriculum was at the big conventions — which were madhouses. There were fewer “kinds” of homeschoolers then: most were very strict fundamentalists, so there was a definite “tone” to homeschooling.
I’m grateful that the homeschool world has matured. I love the diversity of people teaching their kids at home, and the wealth of resources online.
Tell us about this teachable course you’ve published. What kinds of topics will you cover?
When COVID turned most families into overnight, reluctant homeschoolers a lot of people reached out to me for advice about teaching their kids at home. I decided it would be most helpful if I answered their FAQ’s through an online class. My first course is called Homeschooling QuickStart K-3 where I describe how to teach Kindergarten through 3rd grade in under an hour a day. (With ten kids I got pretty good at streamlining.) I plan to add a 4th-6th grade course soon, then hopefully move on to middle school and high school courses. (If you’re interested in checking it out, use the promo code K330 and I’d love to give you 30% off: https://strong-happy-family.teachable.com/)
I love it! I think this will be incredibly helpful to anyone embarking on homeschooling this fall — or honestly anyone who hasn’t been homeschooling for 29 years. So let’s talk about rookie mistakes — if you could redo anything in your first year homeschooling, what would it be?
I would care less about what other people thought. When I began homeschooling I felt like I had to prove myself to the critics. That put unkind pressure on my kids to perform and caused a lot of strife in our home. As I matured as a homeschooler I felt the freedom to let my kids blossom at their own speed and not care about the haters; I wish I had had that perspective with my first few kids.
Love you mom, and love how you walk out the freedom to change and evolve as you grow. Watching that up close is an incredible thing. Any other advice to families just beginning this journey? Any other topics you want to write on or encourage readers with?
My advice: Relax. You got this!
The most important thing you need to know before you homeschool is your child — and you’re already the world’s leading expert on that topic. Everything else you can learn along with him. Enjoy the journey!
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Thanks, Mom, for being the first person in the hotseat! More interviews with homeschooling parents (who are NOT related to me!) coming at you soon!
