To All The Different Lives I’ve Lived.
Choices are a funny thing. An old, familiar road feels monotonous because it limits our opportunities. A new one seems intimidating because we don’t know where it will take us. Yet, a road is a road and if it remains untraveled, its mysteries will remain oblivious.
“Sometimes, unexpected turns lead to the most incredible places.”
Whether things end up well or not, everything slowly fades away. In those fading moments, we want to believe that everything was destined and that there was nothing we could’ve done differently. But that’s simply our attempt at self-persuasion. We are guilty of continuing down the same, unfulfilling road, knowing that it doesn’t take us to the life we want to live. We shouldn’t justify our lack of choice for there is always a choice; we just don’t dare to take it.
We are runners. We run away from our problems, live in denial and play the blame game. But we’re also fighters. We eventually come to face to face with our problems and fight them, as best as we can. It takes time to go from runners to fighters and then from fighters to winners. We wouldn’t be here if we gave up when life was hard. We wouldn’t have grown if we weren’t forced to adapt.
“Change is hard, but so is staying the same.”
Residing within us are countless personas — the past selves, the present self, and the imagined future self. Some bask in the limelight while others remain in the shadows. Each identity, rising like a phoenix from the ashes of its predecessor, carries the wisdom left behind. These identities may lie between the two ends of the spectrum — some, dark and guilty, and others, happy and silly. No matter which one stands in the spotlight, it is a force that still lives inside.
In life, we often make decisions that blur the line between right and wrong, this or that, now or later — we will never know which is the right choice, for who knows, it may not even exist. But if we find ourselves on a path to our dream life and still decide to depart from it, only a fool would disregard such a gift. It’s important to stay on the right track even if it feels like we’re not moving. Just like a steady stream finds a way to cut through the mountains, dedication paves the way to our destination.
Life mirrors a puzzle, where various identities form the pieces on the board. The pieces may look random and unrecognizable, but when you put them in perspective, they fit perfectly like a key to a lock. It takes a whole bunch of pieces to finally create a big picture.
So why should life be any different?
To all the different lives I’ve led, you all make me, me.
It hasn’t been a fairytale, but it hasn’t been a nightmare either.
In one life, I left a hole so big, a void I couldn’t fill.
In another life, a garden bloomed, a sanctuary I dared not kill.
I was seen as a villain by some, and a hero by others.
I welcomed anger in one; a source of strength in another.All these lives feel distant sometimes,
Because it was not one, not two, but a thousand different times.
I may seem like a stupid crazy mess,
But you’re all I have in this long game of chess.I don’t want to live a single colorless life
But a thousand tales, a thousand lives.
Hello hello. This is Harsh.
You may be reading this for the first time(or not?), but if you’re interested in why I write, you can read the About section of my profile.
Put simply, I write about things that I think I’d like to tell myself. I attempt to collate all my dispersed thoughts into a single flow of thought.
If you enjoy reading my work, I hope you can check out my podcast, my audio library of thoughts, Within 5 Minutes, where I try to do justice to these words (terribly!)
You can show me support by joining my Patreon, buying me a coffee or subscribing to my newsletter on Medium.
My Socials:
Instagram — https://www.instagram.com/hacchuu
Email — harsh@ctrlaltgrow.com
