3 small actions to keep you sane when you find yourself caught between where you were and where you’re going.

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Photo by Ian Cylkowski on Unsplash

I feel… uncertain. Restless.

I see something about where I want to go, but I don’t see the whole picture. I don’t have all the pieces in place yet. I’m reaching for it; I’m looking to it; I want to begin moving towards it. But it’s still an idea only, fragmented.

Or —

I don’t yet know what’s next. I know what’s behind me. I know what used to be. But it is no longer, and now there must be something new.

The Space Between.

It’s like that moment in The Matrix when everything sort of freezes, moving in ultra-slow…

6 things that get in the way when we try to create change (and what to do about them).

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Photo by David Clode on Unsplash

I used to think that New Year resolution-setting was the dumbest thing. It didn’t make sense to me.

It seemed like if you wanted to set an ambition for yourself, there was no reason to wait for a particular day on the calendar to do it. There’s nothing magical about January 1.

Now, I appreciate the ritual more than I used to.

It’s easy for life to be swept away with the day-in and day-out of endless small problems. …

Finding change that sticks.

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Photo by Daniel Öberg on Unsplash

For many, January is a time of reflection, forward-looking, and the choice to create change.

It’s exciting.

Newness is fun…

But it’s also no secret that 23% of New Year’s resolutions don’t even make it to February, and 81% fail within the year.

Can we agree that fully implementing New is hard?

Whether you’re a resolution-setter or not, you will have times of transition: sometimes it’s an intentional choice, sometimes it’s an unexpected adaptation. Sometimes it’s as small as becoming someone who flosses every day; sometimes it’s as big as a fundamental growth of character.

Regardless, Transitions-Into-New are often more…

There’s only one real path to an actually thrilling life…

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Photo by Greg Becker on Unsplash

Three Average Stories

Story #1

Our friend — we’ll call him Frederick — likes to get things right.

He likes to feel comfortable in the certainty of what he’s doing.

He won’t begin to act until he’s completely thought through the entire situation and until he feels completely comfortable that he knows exactly what is wanted from him, exactly how he’s going to meet that need and has an idea of what’s going to unfold after he’s made his contribution.

Unfortunately, this idealized situation almost never plays out in his favor…

Most of the time, in reality, projects stagnate as they await…

Note: This is Part 3 in a four-part series on Average Potential.

  • Part 1 lays some theoretical groundwork on what we mean when we say “average,” especially when it comes to personality qualities.
  • Part 2 is a statement that you are averge — whoever you are — and that that’s a good thing.
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Photo by Aarón Blanco Tejedor on Unsplash

The Evolution of Potential

In life, two types of personal evolution can happen: intentional and unintentional (or direct and indirect).

Intentional personal growth is the type that much of the personal development industry focuses on. It’s when you make a decision to pursue a change of character directly, on purpose.


Note: This is Part 2 in a four-part series on Average Potential. Part 1 lays the foundation by unpacking the meaning of “average” and distinguishing between scales of competence and dimensions of quality.

“You are, roughly, average.”

This is a quote from Tom Bilyeu (of Quest Nutrition and Impact Theory).

Whoever you are and whatever your story — whatever you’ve overcome, and whatever you struggle with — you’re pretty much average. And so am I.

And so are the people you read about every day — both the people you love and those you hate.

What are you going to do about it?


Understanding Personality Strengths & Differences

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Photo by Timothy Dykes on Unsplash

My extreme traits are what make me special, right?

It’s my extremes that make me interesting. That’s where my exciting potential lies, because extreme is rare. Right?

So many conversations I’ve had about personality assessments have inadvertently pointed back to this idea.

Where very high or very low percentile marks are reveled in, maybe even exaggerated.

But personality measures aren’t the same as measures of skill, and landing in a mid-tier zone doesn’t at all carry the same implications…

Context: A Sideways Perspective

My background is in dance. I studied under a framework known as Laban-Barteneiff Movement Analysis (which I’ll refer to as “Laban”…

Learning one subtle skill to make it through the long-haul.

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Photo by raquel raclette on Unsplash

Our brains and bodies are built to protect us from things that hurt us. We have reflexes and intuitions that kick in whenever we start walking through fire.

The thing we need to learn, however, is how to discern between the pain that’s worth it, and the pain that points to something that’s leading us somewhere we don’t want to end up.

Warning signs and red flags speak to us in subtle ways.

  • Hey [me], you’re being taken advantage of here.
  • Hey [me], you’re pursuing something that’s a distraction — it’s a substitute for the real thing.
  • Hey [me], what…

How can you discern between your intuitive intelligence and your shortsighted lizard brain?

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Check Yourself

👉 How do you know if you’re on the right track?

When something in your situation is “off,” your intuition will speak to you before your executive functions have caught up to it.

But feelings can also be deceiving. They don’t have a long-term perspective ― they only notice what’s right here, right now.

So how can you discern between your intuitive intelligence and your shortsighted lizard brain?

Depending on who you ask, you’ll get very different answers:

  • “You should only do things that make you feel inspired and alive,” say the self-care purists.
  • “You should feel confident in your…

3 Quick Tools To Help You Stay On Track When Things Get Hard

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Why go through pain, ever?

Exhaustion. Tension. Embarrassment. Uncertainty. Struggle.

Why do any of it?

We each have our own reasons, but ultimately, we go through pain because we believe it’s worth it.

Just because it’s worth it, though, doesn’t mean it’s not hard.

Below are three quick challenges that can help you refocus on your most important struggles and stay on track when things get hard…


In everything, we need something we’re looking ahead to. We engage with all of the struggle — frustration — grind — because it’s pointing toward something.

Question to ask yourself: What does all of my effort point toward?

Heather Kleinschmidt

character development 🌱 movement & perspective 🤸‍♀️ the choice for adventure 🎈 allbecome.com

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