23 Observations on the 2016 Republican Party Platform

The 60-page Republican Party Platform was ratified July 2016 and is freely available at https://www.gop.com/the-2016-republican-party-platform/

People (abroad) want and expect an America that is the most powerful… country on the face of the earth.


…up to five new constitutionally-minded Supreme Court justices… Only such appointments will enable courts to begin to reverse the long line of activist decisions- including Roe (v. Wade)

It’s been 43 years. Move on.

In Obergefell (v. Hodges), five unelected lawyers robbed 320 million Americans of their legitimate constitutional authority to define marriage as the union of one man and one woman.

I guess that’s one way to put it.

We oppose any restrictions (to citizens’) ability to promote their ideas, such as requiring private organizations to publicly disclose their donors to the government… We support… raising or repealing contribution limits, protecting the political speech of advocacy groups, corporations, and labor unions…

Corporations are people, remember?

We oppose ill-conceived laws that would… ban the sale of the most popular and common modern rifle.

We say, people are dying. They say, but they’re so popular!

We oppose the use of public funds (for)… Planned Parenthood

The nation’s largest provider of women’s health services? This is the 21st century.

The environment is too important to be left to radical environmentalists.

By far my favorite line.

That is why we support building a wall… The border wall must cover the entirety of the southern border.

No word on that check from Mexico.

This was good enough for George Washington…

*Rolls eyes*

Congress should approve… Puerto Rico’s… admission as the 51st state of the Union.

What’s this doing here?

…the foundation of civil society, and the cornerstone of the family is natural marriage, the union of one man and one woman… Every child deserves a married mom and dad.

Go fuck yourselves.

A good understanding of the Bible (is) indispensable for the development of an educated citizenry.

That’s a valid opinion, but please don’t impose that on us.

We renew our call for… sexual… education that sets abstinence until marriage as the responsible and respected standard of behavior. That approach… empowers teens to achieve optimal health outcomes.

That approach… doesn’t fucking work.

Sexual assault is a terrible crime… Questions of guilt or innocence must be decided by a judge and jury, with guilt determined beyond a reasonable doubt.

“I’m not racist, but…”

We urge a ban on human cloning

I know this shit is coming, but seeing it in print is still funny

Pornography… has become a public health crisis.

What does that even mean?

Alexander Hamilton wrote…


…the Republican Party is committed to rebuilding the U.S. military into the strongest on earth

Mission accomplished 🎈

We oppose the reinstatement of the draft, except in dire circumstances


(Our party) embraces American exceptionalism and rejects false prophets of decline and diminution.

………Did a never-Trumper slip this in as a joke.

The Iraqi people have been on the front lines in the war on terror. Hundreds of thousands have been killed

That was us, remember?

(NATO’s) continued effectiveness is vital

Who’s going to tell The Donald?

Standing up for… women trafficked into sexual slavery… is not just consistent with American values. It advances important security and economic interests as well.

You can’t make this shit up. They also added to the list “those suffering from disease or starvation”.

Still want to sit this election out?