Julie Kling – Medium

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Julie Kling
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Jane Austen’s Wastebasket

Is it The New Smoking, The Old Kind, or just Smokin’ Hot?

A quiz

2 min readMar 11, 2024

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Is it The New Smoking, The Old Kind, or just Smokin’ Hot?

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Julie Kling
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Slackjaw

Sex Terms For Parents

Blow Job: blowing for 15–30 minutes on your son’s art project so the glue dries properly before he carries it to school.

4 min readApr 14, 2023

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Sex Terms For Parents

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Julie Kling
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Slackjaw

The CDC’s Official Developmental Milestones — Not For Babies, But For Tired AF Parents

To prevent exhaustion, the CDC recommends not having children. If however, that ship has sailed…

4 min readJun 27, 2022

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The CDC’s Official Developmental Milestones — Not For Babies, But For Tired AF Parents

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Julie Kling

My Glutes Have Exhaled

Mom Rage(r) #4 — December ‘23

4 min readDec 9, 2023

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My Glutes Have Exhaled

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Julie Kling

It’s Hard To Find The Funny In Fresh Grief

I find it surreal to carry on with the routine tasks of caregiving and living when so many people are in pain.

3 min readOct 24, 2023

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It’s Hard To Find The Funny In Fresh Grief

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Julie Kling

The Toilet Is My Safe Space

Set a boundary — and then try to defend it with the metaphorical equivalent of a flamethrower, grenade & machine gun all rolled into one.

5 min readOct 24, 2023

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The Toilet Is My Safe Space

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Julie Kling

Sometimes I Slap The Crap Out Of My West Elm Dresser

The headline “Burned-Out Moms Gathered In A Field To Scream” should really be “Nation Abandons Mothers and They’ve Had Enough.”

6 min readOct 24, 2023

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Sometimes I Slap The Crap Out Of My West Elm Dresser

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Julie Kling

Mom Rage is normal. Here’s something fun you can do with it.

Our society is (slowly) grappling with the disproportionate mental and physical load women experience as caregivers…

1 min readAug 30, 2023

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Mom Rage is normal. Here’s something fun you can do with it.

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Julie Kling
in
Greener Pastures Magazine

How To Get Admitted To A Top 10 Cemetery

Top Tips from Elite Eternity Consulting

4 min readApr 28, 2023

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How To Get Admitted To A Top 10 Cemetery

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Julie Kling
in
Slackjaw

Brainstorming Notes For The McDonald’s Adult Happy Meal

American millennial rage (anger = attention); American millennial sadness (sadness = eating); must include McNuggets.

2 min readNov 8, 2022

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Brainstorming Notes For The McDonald’s Adult Happy Meal

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Julie Kling

Julie Kling

I write humor, health & parenting pieces - The New Yorker, McSweeney's, The Wall Street Journal, Slackjaw, Points in Case, Scary Mommy & HuffPost.

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