He Broke My Heart but I Still Love Him: He Broke My Heart but I Want Him Back

Jasmine Norah
6 min readDec 24, 2019

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Photo by Melanie Wasser on Unsplash

He broke my heart but I still love him — He broke my heart but I want him back.

If you have been crying and whining after a breakup, stating that he broke up with me and I want him back then wipe off those streaming tears and use these tips to watch him run right into your arms again.

Calm down
Your first move should be to take a deep breath and calm down. You are only harming yourself by crying and whining. Your guy will only run away if you run towards him with tears streaming down your cheeks and outstretched arms.

Instead, calm yourself down and act mature. Let your guy realize that you have taken the breakup in your stride.

Concentrate only on your own life
Get your own life back on track with killer determination. Learn to become independent by working in an office. Get your body back in shape by working out. Get that facial and body massage to relax your body and mind.

These activities will keep you occupied, boost up your confidence and firm up your body. Your guy will now notice the positive change within you and start doubting his decision of running out on you.

Write a brief apology
Instead of repeatedly apologizing for any mistake on your part, simply write a brief apology and deliver it to him. Let him read your thoughts and appreciate the fact that you have taken the first step. However maintain your distance after delivering the apology.

Remain in your cocoon
During this vulnerable time, do not venture out to a party on your own and end up getting hitched with a guy on the rebound or out of revenge. Instead, remain cocooned within friends and family so that you can remain happily occupied while staying out of trouble.

Make positive changes in your life
If you know the reasons for the breakup then you would need to find out solutions too. If your guy did not like some of your habits then you should try to eliminate them, provided you actually want to from your heart.

Once news of this change gets to your boyfriend, he is sure to be impressed by your efforts and this move will anyway benefit you in the long run.

Remain in touch with your guy’s friends and family
If you shared an excellent relationship with your guy’s family and friends then remain in touch with them but do not mention your breakup before them or cry your heart out before them. Let them watch you handle the breakup with maturity.

This will impress them and they will surely reprimand your boyfriend for taking a hasty step in breaking off with you.

Go for a make-or-break meeting
If your guy has now been sending out hints through mutual friends then he too could be missing you very much.

You can meet up with your boyfriend for a make-or-break meeting so as to remove all old obstacles while anticipating future thorns and removing them too.

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Your boyfriend has broken up with you and you’re asking yourself and anyone that will listen, “How can I get my ex boyfriend back?” You have tried just about everything imaginable and focused all of your attention on trying to figure him out and how you can get him back but nothing seems to work.

You have tried to get him back by being nice to him, giving him his space, trying to talk about the problems and come up with a solution in order to get him back but he’s not budging. You have promised him the world and maybe even cried a little bit hoping that he would change his mind but his heart is a stone and you are worried that you will never be able to get him back.

The problem that you are running into is based upon relationship dynamics and right now the dynamics and the power in your relationship is very lopsided. Chances are the power in your relationship has been teetering towards your ex having all the power for some time and now with the breakup your ex boyfriend holds all the power and all the cards.

Let me explain. In a normal, healthy relationship both partners value and care for each other equally. Both partners want “in” and have respect for each other’s feelings, wants, needs and desires. This is probably how your relationship was in the beginning although at times you probably had periods where your ex boyfriend wanted you perhaps a little bit more than you wanted him and vice versa. It is almost impossible to keep the dynamic and power completely equal and this is normal in a relationship.

Something happened though and somehow things got out of whack. It could have been a single incident that causes this power shift or it could have been a slow change that has brought you to where you are today…you want your ex boyfriend but he doesn’t want you any more.

The truth is that he does still want you. It is the relationship dynamics that are messed up and the brutal truth is that everything that you have been doing to try to get him back is only making it worse. Every time you call him, text him, tell him that you still love him or make it known that you want to get back together with him is making it worse.

So, you understand now but your question is still unanswered and you still need to know, “How do I get my ex boyfriend back?” Well, the first step is to recognize the things that you are doing to make matters worse and promise yourself that you will refrain from exhibiting behaviors that are going to drive him even further away. Stop calling him, stop texting him and stop asking to meet with him so you can talk. All of these behaviors only make you appear weak and needy and boost his ego even further, which really could push him into the arms of another woman…but let’s not think about that right now.

The best thing that you can do is get control over your emotions and make a pact with yourself that you are only going to do those things that will lead to getting your ex boyfriend back. Only once you have allowed the dynamics of your relationship to even out and your boyfriend begins to feel attraction for you will you be successful in getting him back.

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