Should I Say Sorry To My Ex If I Want Him Back: Should I Apologize To My Ex Boyfriend After No Contact

Jasmine Norah
6 min readDec 22, 2019
Photo by Charlie Foster on Unsplash

Should I say sorry to my ex if I want him back — Should I apologize to my ex boyfriend after no contact.

If you’ve already been trying to get back your ex boyfriend you know that it’s not an easy task. Emotions are at an all time high right after a break up and both partners are likely feeling very different things. If your boyfriend dumped you, you’re experiencing a whole host of emotions right now. You’re feeling angry, confused and rejected. You’re bound to say and do things that you’ll later regret and that may damage your chances of reuniting with the man you adore. If you’re serious about pursuing a future with him, you need to get serious about your approach. There are actually words to win him back that can help you smooth the way for the two of you to not only get back together, but stay together too.

When you’re thinking about the best words to win him back you may believe that telling him that he’s the only man for you or sharing the fact that you can’t live without him, is the right thing to do. Those may have been the right things to say when you two were still together but now that a break up has occurred, you need to be more mindful of what you say. When a woman gets really emotional and starts telling her ex that she can never be happy without him, he doesn’t find that romantic at all. In fact, it actually has the opposite effect. When a woman pours her heart out to a man after they’ve split, he’ll label her as desperate and unstable. That’s why the right thing to say to him after you’ve broken up is that you’re okay with things and were considering taking a break from him too.

The key to winning back a man’s heart is making him feel the same rejection that you feel. No one can deal with rejection very well. It causes an immense amount of pain. By simply telling him that you’re accepting of the break up, you are actually rejecting him in much the same way he rejected you. Once you say it you need to follow through with it though and that means staying away from him. If you can find the strength to cut off all contact with him for a few weeks, you’ll actually be making him miss you. Be strong and resolute and stick to the idea that you’re okay with the break up. If you can do this, it won’t be long before he comes looking for you again.

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You have to admit that it makes it pretty difficult to get your boyfriend back if he won’t talk to you, don’t you think? You might want to talk things through or maybe you even have thought of apologizing but if your boyfriend isn’t communicating with you at all you might think that your relationship really is over.

Not to worry though. This is all very normal and his silence and passive aggressive behavior is pretty much par for the course when it comes to breakups. The good news is that there is an end to it and there are things that you can do to get him to communicate with you when the time is right.

That’s right. When the time is right and not a moment before you can re-initiate communication with your boyfriend as you do what is necessary to get him back. As tempting as it might be to want to call him every day in hopes of talking with him or texting him when you can’t sleep at night, you should avoid this temptation and take advantage of this time to get your emotions under control and learn what you can do to get your boyfriend back.

Playing the Waiting Game — Although it may go against your better judgment, spending some time apart and severing communication with your boyfriend for a period of time is the right thing to do. By doing so you will be able to settle your mind and think more clearly. This time will also give him the opportunity to begin to miss you a little bit or, if nothing else, begin to wonder what happened to you if you had been calling him often.

Take this time to build yourself back up and cultivate a positive mental picture of the two of you back together again. When doubt creeps in distract yourself by going out with friends or watching some mind numbing TV. Reading a book or exercising also works well at distracting you from those negative thoughts and can help you both mentally and physically.

Making Contact — This is where many women make the mistake and fall flat on their face when it comes to getting their boyfriend back. Your goal when you do make contact with your boyfriend again after the cooling off period should be to connect with him again. Many women make a request to sit down and talk about the relationship and getting back together.

Now, how many people like talking about problems, especially relationship problems? None that I know of. This is why your initial contact should be very positive, friendly and absolutely not about the relationship or getting back together. Keep this in mind.

Knowing What to Say — You may have heard that it’s not so much what you say as how you say it and during this delicate time it is vitally important that you are careful about what you say and how you say it. Avoid topics that could lead to talking about painful memories from your breakup and instead talk about happier memories that the two of you share.

If my some chance your boyfriend does bring up the topic of the breakup or what happened leading to the breakup, avoid accusing him of anything. Apologize for your part that led to the downfall of your relationship and begin to open up about your feelings of disappointment in failing him or hurting his feelings. But if at all possible you should avoid the topic of getting back together or your breakup with your ex until you have built at least a familiar friendship and restored the connection that you once shared.

With a little patience and understanding you can and will get your boyfriend back if this is the desire of your heart. No matter what happened that led to your breakup or what has happened since it is possible to get him back if you understand how men work in a relationship and what typically leads a man to want to get back together again.

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