Be the Calm, not the Chaos in your child’s game…
ALL day Matthew had been hitting his driver long and straight down the middle of the fairway — center cut. Now, stepping to the last hole of the 2020 World Championships, he could feel his adrenaline pumping. He looked out and saw trouble: water on the left and a bunker and rough on the right. So instead of driver he reached in his bag for 7 iron and flushed it down the middle, setting up a clean approach to the back pin.
Matthew’s opponent, Victor, had been playing well that day, too. He was sitting at -2, one behind Matthew. Victor followed suit with a 7 iron right down the middle, short of Matthew’s ball but perfectly placed. Victor stepped up and stroked his approach to the back of the green, leaving a 20 foot putt.
Matthew’s approach landed below the hole, 22 feet from the cup, setting up certain drama. Spectators surrounded the green, anticipating the upcoming putting contest. Being away, Matthew putts first. His ball rolls to 3 feet, which he confidently sinks. The pressure is back on Victor, who faces a difficult downhill birdie putt to force a playoff.
As Victor and his caddy look at the putt, there is a calmness about them. Even though the match is riding on what happens next, player and caddy are acting like it’s just another shot in the round. Victor’s caddy later admits that she didn’t tell her player that the putt he faced was an absolute must make. Rather, they went through their normal routine.
JUNIOR LESSON 1 — “Stay in the moment, take one shot at a time, don’t put more emphasis on any given shot but just go about your routine and what happens happens. You can’t control the outcome but you can control your approach to each shot with a routine and calmness.” — Adam Harrell (https://www.instagram.com/adamharrellgolf/)
Victor’s caddy NOT telling his player the importance of the putt, but keeping him in the moment, was just what the doctor ordered. The same had been the case for Matthew moments before. Coming down the stretch neither player was overwhelming himself with “what if” scenarios. They were just competing hard, one shot at a time, not getting ahead of themselves.
Now it’s time for Victor to putt. He lines it up, strokes it down the hill and BOOM, it hits the flagstick and drops in the cup. Birdie! Incredibly, here on the last hole,they are now tied. After 3 days of competition, they have hit the same number of shots. Off they go to a sudden death playoff to determine the champion.
Have I mentioned the players in this true story are 5 and 6 years old and on the final day of the US Kids Golf 3 day World Championships in Pinehurst, NC? Annually, this tournament sets the stage for the best players from around the globe to compete.
The lessons in this story, however, are applicable to golfers of all ages and skill levels. In particular, the caddies in this story did an incredible job of being the calm and not the chaos in their players’ games. They set the foundation for these wonderful junior athletes to do their thing and not be hindered by overcoaching and overanalysis when calm and confidence are the order of the day.
The goal of this post is to highlight the positive coaching and life long skills their caddies taught Matthew and Victor.
For example, flashback to the second to last hole, a tough uphill par 3. Matthew is very excited and thins his tee ball into the face of the front bunker. Victor calmly hits a wonderful shot to the back of the green.
Matthew is barely able to get the ball out of the sand, leaving a 50 foot putt from the fringe for par. Victor is sitting safely on the green and putting for birdie.
As he approaches his ball, Matthew is visibly upset, muttering “I’m gonna lose, I’m gonna lose”. He lines it up, rushing and clearly flustered.
JUNIOR LESSON 2 — “Be the calm in your child’s game, not the chaos” — Michelle Holmes (https://www.instagram.com/michelleholmesgolf/)
All Matthew’s caddy can do is slow him down, saying, “Listen buddy, you can and will still win this tournament. Let’s walk around and take a full look at this putt and do our routine.” By the time they get around to the other side of the flag Matthew is composed again. His caddy asks him what he thinks of the putt, Matthew says, “Little break, downhill then uphill. Caddy says, “Sounds good, go give it your best effort. That’s all you can do. You are the man!”
Then magic happens: https://www.instagram.com/p/CDY7aq8lPKq
The putt obviously was a combination of luck and skill, but his caddy’s “be the calm not the chaos” approach was deliberate and learned from Michelle Holmes (https://www.instagram.com/michelleholmesgolf/)
Now moving to the dramatic Matthew-Victor playoff, these two warriors march to the 1st tee. Both hit excellent drives and good 2nd shots. Matthew has a 22 foot uphill putt and Victor a 20 foot putt on a similar line.
Matthew strokes his putt, narrowly missing. He taps in for par.
Victor’s turn. Caddy and player go through their routine and line up the putt. Confidence is pouring out of this young man — looking on, the crowd can taste it. Victor pulls back his putter and strokes. The ball rolls toward the hole, end over end. The gallery is silent, bug-eyed in anticipation. It reaches the hole…
And…
JUNIOR LESSON 3 — “The results at this age are not correlated to future success. The goal at this age and junior sports in general is to grow a love for the game and not over emphasize individual or recent results. As a caddy/parent try not to get too involved in the results or the outcomes and understand the process and being in that moment with your child IS the reward.” — Jim Hardy (https://www.instagram.com/coach_jimhardy/)
Well, the truth of the matter is, it doesn’t matter whether the ball went in or not. Maybe Victor sank the birdie putt and won. Maybe he missesd the putt coming back and Matthew won. The more important lesson of the day: both of these incredible young men have learned a great deal about competition and confidence. That is WAY more important than winning.
So to figure out who won you will just have to dream about either scenario, because the truth is, it doesn’t matter.
Epilogue: After the match when things calmed down, Matthew and Victor spent an hour together, chipping and putting on the practice green. After all they’d been through, these little studs just wanted to hit more shots and bond and talk about kindergarten and 5/6 year old things like bugs and gum and who knows what. It was a spectacular ending to a week in which many lessons were learned and the love for the game of golf was firmly planted in these junior golfers, Matthew and Victor.
