Transgender 101

Before pressing on, I’d like to cover some transgender basics for those who are unfamiliar with what it means to be transgender and/or are unfamiliar with some of the terminology that is used within the trans* community.

• trans*: with an “*” is the umbrella term for anyone who does not identify as the gender assigned to them as birth. For what it’s worth, I’d contend that this is the majority of the human population.
• cisgender: is the umbrella term for anyone who *does* identify with the gender assigned to them as birth.
• gender dysphoria: is what I’ve personally struggled with since I was a baby. It is a mismatch between who you feel you are and who society/your body tells you you are. You can be gender dysphoric without realizing it for many, many years. You can also be gender dysphoric without identifying as transgender.
• ftm: oftentimes pronounced “f to m”, this stands for “female to male”
• mtf: oftentimes pronounced “m to f”, this stands for “male to female”
• testosterone hormone therapy: is taking regular doses of testosterone to produce masculinizing effects on the body (body hair, beard growth, fat redistribution, upper-body strength, and more). This is my first step!
• estrogen hormone therapy: is taking regular doses of estrogen to produce feminizing effects on the body (as a man who has lived in a dysphoric mature female body for many, many years, I cannot adequately identify the incredibly positive changes that happen here… [OPEN REQUEST FOR EDIT FROM MTF INDIVIDUALS]).

Three questions I’ve already encountered:

Q: What is it like going to the bathroom at work? (in the pre- and post-(?) COVID world)

A: (1) I don’t know, because I wasn’t able to use the men’s room before COVID hit but (2) I imagine awkward? Just because I’m a man doesn’t mean I can pee standing up. And I’m not the only man who cannot pee standing up…I believe we should be moving to gender- (and -able) inclusive/neutral bathrooms everywhere, hard stop.

Q: Can I still call you by your nickname?

A: In my case, for my nicknames “Jed”, “Jeds” or “Jedwards”, the answer is “Yes… so long as you use my pronouns.” This will vary for other transgender individuals, especially those that do *not* have gender-androgynous or trans-affirming nicknames. I think it is always okay to ask this question, so long as you (1) use your intuition (e.g. do not intuit that you can continue calling a trans-woman a nickname that is super masculine, or a trans-man a nickname that is super feminine… unless that trans*-person asks you to do so!) and (2) listen to and respect their answer. Always use their pronouns. Always.

Q: Do all transgender people end up surgically replacing their genitalia?

A: Some do and some don’t. The process of replacing a vagina with a penis when you’re ftm and replacing a penis with a vagina when you’re mtf is called “bottom surgery”. It’s a really, really advanced phase in a person’s transition, and there are reasons both within and without a trans* person’s control as to why they will or will not opt to pursue bottom surgery.

ℹ️ So you want to be an ally? Don’t ask about a trans* person’s genitalia (past, present, or future).

BTW: throughout my posts, I will be embedding several “So you want to be an ally?” tips (like above). Whether you identify as transgender or not, you can use these tips to identify, guide and correct intentional and unintentional transphobic or trans-exclusive behavior to become a better ally.

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P.S. I’m not expecting to get academic with my posts, so please recognize that I’m speaking from the narrow–and privileged–perspective of a White American who makes a good living and is transitioning to become a White heterosexual male. This is by no means a comprehensive assessment of the trans* landscape; it is a very high-level overview of my personal experience. As I learn and experience more, I will 100% be linking out to more inclusive resources. Click on these links.