Maggie Lalley – Medium

Maggie Lalley

Maggie Lalley

20 Something Woman On First Date Admits: I Foresee a Custody Battle

Fred is nice and all, but I have my doubts. It’s like, sure, he’ll GET the check at Red Lobster tonight (I suggested the place because I…

2 min readFeb 11, 2020

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20 Something Woman On First Date Admits: I Foresee a Custody Battle

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Maggie Lalley

Accidental New York Performance Art Pieces

a woman climbing a set of stairs with a cello on her back

1 min readSep 3, 2019

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Accidental New York Performance Art Pieces

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Maggie Lalley

Things I Did When I Found Out Santa Wasn’t Real

Got my first period

1 min readAug 27, 2019

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Things I Did When I Found Out Santa Wasn’t Real

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Maggie Lalley

7 Beautiful Haikus Plus A Poem I Wrote When I Was High AF

Pizza

2 min readAug 26, 2019

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7 Beautiful Haikus Plus A Poem I Wrote When I Was High AF

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Maggie Lalley

Things I’ve mistakenly brought up at parties

The face that I want to leave

3 min readAug 25, 2019

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Things I’ve mistakenly brought up at parties

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Maggie Lalley
in
Pickle Fork

Unpaid Acting Roles I’ve Said Yes To

39 year old blind mystery novelist in new York film academy student film

2 min readAug 23, 2019

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Unpaid Acting Roles I’ve Said Yes To

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Maggie Lalley
in
Slackjaw

Regular Shampoo Is OUT and Apple Cider Vinegar and Baking Soda Shampoo is IN

Because why smell like a garden when you can smell like a garden SALAD?

3 min readJul 2, 2019

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Regular Shampoo Is OUT and Apple Cider Vinegar and Baking Soda Shampoo is IN

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Maggie Lalley
in
Slackjaw

Manic Pixie Dream Girl vs. Medicated Pixie Dream Girl

Manic PDG: I stayed up all night last night and wrote thirty songs about wood nymphs for the ukelele. My one woman show is ready!

3 min readApr 26, 2019

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Manic Pixie Dream Girl vs. Medicated Pixie Dream Girl

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Maggie Lalley
in
Lady Pieces

This is Awkward…My IUD Just Followed Me On Instagram

Upon insertion, I was jazzed about getting an IUD! “You’ll love it,” said my gynecologist. “You’ll have lighter periods, manageable PMS…

4 min readFeb 25, 2019

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This is Awkward…My IUD Just Followed Me On Instagram

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Maggie Lalley
in
Slackjaw

Modern Alice in Wonderland Falls Down YouTube Rabbit Hole

Modern Alice doesn’t have the energy to fall down an actual hole, or the moxie required to trudge through a potentially exhausting land of…

4 min readJan 21, 2019

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Modern Alice in Wonderland Falls Down YouTube Rabbit Hole

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Maggie Lalley

Maggie Lalley

Comedian. @magslals on insta and Twitter The Belladonna Comedy, Little Old Lady, McSweeney’s, Pickle Fork, Lady Pieces, and The Junction.

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