How to Write When You’re Sad (or Stuck in Any Negative Mindset)
Sadness, anger, boredom, frustration.
These feelings aren’t necessarily negative. They are a part of the human condition. They are a part of life, a sign of life.
But they do cause discomfort, and often we let that discomfort distract us from writing.
We let our moods influence our work.
You can always write, even when you’re sad, mad, or anxious.
So, how do you get the writing done when all you want to do is curl up on the couch in sweats and binge-watch Netflix while finishing off that gallon tub of cheese puffs?
Roll off the couch, dust the orange powder from your hands, and boot up the computer. You’re sad. You are soooo not feeling it today. But you are still a professional writer.
You are going to get the writing done anyway.
Practice mindfulness.
First, remember that you are not this sadness. The real you is the awareness behind this sadness. The part of you that is conscious of your sadness.
The part of you that is able to remind yourself:
I am not this sadness. I am experiencing the discomfort of sadness.
That’s the real you. The awareness behind the thoughts and emotions.
That’s the part of you that knows you can experience any range of thoughts or emotions and still write.
Rather than being the thoughts and emotions, be the awareness behind them.
-Eckhart Tolle
Get still. Sit with whatever emotion arises. Allow it and accept it. Be present with it in the moment. Notice you are still alive, still in complete control of your actions, even with this emotion present.
Review your core life values.
I read a lot of books on personal growth. Tony Robbins offers a particular piece of advice in his book Awaken the Giant Within that has changed the course of my writing career: setting core life values.
Robbins encourages us to set clear life values. (Chapter 15 of Awaken the Giant Within explains life values and will guide you in setting your own.)
Writing a list of the core values I wish to move toward has enabled me to write no matter what mood I happen to be in, no matter what thoughts or emotions are churning in my brain.
Whenever I find myself distracted by an uncomfortable emotion, I read through my list of core values to remind myself what I am moving toward.
I remember that no matter what thoughts or emotions I happen to be experiencing, I can still take action to move toward my core values.
As an example, I will share a few of my core values.
Courage
I have the courage to make art, show my work, voice my ideas, to be vulnerable, to put myself out there, take risks, make mistakes, fail, endure the disappointment, devastation, and heartbreak that are inevitable in a fully-lived life. And then to put myself out there and try again.
Creativity
I continue to master the art of storytelling. I create stories; I write books that provide comfort and inspiration to readers in the same way books have provided for me my whole life.
Financial Abundance
I work to support and provide for myself and my family. I make money so that I can continue to make art. I thrive financially and build wealth by spending my money wisely on things and experiences I most value. I earn my wealth; I deserve my wealth. Wealth allows me to show my love and service in beautiful ways.
No matter what intense thoughts or emotions you are experiencing, know that you can still take action to move in the direction of your core values.
Allow the emotion to fuel your writing.
Use the emotion your are experiencing to inspire your writing. I have used this countless times in my own writing. Some of my best writing has been elevated by the intense emotion behind it.
We are humans with a vast range of emotions, and we can and will experience all of these emotions in the course of our lives. Life moves forward, whether you like it or not, with all modes of thought and emotion swirling in the background of your mind.
Stand up straight and realize who you are, that you tower over your circumstances.
-Maya Angelou
Understand that it is safe for you to have these feelings. You always have control over your actions. Emotions can’t hurt you. That can’t hurt anyone else. They are just life energy.
They are not you.
Remember you are more than the writing.
Writing is something you do — it is not who you are. You are allowed to be a human with all the ups and downs, sadness and grief, joy and elation that the human existence entails.
Remember you are a whole person. You are more than the writing you do. It helps to try a little magic, a little mysticism. Allow yourself to be spiritual.
Realize you are a part of a greater system of life and energy in existence. Big picture, the writing you do today (or don’t do) will have only a small impact in the universe.
Take some comfort in that.
Let your insignificance let you off the hook a little bit. If the writing today isn’t your best, there’s always tomorrow.
Peace is waiting behind the tumult of your transient thoughts and emotions.
Take a moment to find that peace…
Now, go and write in that peace.
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