You’ve Been Miserable for a While and It’s No Fun. Here’s How to Get Happy and Stay That Way.

Our inherent nature is to be happy and joyful, but life sometimes gets in the way. Sometimes we’re able to respond well to challenges. At other times the dark side of life creeps up on us before we even realize it. And we get affected negatively. But even though you’ve been miserable and it’s no fun, you can get happy and stay that way.

Misery and joylessness are signals that the dark side of life has cloaked us.

Yes, it’s like we’re wearing a heavy dark cloak we’d like to get out from under but how?

The first key is wanting to be happy again. Now we can do something about it.

I’m not a psychologist so I’ll speak to my own experience with this. Maybe real life experience is more powerful than what a credentialed person says anyway.

I was part of a spiritual group of people. I was pretty happy for a long time, but then the dynamics of the group changed. Rules, dogmas and judgment got established as the norm for participation.

I felt less and less free to be myself. I cried a lot of tears because I felt torn between staying and leaving. I wanted to do the right thing and stay (according to the rules) but I so badly wanted to leave and be free.

The more I ‘bucked the system’ the more the others saw me as rocking the boat. They saw me as detrimental to the group’s unity.

I had always been a ‘team player.’ I truly gave being in this group my all and then some and I have no regrets about that. I just came to the point of feeling utterly stifled.

I began not showing up here and there and the leaders didn’t like it. I just couldn’t subject myself to their rigid strictures any longer. It was killing me. And I wanted to be happy again.

Misery and unhappiness are signs you don’t feel free.

Unhappiness often means there’s a conflict within you. You’re going against your personal integrity. You’re compromising yourself and who you are.

For many reasons, relationships of all kinds may lead us to misery. This happens if we don’t have a healthy sense of self and personal integrity.

Maybe your experience in a one-on-one relationship, a family, a work force, or a community is dampening your Spirit.

It’s important to maintain your sense of self. But if you don’t have it or lose it, you can most definitely build it or get it back.

Maybe you’ve even been seeking approval from others like I did. That goes against your personal integrity too because it’s not honest.

As you seek approval from others you lose yourself. You compromise yourself every time you seek the approval of another. You’re tap dancing to the tune that other people play for you. I know this only too well.

In the name of being a good participant according to other peoples’ definition, you allow your Spirit to be dampened.

Better to think what you really think, say what you really want to say and be who you are. Do this no matter how bad you think it looks.

For your own sake, it’s better to be real than to be fake presenting yourself as something other.

Or maybe you get your worth from the things you do for others.

Have you looked at your real motivation for the good deeds you do? It took me several years but I finally gave it an honest look. And while I love to serve others, I often derived a sense of self-worth from serving.

And giving and serving should be selfless. We mustn’t seek a personal payoff for our good deeds. Give simply to give.

Compromises to our personal integrity like these shroud our sense of joy.

Ultimately, both soul and Spirit can never abide compromises and inauthenticity like these. And so you feel a conflict and that inner conflict makes you terribly unhappy.

Like a bird, your Spirit is always going to want to fly. If you can’t fly, be free and be real, you’re going to be unhappy.

This unhappiness begins to affect you in other ways too. Now the lens you see life through is constantly dirty. Almost nothing looks good to you and because of negative thinking you start creating more bad stuff. Now you find yourself in a sort of spiral of things gone wrong.

And all you know is you want to be happy.

But if you don’t do something soon, your emotional and mental misery will morph into physical sickness. Now there’s another motivator for turning your unhappiness around.

So what do you do to turn it all around?

Detach from the negative influences of controlling people. If you’re in a dogmatic or domineering relationship or group, don’t try to be a saint. Get out.

Better to be alone for awhile so you can collect and return to yourself without chaos all around you. You’re going to love it actually.

Remove other negative influences, too. These include a lot of what’s on television and in the news.

What goes into the mind comes out in your life. No matter how bad the news is or how much you agree that it’s bad, guess what? If you opt out, the world will still carry on and thrive. Somehow the world has a way of doing that. It’s never really the “end of the world.”

Look at your environment. Look at what you’ve allowed to surround you and make upgrades. This includes creating a structure and routine that speak to and nurture you.

Truth and honesty are always simple. It’s about simple yet powerful things like these:

1) Appreciate every little thing. I can’t stress enough how big this one is. If you did nothing other than appreciate every little thing, chances are extremely good you’ll get happy. At first, this may be an exercise you have to almost force.

• Find things everywhere to appreciate and acknowledge with deep gratitude: the butterfly, the breeze, the church bell ringing, the droplets of rain, the child squealing with delight, the smile of an elderly person, your fine dinner, your cup of cappuccino.
• Eventually, this practice will take on a life of its own and you’ll never have to force it. Instead, you’ll not only appreciate all of life, you’ll be happy!

2) Meditate. Every. Single. Day. This one is right up there with #1 above. I know you keep reading to meditate everywhere. But there are enormously valid reasons.

• Even if only for 15 minutes a day, do meditate. Meditation brings balance to your life. It creates a sense of evenness and serenity. You’ll even receive divine guidance.
• Make meditation a priority. At first, it may be challenging if meditation’s new for you.
• Just get comfortable, still and quiet. When thoughts come up, don’t be upset. Let them go in and out without judgment or strain. After several minutes, your mind will quiet down and you will hear the voice of God within you. And how awesome is that?!

3) Get your body moving. Walking several steps a day in nature is really all you need to do. An added exercise program is even better. But walking is fundamental and will do incredible good for your body, mind and Spirit. It moves the vital energy flowing through your body. When you have circulating energy, you just feel better all around.

4) Nature is generous in its giving. The trees and other flora give us energy. So do animals. Put yourself in nature settings, breathe them in and listen to what they have to say to you.

• If you feel down, step outside even if just in your neighborhood. There should be enough nature there to lift you up immediately.
• Allow nature to do what it does best and give life and joy to you.

5) Choose books to read that uplift you because they offer answers to your life’s questions. These will be high spiritual books. I surround myself with them. I don’t just read them, I study them.

6) Be curious about constantly learning new things. This keeps the energy flowing and growing in your life. It keeps you out of stagnancy.

7) Cut out the chaotic clutter in your home environment. Pare down. Create a zen-like atmosphere.

• Bring more beauty into your life that you can truly appreciate.
• I have an art canvas on my bedroom wall that says: “She designed a life she loved.” I put it up there about a year before I started really taking matters in hand. And I truly believe that by constantly seeing this message, I was supported to make the shift to joy and happiness.
• Such practices will truly sustain your Spirit.

8) When we compromise our personal integrity we allow tears and holes to open in our aura. So clear your aura — the electromagnetic field that vibrates around your body.

• Smudge it with sage, ring a tinkle bell inside your aura, or beat a drum softly. Intend your auric field is clear. Visualize light filling any rips or tears you sense in your field.

9) Nourish yourself with more high spectrum living foods. This will probably work itself out though once you begin moving into more joyful living. It won’t be an effort but something you just want to do.

• It really is more about what we consume in the mind than in the body. But eating well will strengthen your body and support you in your quest for happiness.

10) Guard your mind. Stop the practice of dwelling on the past.

• I talk about this critical subject here on Medium.
• You can’t create anything you desire in the past or the future. It can only happen in the present moment.
• It’s understandable how memories come up constantly. We’ve all been programmed to dredge up the past all day long. We find our worth in it.
• But you’ve got to commit to shutting the door on the past. You’ve learned from it. Now move on.
• The past doesn’t just happen without your allowing it.
• Be prepared with a new present moment thought whenever a past memory comes up.
• It’s important to understand that memories are just that — memories. We think we’re thinking when we toy with memories in our heads, but they’re not actually thoughts.
• Shutting the door to the past is a new habit you must form. It might take you several weeks or months but it’s a golden habit so worth developing.

11) Don’t let other people drag you back into the past. Misery loves company and they’re miserable in their past dwelling too. They haven’t yet realized they’re running on programs embedded in their computer brains’ frontal lobes.

• Be prepared with what to say when someone wants to pull you back there: “I am recreating my life and I can’t do that in the past. I’m happier now living and creating in the present. If you can’t speak in the present tense with me, we’ll have to sign off this conversation.”
• Don’t worry if the other person’s offended. This is your life we’re talking about. Besides, you just may plant a valuable seed in the other person’s mind. But don’t preach it. Just do it yourself. You don’t have to save the world, just yourself.

Here Is Your New Focus.

Focus on appreciation, happiness and joy in your life and being and these will grow. Do this without trying too hard. Be at ease with it all. Revel in it.

Get yourself out of the box you’ve allowed yourself to get stuck and live miserably in. Open your world. Be the Spirit you are.

You don’t have to create a busy schedule of things to do. That would be superficial and not a cure. Just practice the simple things in life that I enumerated above.

Rediscover yourself. Know yourself. There’s someone to love and appreciate there. Focus on that.

Joy, happiness and freedom are your essential nature!

Purusha Radha
Starseed, time traveler, writer
Site: https://bio.site/stargatesbeckon
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