The Power of Patience: Why I Choose To Be a Turtle
The Hare and the Tortoise is a fable with the thought-provoking message: slow and steady wins the race.
But it’s hard to apply that philosophy. Why?
Because life is unpredictable. Life has an expiration date. So we tell ourselves: “I should make the most out of my twenties”, or “I have to chase my dreams now or it’ll be too late”.
This creates a sense of urgency, a fear of “what ifs” and “should haves”. Basically, a FOMO on life.
And so we rush.
My Experience With Over-Precipitation
I was twenty when I first discovered the world of personal development.
My motivation hit the roof: I was ready to embark on a journey of better health, better work, and better confidence. Little did I know that I used self-help to heal my inner shame. The shame of not being good enough.
Eventually, I needed fast results so I did just that:
Everything was fine for a few days.
And then…
What happened?
I couldn’t keep up with my habits and thought it was a me-issue.
I was not disciplined enough. Not motivated enough. Not brave enough.
So I tried going up again, using the same rabbit technique. I said to myself: This time, I won’t give up! But I did every time. Without knowing it, I started creating a pathway towards the rock bottom of despair.
Indeed, the more I tried getting back on track, the less hope I had.
Each time I failed, I kinda knew it would happen. This went on for months and years, until I asked myself: “What have you been doing this whole time?!”.
I was disappointed at myself, but not surprised.
Then I Learned About This Thing Called ‘Homeostasis’
Your body temperature. Your blood pressure. Your defense against infections. These are all examples of homeostasis.
In broad terms, it’s designed to maintain equilibrium.
If there’s any change happening (suppose you get high temperature), your body will do everything it can to go back to normal.
Now, if you look further into your life, you’ll discover the same effect:
- You get unusually happy/sad/angry for one day. Then the next week or month, you’re likely to return to your neutral state.
- You go on vacation. You might feel like a brand new person. Then you get back home and slowly, your old habits start kicking in.
Case in point: Homeostasis is like a rubber band. No matter where you move, it will keep you in place because it cares for your safety.
So if you want fast results, that’s a huge red alarm for homeostasis.
The quicker you run, the quicker you’ll be pulled back to square one.
Learn How to Walk Before You Learn How to Run
Baby steps, as some say.
And in some cases (like when you hit the rock bottom of despair), you’ll need to learn how to crawl before you learn how to walk.
Most of our current skills had slow beginnings.
Let’s take reading as an example.
You’re able to look at weird symbols and get meaning from them? Pretty cool skill.
You probably dedicated months of your life learning the alphabet. Spelling words. Reciting texts. And only then, reading became second nature.
Whatever habit you want to integrate, your system will need to adapt. It might take years until your homeostasis finally understands and says: “Okay, so that’s the new normal!”.
That’s why we need patience.
You’re Already in the Future
Often, we associate patience with the act of waiting.
Just wait a bit more…You’re nearly there.
While it can be rewarding to look afar, towards the future, you might also realize that you’re already living in the future.
If the finish line is too far away and you can’t see it yet, you might as well pretend that each small step you make is a finish line.
A tiny habit that takes 30 days means you’re going to cross 30 finish lines.
And for the slow and steady tortoise, that is more than enough.
