Welcome to The Bill Mullane Show!
If you look at my profile, you’ll see I only have five or six blogs here on Medium, the last of which — “Don’t Feed the Megalodons” — was published back in March.
Just glance down the titles and you’ll notice that everything I have written here can be umbrellaed under the ever-enigmatic term, “nonsense.”
Oh sure, a few of them flow together (sort of), talking all about alien wars, polarity, and the most conveniently-broad arch for a blogger with no goddamn idea what he wants to write about, “existence.” But by and large, there is no general topic or “niche.”
The first blog, cloaked under the guise of single-parenting, operates more like an introduction to the life of a guy nobody gives a shit about. Then, I babble about the extraterrestrial battles between light and dark energies that nobody gives a shit about. Finally, a company I did some freelance writing work for tanked due to Google’s SEO updates, and a bunch of very nice people lost a job they loved, so I took it upon myself to write an inspirational blog that nobody gives a shit about.
Why, that’s it! … Finally!
It hit me like a brick. Nobody gives a shit! Hell, I don’t give a shit. So, where do I go from here?
To me, the fact that nobody cares means ultimate freedom, but so much more. It’s like an ocean of purified ice water for an unquenchable thirst to be myself. Personally, I believe it’s the long-anticipated acceptance of myself for being the mindlessly artistic, sporadically morose, irritated, overly nostalgic clown that I am.
It also means that I have finally, after so much questioning, stress, and bouncing from interest to interest —passion to passion —over and over, found my “niche.” And that niche is essentially “whatever the fuck I want it to be.”
Welcome to The Bill Mullane Show!
About 13 years ago, while surfing conspiracy theories on the internet, I discovered channeling. The entity coming through the channel spoke about concepts like parallel realities, moving into 5th Density, and God —the latter of which it referred to as “All That Is.”
Generally, it sounded like a lot of Buddhist ideology crossed with quantum physics. The subject almost immediately resonated with me, mostly because about 21 years ago, I had my first out-of-body experience.
The experience came during a psychedelic mushroom trip on a beach nestled into a mountain, and it had a profound effect on my psyche.
As someone raised under the Catholic teachings of “life is a big fucking test and if you fail it, you’re going to burn in hell — there will be no end to your suffering and torture,” discovering that I am truly so much more than my current incarnation was tantalizing.
Anyway…
My innate interest in ethereal structures compelled me to dig deeper into this specific rabbit hole, and ultimately, I heard the entity speaking with someone who wanted to quit smoking cigarettes.
The entity spoke about how the only moment is NOW, and if you truly understand that, then you can understand that both the past and the future are illusions and that we create these illusions from the only moment there is — NOW.
So, if you understand that, then you can understand that in every moment, you are a new/different person. And if you are a new/different person, then you must have a new/different past.
So, to quit smoking, all you need to do is remember who you were before you ever started smoking. Then, the moment you do that, realize that you are NOW a person who never smoked in the first place.
Phew… I hope I explained that clearly.
Either way, the point is I had a revelation with that message. So much so, I could vividly feel the once-healthy, hyper, and happy kid I used to be, and I actually sat in front of my computer and cried like a little sissy puss; an action I now realize was my body washing out the chemicals of a negative belief.
After that, I became infatuated with this particular messenger. And while the entity spoke a lot about physics, different dimensions, and the mechanics of the universe, the core message was one commonly found in Eastern philosophies and “New Age” religions.
Simply put, the concept is to “follow your excitement.” The entity takes this concept further, explaining how and why it works. This has to do with the energy/frequency of excitement being your physical body’s translation of your true natural/spirit state. Nevertheless, the message is essentially, “Follow your excitement with no insistence on an outcome.”
I started doing this (in increments) about 12 years ago, and it led me to quit stone construction and take college courses in Creative Writing. This decision was initially met with many “harsh” situations that just so happened to coincide with surprise parenthood.
Fast-forward and I have been a single father, writer, and editor for about eight years NOW. However, after living life, raising a kid, making money, “losing” a lucrative job, and masturbating with my lonely adult-deprived tears for close to a decade, I was finding myself again, drawn to the message, stronger than ever before.
I quit drinking alcohol and began much more frequent, deeper meditations. As if driven by something outside of me, I kept feeling magnetically dragged inward, ever deeper into remembering my natural/spirit state.
There is so much more to this physical life than running in circles, apparently dominated by a faceless, puppeteer-style government, fighting to make paper symbols and digital flickers by doing shit we don’t want to do 85% of the time we are here.
What are you saving for retirement? I’m saving a big, fat, kiss and a fuck you, buddio.
Or, perhaps a bit more eloquently, I’m planning to retire happy, just as I am choosing to live NOW.
In doing so, I have been drawn — again — to follow my excitement. And this was where I sat for a while, trying to decide…
I have been unhealthily obsessed with music my entire life. I play guitar, drums, and vocals (none incredibly well, but I do them). I am a writer. I enjoy writing horror and comedy as much as metaphysical essays.
Sometimes I’m drawn to scriptwriting, sometimes prose, sometimes song. And as odd or narcissistic as it might sound, I love to talk. Whether comedically or philosophically, I love the art of conversation and likely nothing more than a long night of deep talk over coffee.
Moreover, I love finding strange, challenging, puzzling ways to record these conversations, songs, plays, skits, etc. And so that’s where I’m at…
I’m a near-40, single father, writer, musician, and clown, following his passion for recording things in weird, funny, catchy, profane, and thought-provoking ways. I perform and record what interests me and what I think people might find, in some way, at least moderately beneficial.
This once-weekly (Friday nights at 10 p.m. EST) 30-minute-ish “podcast” is a look inside the creative process as I write, perform, and record everything the week I release it; which also means that the quality is often on the “raw” side.
Each episode typically consists of some comedy/discussion, at least one original song, a skit or two, a five-minute guided meditation, and a short story (nonfiction or fiction). However, these are very loose guidelines and I thoroughly enjoy mixing in the unexpected.
I’m also an NFL geek and a lifelong, die-hard member of Bills Mafia, and have written several pieces as a “Buffalo Bills beat writer” for a couple of online publications. A close friend and I will be adding a Bills/NFL discussion/comedy portion to the show during the season.
Also, this October, I will be performing original audio horror stories with my fellow writer and biological brother, and there is much, much more to come!
I have decided to use my Medium account to provide writing for any fans of my work who might want more. But also, I think this could be a great place to maybe write on a subject each week that I can then use or expand on for topics/discussions on the show.
So, at least for NOW, I plan to post a new blog right here every Tuesday morning… ish.
In closing, I don’t know exactly what all of this is, but in that way, it’s a perfect reflection of my reality.
If — on any level — you resonate with me and what I have written here, and you feel like an avant-garde amalgamation of dark humor, experimental music, and optimistic mindfulness, then I implore you to listen and hope you enjoy.
Welcome to The Bill Mullane Show!
As of this writing, The Bill Mullane Show is recording episode 11. Please feel free to go back and listen to previous episodes available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, Amazon Music, Audible, and Castbox.
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*Please understand*
The Bill Mullane Show is still very young and I don’t have podcast equipment or a studio. I record mostly in my home office, so I have set up a Patreon page for donations of $5.00/month. If you enjoy the show and would like to hear it get better and better, please consider becoming a member here.
The show will always remain free. Donations are for the goal of freeing up hours so I can do this full-time and invest in equipment to improve the quality of the content. However, Patreon members will eventually have exclusive access to additional content such as NFL (DFL) podcasts, horror/comedy narrations/plays, extra music, and more.
Thank you for reading.
See you Tuesday!
