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After Careful Thought and Consideration I Decided to Disclose My Greatest Secret
Feel free to make fun of me in the comments, since it’s kind of lame
Be patient dear reader, I’m not going to disclose my secret from the first paragraph. I mean I had to tease you and make you wonder what on Terra those guys have to do with me, right?
Who are they? And why do they look like they’re suffering from chronic constipation? Why so serious? Did their pet die? Of both?
My ‘greatest secret’ can be found relatively easy in the Greek-speaking domains of the web, so it’s not exactly a secret. I looked it up in English though and both The Duck and Google do not spill the beans on their first page.
You need to look deeper and know exactly what to look for to find out, which no one ever does. So it’s technically still a secret internationally. But I feel you’re losing patience with my rambling so I’ll spit it out:
I am royalty.
There, I said it. Wait, if I’m fracking royalty why do I write for peanuts instead of chilling at my castle with my butler — none less than someone like Anthony Hopkins’ Mr Stevens in Remains of a Day— fanning my…
