Why Most Relationships Fail: How you can Co-Create More Fulfilling Passionate Relationships.
“Love is I went to God, just to see, and I saw her reflected, in front of my Eyes!” — Jason Silva
There are two types of romantic connection:
1. Hormones and the Ego’s programing fitting each other. This is why they say in psychology that we tend to fall in love with our own mothers and fathers (that is, those who resemble our own mothers and fathers.)
We come together as wound-mates to bring up these wounds for healing. We don’t realize that this is the purpose of this kind of relationship. So we fight and we break-up.
This type of relationship eventually becomes un-fulfilling no matter how ‘passionate’.
Unfortunately, it’s what most intimate relationships tend to be.
2. There is the kind that is the same as the Awakening experience. What’s happening is that for a split-second, you’re seeing the True Self of another person. This Self is even more beautiful than you ever thought it was!
Watch the quick video below to have a deeper understanding of how deeply moving and profound such a moment can be!
When we have such a deeply moving experience of another, that also triggers a deeply moving experience of ourselves! We realize not only how beautiful another is but also how beautiful we are! And indeed, how beautiful this very moment is!
Because the Beauty we see in the outside world is really a reflection of our Inner Beauty. Because we can’t even see Beauty externally if we don’t have something to relate to inside!
I have an extensive video about this on my Youtube channel called “Is the Romantic Love experience the same as the Awakening experience?”
Watch it below:
Heart-Virtue-Alignment
One crucial thing I notice about this second kind is also that often our Heart Virtues align.
Your Heart Virtue is the Unique Energy Signature of your Heart, your Heart-Print, what you were born for and what you’re willing to die for. It’s therefore the one thing that is completely non-negotiable and completely unavailable to manipulation.
It is also what gives you the deepest level of fulfillment and the kind of moments that is described in the video above on “We don’t cry because we are sad when we see a beautiful scene in a movie. We cry because something is even more beautiful than we thought it was!”
The power of knowing your Heart-Virtue is that these beautiful moments don’t have to be accidents any more: you can build your life around it!
Here is the thing: there are many kinds of Love, but the main ones are:
1. Platonic Love (between friends)
2. Familia (love for siblings, parents and relatives)
3. Agape Love (a spiritual Love for everyone on the planet)
4. Eros (Sexual/Romantic/Erotic Love)
Out of all these kinds of love, Eros is the only kind of Love that is very specific (This is true even for poly-amorous people with multiple love interests: it’s still very specific).
You’re specifically loving the Unique Individuality of another. And that Unique Individuality is their Heart Virtue.
I believe what’s actually happening is that Heart Virtues are aligning and falling in love with each other.
So, here are the steps for a more passionate relationship:
1. Get a coach to unlock your Heart Virtue and theirs. I am such a coach! So I can do that for you! Message me on Facebook for more info!
2. Discover the ways your Heart Virtues align. I have developed a Guided Meditation for doing just that. In fact, I use it to make sure that my own Heart-Virtue aligns with those of my prospects because I don’t take everybody as a client these days: only those who are committed to not only knowing their Heart-Virtue but actually living it!
3. Discover the Third Heart Virtue that is the sum of your Heart Virtues.
Here is an example of Heart-Virtue-Alignment:
My Heart Virtue is that I am committed to experiencing Divinity, sharing Awakening, and bringing Sovereignty back to all beings, now and forever!
I used to see a woman whose Heart-Virtue is that she is committed to the Full Experience of the Now every moment.
And so whenever I am around her, I am more present. And presence is key to living an Awakened Life. And so, that’s how she helps me live my Heart-Virtue.
And whenever she is around me, she lives less from her programming and more from her Awakened state. This enables her to be more present and thus live the full experience of the Now!
A short course on Masculine-Feminine Dynamics.
Other steps are also important such as:
1.The man adopts a lifestyle of providing emotional stability to the feminine in everyone in his life, not just his love interest.
The picture below and the caption that came with it is a great example:
I originally saw this on Pinterest. The caption that came with it said:
““Everything will be ok,” you say as you kiss my forehead. And I know everything will be ok because you are with me.”
If ever there was a great portrayal of the masculine providing emotional stability to the feminine, and the feminine trust, safety, stability and relaxation in response, this is it! So beautiful!
Also see the picture below:
Watch the video below for more great examples (and ways to provide the feminine with Masculine Emotional Stabilty):
(And then the next step is to inspire all women with beautiful emotions. In fact, a man inspiring a woman with beautiful emotions is literally the equivalent of the woman inspiring a man with a hard-on that expands beyond the physical erection to his entire body and being, which then powers his Life Purpose and Heart-Virtue.)
2. The woman adopts a lifestyle of blessing everyone in her life with her beautiful emotions and creative energy.
A man is attracted to a woman, not so much for her Beauty, but her feelings and emotions. But her feelings and emotions ARE her Beauty. I remember the first time I realized this so clearly and tuned into this deeply.
I was at a coffee house. I looked at all the women with this sense of feeling their emotions and appreciating them. Suddenly, every woman became amazingly beautiful in my eyes, each one uniquely beautiful. Even women who I normally wasn’t attracted to, that aren’t really my ‘type’ became so beautiful. It was as if I could see their emotions, not just feel them. And it was like: WOW!
And one night months later, I saw the beauty of women’s emotions on a deeper, more spectacular level!
I went swing dancing.
And in the middle of dancing, I started seeing women’s emotions in color. Not only color, but also shapes!
For example, I saw one woman’s emotions as birds coming from her Heart into my Heart.
Another came in as stars.
Another as butterflies.
And yet another woman wrapped me in a living pillar of Light!
Not only that: my connection with the women was electric! And so much fun!
And almost every woman said to me: “Thank you so much! That was so awesome!” and also “Thank you so much! It was such a pleasure!”
That night, I felt the happiest I had ever felt!
I felt so complete.
I felt that I could die and have no regrets.
I talk about it more in this video below:
Watch the video below for great examples of women blessing men with the Beauty of their Emotions:
For me, the Feminine is like the airplane. It wants to fly.
The Masculine is like the Air-Traffic Controller, providing the landing-space and the direction for the feminine to land whenever it wants to, so that it can be free to fly!
We need both.
Because we need the airplane to go from one place to another.
And we need the landing-space to land.
Without the feminine, we cannot fly. Without the masculine, we cannot land.
This is why I chose the acro-yoga picture at the beginning of this article.
(Another great metaphor is that the Masculine is a Prism, and the Feminine is a Rainbow. But that is a deeper metaphor I’d reserve for another article or a live workshop).
One More Vital Step
Amazing passionate truly fulfilling relationships are often inside a vibrational container that is bigger than us that moves us, encourages us, fulfills us, inspires us and uplifts us!
There is a commitment to bringing about the more beautiful world our Heart-Virtues know is possible.
For more on Heart Virtues, watch this video:
And for more about what I am talking about in this article, watch Michelle Terrell interviewing me about Heart-Virtues and the Speed of Trust:
If you would like to know your Heart-Virtue, start by getting your Heart-Virtue Prep-pack course here.
About the Author Kundan Chhabra:
Kundan Chhabra provides Emotional Alchemy, which is the art of transforming your Emotional Pain into fuel for your Passion and Life Purpose
He does this via “Breakthrough Awakening”, the ground-breaking Consciousness Technology he invented. He created this technology after making the incredible discovery that there are actually 6 Levels of Knowing Yourself.
He also created the revolutionary relationship model that he calls “the Museship”.
It was his own pain and struggle with depression, suicidal thoughts and bad relationships that led him to these discoveries and inventions.
He also created the course, “7 Keys to Resolve Conflicts in Relationships”, published on the DailyOm platform, which has 1.2 million subscribers.
Kundan also recently started a project called “My Surrender Experiment: 30 Days of Surrender: Creativity in Service of Life!”.
He is teaching a workshop on September 13th, 2015 in Irvine on “How to Get Over Bad Boys, Nice Guys and Female Drama”
He is committed to fully living his Heart-Virtue of “Divinity, Awakening and Sovereignty”.
He also helps you unlock your Heart-Virtue, which is the Unique Energy Signature of your Heart, your Heart-Print, what you were born for and what you’re willing to die for. It’s therefore the one thing that is completely non-negotiable and completely unavailable to manipulation. It is also what gives you the deepest level of fulfillment and the kind of moments that is described in the following video. The power of knowing your Heart-Virtue is that these beautiful moments don’t have to be accidents any more: you can build your life around it!
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