The Growing Number of Stay-At-Home Dads: Lazy or Brave?
A 24-hour job with no clocking out.
The modern world is redefining social expectations and norms around parenting.
The stigma and stereotype around stay-at-home dads are destructive and uncivilized. People end up questioning their masculinity and work ethic, portraying them as lazy, oblivious, and puny.
According to the Pew Research Center, an estimated 2.1 million fathers were stay-at-home dads in 2021 — up 8% since 1989.
Is It OK To Be A Stay-at-Home Dad?
Every marriage and relationship is different. The world is changing and so are parenting and gender role dynamics.
Male involvement in bringing up children is not only beneficial to society but to the child’s upbringing as well.
Traditionally, men brought home the ‘butter’ while women took care of family responsibilities.
However, more men are speaking out about their desire and dream to bond with their children rather than spend years climbing the corporate ladder.
If it sails your boat, well and good.
Two Key Reasons Why a Stay-Home Dad Has the Hardest Job
1. They rarely get any breaks.
Each moment is spent doing chores around the house or setting up doctors’ or school appointments.
They end up multi-tasking while ensuring the kids are out of harm’s way in whatever game they decide to engage themselves in.
- Cooking, cleaning, and changing diapers regularly.
- Bathing the kids, preparing all their meals and their wives’ work meals, laundry, and finishing up assignments with them is a whole load of tasks.
Just to shed light on a few of their responsibilities.
The routine may leave one feeling burned out, overwhelmed, and stressed.
To wake up and repeat the same process all over again is a road less traveled even by ‘natural caregivers’ (women).
2. No monthly financial compensation or health benefits
It’s a blessing to find a partner that appreciates and acknowledges your input. The ‘breadwinner’ in this case may decide to compensate their partner by offering a generous paycheck under their agreement.
Successful and healthy relationships tend to have couples that openly discuss their career goals and parenting aspirations.
Laying all cards on the table enables each partner to give a 100% to a responsibility that they willingly suggested and assigned themselves.
Becoming a stay-at-home dad by default (such as losing a job or your wife out-earning you) may cause friction in most relationships.
Couples need to consider and weigh relationship expectations and reality before moving in together.
We can’t grumble about absentee fathers and shame men who are actively pursuing the role of a present father in their child’s life.
There’s nothing wrong with being a stay-at-home dad. It’s a tough job that requires selflessness, patience, and hard work.
Being a stay-at-home parent is the MOST demanding job.
Let’s not even talk about the mental physical and emotional strength and capacity it requires.
People who’ve never raised kids will argue relentlessly that it’s an easy task but that’s far from the truth. Despite the false accusations, their dedication and work often lies unseen.
Many women take pride as stay-at-home mothers. Why can’t we extend the same grace to men?
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