It’s the Most Wonderful Onboarding of the Year!

SLictionary (Structured Linguistics LLC)

Published in

Coinmonks

6 min readJan 5, 2023

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There’ll be words for bountying
Word$miths for creating
And no fees to be paying
There’ll be email-only onboarding
And new BSV wallets for talented winners only…
It’s the hap-happiest onboarding of them all!

Christmas and New Year holidays are over, and yet today begins the hap-happiest year of them all. This is the year BitCoin can onboard muggles [0: definition below] without needing them to go thru the rigorous process of obtaining BSV tokens. All the muggles will need, is a faint interest in words and competitive spirit! Why? SLictionary’s Word Bounty contests are now open for all people of the world, BSV-free. The only “onboarding” required, is if a talented person WINS. Then and only then will they need to get a BSV wallet, and unlike legacy onboarding this time, like Santa’s surprising gifts under the tree, THE WALLET WILL HAVE MONEY ALREADY IN IT!

We at SLictionary.com call this “reverse onboarding”; it’s 🥕 not 🥢.

A long time ago, I was walking thru the streets of Rosarito Mexico, and many shop owners tried to get our obvious tourist (muggles) group to enter their stores and overpay for cheap goods — a quite common scene for the Gringo in Meh-hee-co. One clever shop owner impressed me — the owner of a rug store. His store was the last store I’d ever enter as a single 25 year old, and yet it was the only store I entered that day. Why? The clever man outside overheard our group’s conversation, which was “where’s Lee?”. In his finest Engrish, he said “Lee came in here” and pointed inside his store. So a group of a half dozen muggles walked in, looking for the “bounty” which was our friend Lee. Lee wasn’t in there, the clever man had tricked us, but one of the girl’s in our group ended up negotiating for a small floral rug for her Santa Monica apartment. This story inspired us to come up with a better way to onboard muggles (again, look up muggle, I’ll make it easy for you: https://www.slictionary.com/seek/muggle ), with carrot instead of stick.

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Another quick story, during a meeting with Mr Ager-Hanssen he mentioned how BitCoiners need to have pride in their wisdom and dispense it ONLY to those who are worthy. In old Wall Street parlance, this was known as “firing the customer” if the customer created more trouble than he was worth. Christen understands this concept, that we don’t need to sell to those who won’t understand, but only to those who LEAD and possess discernment and forward-thinking judgement. We took this to heart as well, and we quickly designed the world’s best BitCoin [ticker: BSV] onboarding program based on these two storied concepts. In short, we dangle a healthy reward to newcomers instead of asking them to jump thru hoops; BUT but BUT, we also ask them to prove worthiness by displaying their talents in a feat of artistic, poetically intellectual strength [3: Festivus!].

Here’s how it works:

(It’s how bitcoin WORLD DOMINATION works)

Mr Christen Ager-Hanssen has generously put up over $550 USD to create a record-setting [4] $504.40 Word Bounty contest for best defining his common BitCoin-over-all phrase “World Domination”. If you haven’t entered, you should, here: SLictionary.com/WordBounty

$504.40 is a new SLictionary Word Bounty record, but Mr Ager-Hanssen predicts that by the end of 2023 record will be in the 5-digits! 👀 [ref 5 for tweet]

Previously, in order to reduce spam, we charged $0.01 for each entry into the contest — “nothing ventured, nothing gained”-style (put THAT phrase in SLictionary too). For normal word smithings, you can define anything you like for 1 penny right now (as we get more traffic, that price will go up, whilst seek-fees remain at just a penny for ad-free word wisdom). This also applied to Word Bounty contest entries, BUT NO LONGER REQUIRED. Now we just need a valid email address.

Old Word Bounty contest-entry instructions:

Go to SLictionary.com/WordBounty
Click on a word-row, for a word you think you can win.
At the pop-up prompt, choose Define the word “World Domination” link
Create! Our smithing-easel allows maximum artistic license with audio, pics/GIFs, and text-entry boxes for poetic artistry and intellectualism.
SUBMIT: at a cost of 1¢ in BSV, payable with HandCash (legacy: Money Button)
Most 💡votes 💡wins, 1 week after the first contest entry is received.
“Payday Friday” after the contest ends, we pay the winner in BitCoin to the wallet with which the winning Word$mith authenticated. So a BSV wallet is required. No more!

New Word Bounty BSV-free email-only contest-entry instructions:

Same as above, but change the following…

3) At the pop-up prompt, if it says you aren’t logged-in, JUST ENTER A VALID EMAIL!

…Remember when the word bounties were new; They required a bitcoin-penny, a feeling so blue; I’m looking for a pain-free onboarding romance, Not a picture of pain or a speed bumpy chance… No more words. You’re telling me you love me while you’re nickel & diming me away. No more words, no more words …And no more wallets required for onboarding love!” — Berlin

5. SUBMIT: The submit button will require no payment, your Word Bounty entry is free. (normal 1 penny fee applies for defining non-Word Bounty words)

7. “Payday Friday” we send muggles (those who used email instead of BSV wallet authentication) a hap-happy victorious email to pick up their BitCoin winnings (in this case $504.40) in either our SLictionary wallet at the MySlictionary page, or ask them to send us their paymail, which they will need to ONBOARD, and we will pay them directly.

🎵To BSV, or not to BSV; that is the question.
Whether ’tis nobler in the Word Bounty to suffer
The slings and arrows of outrageous onboarding,
Or to take but an email address against a sea of hurdles,
And by requiring BSV for contest-entry? To die: to sleep;
NO MORE!
and by a penny-required to say we end
the heart-ache and the thousand natural zero-balance shocks
That legacy onboarding is heir to, ’tis a wallet consummation
Devoutly to be wish’d. To die, to sleep;
But to win: perchance to dream of Bitcoin in your wallet on day one:
Ay! there’s the rub!
For in that wallet onboarding, what dreams may come,
When we have shuffled off this mortal wallet-required coil
And thus the native hue of email-only resolution! 🎵
— Shakespeare, Hamlet, Web III Scene I

Our longtime Word$mith and WordBaron fan Hussein Saad of Detroit, Michigan was the first to enter a Word Bounty contest submission using the new feature → Good Luck Ssayno! If you’re moving to Florida or California, get in touch! (the real estate agent’s email is in the pic)

Come all ye Faithful, joyful and triumphant Word Bounty winners, where you can be “onboarded” to BitCoin like Roman & Greek Empire Olympic athletes returning home from the conquering of aiSports competitors! If you are worthy, you’ll enter the realm of BitCoin as accomplished PAID artisans. Why would you EVER write another thing for wiki-sites who take and take but bare no alms for creators? There’s $504.40 to be made in World Domination. Tell your Mom, your Grandma, your boss, your friends that onboarding is a joyous and triumphant exercise now. Because it is, at SLictionary.com/WordBounty where we onboard only the best!

Enter your submission now for > $500 bounty reward now, contest ends this weekend (~Jan 8–10) [ref 3: hints for winning]

SLictionary.com/WordBounty