Digital Weddings | Determine Your Budget
This guide is part of Digital Weddings, a series of essays to help you figure out catering for your wedding (or accompanying event!). Head to the introduction or click around the “Next Steps” at the bottom of this post to navigate.
Money in the year 2020 is hella weird. You want to have a really special day but you also kinda need that money to…live. All of your potential vendors are going to ask you about your budget. You need to know how much you want to spend per person and your total budget range. When you’re shopping around, you might find you need to be creative with your spending. I’ve luckily worked with some crafty couples and perhaps some of their ideas will help you figure it out.
What’s in a catering budget?
All caterers itemize their budgets differently because they offer different services. Not all caterers provide all of these things, but you’ll need to cover them if they don’t. Sometimes venues have exclusive caterers they work with! If you have your heart set on a specific caterer, make sure the venue allows outside vendors.
Food: Things you eat. Yes. This might be rehearsal dinner, cocktail snacks, main dinner, dessert, brunch, and/or bbq.
Service: All the people who serve the food and clean up afterward.
Bar: Drinks! Alcoholic, nonalcoholic, water, ice, coffee, tea. Welcome drinks, cocktail hour, dinner service, dancefloor, dessert, and/or after party.
Rentals: Servingware, platters, tables, chairs, napkins, plates, glassware, kitchenware. Might include decor and maybe even the dance floor.
Insurance and permits: It depends on the venue but they may require general liability insurance from both you (to cover guests) and the caterer (to cover staff). In New York City, event insurance can run you as low as $29 for 100 guests.
Ask your venue about alcohol permits. The state of New York provides temporary beer and wine to venues up to 4 times a year⏤except for nonprofits! Established bars and catering companies can get full liquor licenses. (Full disclosure, I am only able to get beer and wine permits at this point!)
Ugh, Math!
Since you’re already in the midst of talking about getting married, you’ve probably already talked about money. If you haven’t set a total budget for the event yet, have an earnest conversation about what you’re willing to put toward it and how other people in your life are going to contribute, whether it is money, physical labor or goods.
Catering and bar can account for 30 to 60% of your total budget, depending on how important it is to you and the cost of making it happen. A two-hour cocktail-style party is going to cost less than a full, sit-down, 4-course dinner and cake. A keg in a bucket at a campsite is cost-effective but requires transportation and ice to keep it cold all weekend.
Your catering budget range is the lowest spend you can afford and the highest. Some caterers have packages for set amounts of people (I don’t, haha). It’s good to have an emergency fund or buffer. Food and transportation have a lot of variables, like seasonality or weather. A slush fund is handy for covering little emergencies like ice or more beer.
If you already know how much money you want to spend on catering, divide that by guest headcount plus 10%. What is that 10% for? Most vendors provide a shift meal for the servers, DJ and photographer. Think about it, all of those people could be at a remote venue in the woods working for you, they don’t have time to get a sandwich. This is, of course, negotiable and you could just get a pizza for the staff but that’s one more thing you would need to manage.
Total catering budget = (Guest headcount + 10%), Your Per Person Cost
Re: Tipping⏤Yes, you should do this. Set aside 15% to 20% of your contract or withdraw cash for the staff; $50 to $100 for per chef and $25 to $50 per server. Include bartenders in this, unless you’ve discussed a tip jar for them. Policies vary, but bring it up!
Come to Jesus
I really don’t mean going to church, but have that real talk conversation about what is viable with the budget you have with your vendors. If you set some priorities and “nice to have” items, you’ll know what to let go of first.
Do you want the nice glassware or the Iberico jamon shipped from Spain?
Do you want the DJ for 2 extra hours or the fancy cake you saw on TV?
Teamwork
Don’t worry, there are so many ways to bring the budget down. Here are real life examples from my clients. Not all caterers are going to be open to this, but it doesn’t hurt to ask. Like artists, a lot of us are trying to build our portfolios.
- Bre’s family let us borrow all of the serving ware and her papa caught all of the salmon for our main course.
2. Sam and Tim booked the venue on a Thursday (Halloween) and did not have a seated dinner.
3. Sam and Nico offered only one dinner option: burritos.
4. Erica and Jeff hired me to do the cocktail hour spread and got a pizza truck to drive in for dinner.
5. Katy and Stephane hosted a buffet (versus family style or coursed dinner).
6. Sam and Zephyr asked guests to bring appetizers and salads, potluck style.
7. Mitchell and Adam got some items donated, like soda (because one of them didn’t drink!) and a late-night pizza drop off.
8. Lucy’s sister baked 6 small cakes and her mom brought her famous dilly beans to go with our bbq.
9. Jen and SF scoured thrift shops for months to find 99 cent mismatched vintage plates for our cocktail hour.
Ultimately, the budget is up to you and what you are comfortable spending.
NEXT STEPS
- Start gathering ideas.
- Determine your budget [You are here!].
- Sketch out a schedule.
- Figure out your paperwork.
- Venue details.
- Get in touch with your caterer.
It doesn’t have to be me, but golly would I like that.
