OCTOBER 12-WORD CHALLENGE

What Every Birthday Girl Needs

You might be surprised to know the truth

No connection intended between Whacko Laco and 65-million-year-old lizards. Photo by Joyce Adams on Unsplash.

Warning: You will only get this if you are following a 12-word prompt put out by our fearless leader, Kristine Laco. You can find that article by clicking right here.

You can find mine — HERE. No clicking. Just reading.

It’s the most averagest of days.

Except it’s not.

Because it’s Kristine Laco’s birthday. Well, blow up my hoochie shorts and call them a Troll Tampon.

Sidenote: Troll Tampon was the name of my first pet. We shan’t go into further details about the fuzzy ballbag of a Pomeranian who went to heaven in a bag of stones.

Back to Her Royal Highness’s special day.

It cometh but once a year. And so it must be as full of fun and games as a communal condom that’s passed around a Beverly Hills urinal.

“So, Chiquita,” I asked at our last editor’s meeting. “What’s on your gimme gimme gift list this year?”

“Well,” she drawled. She’s gotten quite good at her Paula Deen impersonation. “I’ve become slightly addicted to gnawing on styrofoam cups.”