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Childhood Abuse Happens in Homes Contolled by Addiction and/or Mental Illness
If You Grew Up in a Troubled Family, You Either Became a Codependent or a Narcissist.

If You Grew Up in a Troubled Family, You Either Became a Codependent or a Narcissist.

“When the family energy is focused on the problem of the adult rather than on the needs of the children, the results for the children are…
Go to the profile of Kathy Berman
Kathy Berman
Codependency is a Pattern Learned in Childhood

Codependency is a Pattern Learned in Childhood

“At its heart, codependency is a set of behaviors developed to manage the anxiety that comes when our primary attachments are formed with…
Go to the profile of Kathy Berman
Kathy Berman
When We Discovered We Were Codependent, We Were Shocked.

When We Discovered We Were Codependent, We Were Shocked.

“Codependent people need external sources (things or other people) to give them feelings of self-worth. Often, following destructive…
Go to the profile of Kathy Berman
Kathy Berman
Childhood is Disrupted in a Home Controlled by Alcoholism

Childhood is Disrupted in a Home Controlled by Alcoholism

Photo by Senjuti Kundu on Unsplash
Go to the profile of Kathy Berman
Kathy Berman
Codependency Was Our Survival in a Troubled Family
Codependency Begins When the Child is the Emotional Parent to a Parent

Codependency Begins When the Child is the Emotional Parent to a Parent

“At its heart, codependency is a set of behaviors developed to manage the anxiety that comes when our primary attachments are formed with…
Go to the profile of Kathy Berman
Kathy Berman
We Become Immature Adults from the Power Struggle in Our Birth Family

We Become Immature Adults from the Power Struggle in Our Birth Family

“Often, our misunderstandings about love are born in disruptive family relationships, where someone was either one-up or one-down to an…
Go to the profile of Kathy Berman
Kathy Berman
Indifference is the Opposite of Love: Moving Away From an Abuser

Indifference is the Opposite of Love: Moving Away From an Abuser

The opposite of love isn’t hate. The opposite is indifference. When you no longer have feelings for someone, you have no reaction to them…
Go to the profile of Kathy Berman
Kathy Berman
How Did I Know That My Primary Addiction was to My Family of Origin?

How Did I Know That My Primary Addiction was to My Family of Origin?

I realized that I was an alcoholic and went to AA on Nov. 24, 1976. I never drank again nor did I ever think that alcohol could help any…
Go to the profile of Kathy Berman
Kathy Berman
Codependency Recovery Requires Changing These Behavior Patterns
My Journey to Accepting my Codependency Took 23 Years

My Journey to Accepting my Codependency Took 23 Years

In 1986, when I was 10 years sober, I read Melody Beattie’s Codependent No More. I was shocked that I identified because I was a…
Go to the profile of Kathy Berman
Kathy Berman
Learning How to Set Boundaries Will Determine Your Success at Codependency Recovery

Learning How to Set Boundaries Will Determine Your Success at Codependency Recovery

Because my parents never resolved their power struggle, I was elected “it”. That way each parent could find ways I was “wrong”…
Go to the profile of Kathy Berman
Kathy Berman
Detachment is a Necessary Learned Behavior for Codependency Recovery

Detachment is a Necessary Learned Behavior for Codependency Recovery

A big reason, if not the main reason that I drank too much, was to not feel my feelings. Not feeling them meant not having to acknowledge…
Go to the profile of Kathy Berman
Kathy Berman
Making Your Mind Your Friend by Using ACT (Acceptance and Commitment Therapy)

Making Your Mind Your Friend by Using ACT (Acceptance and Commitment Therapy)

“As you go deeper into yourself, you will naturally come to realize that there is an aspect of your being that is always there and never…
Go to the profile of Kathy Berman
Kathy Berman
Acceptance and Commitment Therapy Teaches Us How to Let Go of Negative Thoughts

Acceptance and Commitment Therapy Teaches Us How to Let Go of Negative Thoughts

“I recently read in the book My Stroke of Insight by brain scientist Jill Bolte Taylor that the natural life span of an emotion — the…
Go to the profile of Kathy Berman
Kathy Berman
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