Why is Decluttering So Hard? The Struggle is Real, But You Can Win

Jamila Renee Washington
5 min readFeb 14, 2024

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Ever look at your closets and wonder, “How did all this stuff get here?” You’re not alone! We all have a knack for accumulating things — some useful, some sentimental, and a whole lot that’s just plain junk. But why? Here’s the breakdown:

  • The Myth of Ownership: Once something is “ours,” it’s tough to let go. Our brains trick us into thinking that items gain value simply because we own them — even if we never use them!
  • Fear of Scarcity: Deep down, we worry about lacking something in the future. This fear makes us hold onto things we might need, creating a mountain of “just in case” items.
  • The Sunk Cost Fallacy: “I spent good money on that, I can’t just throw it away!” We’ve all been there. It’s hard to part with things we invested in, even if they no longer serve us.
Photo By Jamal K. Walker

Emotional Baggage: The Hidden Weight of Your Stuff

Clutter isn’t just about physical space; it’s emotional too. Our belongings often carry memories, hopes, and fears. Sometimes, those emotions become heavy burdens.

  • Unresolved Guilt: Gifts from well-meaning loved ones, even if unloved, can be tough to release. We feel like we’re letting people down by decluttering.
  • Lingering Attachments: Clothes from a happier time, souvenirs from past relationships… these objects tie us to the past, sometimes preventing us from moving forward.
  • Fear of Loss: Objects can become substitutes for people or experiences. Holding onto them gives us an illusion of control and helps us avoid confront painful feelings.

Excuse Buster: “But What If I Need It Someday?”

This is the ultimate decluttering roadblock. The “what if” fear kicks in and paralyzes us, making us keep way more than we truly need. Let’s break this excuse down:

  • Be Honest: When was the last time you actually needed that dusty bread maker? Chances are, the “someday” you envision rarely arrives.
  • Embrace the Option to Replace: In most cases, if you really do need something later, you can likely replace, borrow, or rent it easily.
  • Focus on the Now: Letting go of “what ifs” frees up space (mentally and physically) for what you currently enjoy and use.

Let’s face it, we can’t avoid clutter forever. Taking an honest look at why we cling to things is the first step towards achieving a lighter, freer life.

Decision Fatigue: How Too Much Choice Paralyzes You

Picture this: You’re finally tackling that cluttered drawer. Excitement turns to overwhelm as you face a jumble of items. “Keep? Toss? Maybe?” — each decision feels monumental. That’s decision fatigue at work!

  • Too Many Options: Clutter bombards our brains with endless choices. The more we have to sort through, the more mentally drained we become.
  • Paralysis by Analysis: We overthink every item, seeking the “perfect” decision. This leads to procrastination and, ultimately, piles of stuff stay right where they are.
  • The Fear of Regret: “What if I throw this away and regret it later?” It’s a common worry, but it keeps us trapped in indecision.

“It Was a Gift!” Overcoming Guilt to Let Things Go

Gifts can be tricky. They often carry sentimental value, even if the physical item itself holds no appeal. Let’s break free from the guilt trap:

  • Gratitude over Guilt: Focus on the love and intention behind the gift, not the object itself. Thank the giver, then remember you’re not obligated to keep something you don’t use or love.
  • Passing on the Joy: Can your unwanted gift become someone else’s treasure? Donating or repurposing allows the thoughtfulness behind the gift to live on.
  • Honoring Your Space: Your home should be a sanctuary, not a storage unit for guilt-inducing stuff. Prioritize your own comfort and needs.

Perfectionism is the Enemy: Done is Better Than Perfect

The quest for a perfectly curated home can be counterproductive. Letting go of perfectionism is key to making real decluttering progress.

  • Just Get Started: Don’t wait for the “perfect” time or system. Start small, tackle one area at a time, and celebrate each win, no matter how minor.
  • Progress over Perfection: A somewhat decluttered home is infinitely better than a perfectly cluttered one. Every bag donated, every shelf organized is a step towards freedom.
  • Don’t Compare: Social media can make decluttering look Insta-perfect. Don’t get discouraged! Focus on your journey and the benefits decluttering brings to your life.

It’s time to outsmart those excuses and get a handle on your stuff. Are you ready to continue?

While these decluttering strategies are definitely a solid start, there’s a whole world of helpful techniques out there! Many excellent authors offer different approaches to beating back the clutter beast. If you’re eager to find what works best for YOU, exploring other methods is absolutely worth it. Search for the optimal way to declutter and see what resonates!

Alright, let’s shift gears now and talk about actually creating some organized bliss in your home.

Creating a Clutter-Free Zone: Where to Start and How to Keep It Up

It may feel overwhelming with clutter all around. Don’t fret! Let’s make this manageable with a clear game plan:

  • Pick a Small Victory: Choose ONE specific area (not an entire room). That might be a cluttered drawer, a tabletop, or a single shelf. Success fuels our motivation!
  • Be Ruthless (Within Reason): Channel your inner no-nonsense inner titan! Sort items into clear categories: Keep, Donate, Trash, Recycle. No “maybe” piles allowed!
  • Designate Homes: Every single item you keep needs a designated place. If it doesn’t have a “home,” it’s probably not something you really need.
  • The One-In, One-Out Rule: Brought something new home? Let go of something you no longer use. This helps prevent new clutter from creeping in.
  • Little and Often: Set aside short bursts of time (even 15 minutes!) for decluttering each day. Consistent, small efforts bring the biggest long-term wins.

Decluttering may feel like a battle sometimes, but you’re winning the war. Keep learning, keep tackling those trouble spots, and celebrate every step of your journey!

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