Ruined by a Vision
My Manifesto for a New Economy
Some things, once seen, are impossible to unsee. Impossible to forget.
Sometimes I want to forget, to go back to a time where everything was comfortable, and society provided a soft pillow and warm pad on which to lay.
Is it a bed or a casket?
Or… are they one and the same?
I think I know….
I remember exactly where I was when the Vision destroyed me. Whether from the God above me or from the Universe around me or from the Deep within me, I’m not sure.
I was on a mission trip in the Philippines, in a municipality in Tarlac province. I had visited several times before and always helped as many of the poor as I could with the limited funds I had managed to scrape together.
But there was never enough. Never enough money, that is.
There was sacrificial love; there was emotional compassion; there was sincere desire… need almost… to help people, to even the field, to set things right.
And I dared to ask myself, Why?
Why were some living in such destitution while others (including me) were drowning in material goods, even decadence in comparison.
In my deepest spirit, I cried out, Why?
… And the answer I received on that road in the Philippines staggered my soul and ruined my life forever.
“The economy of the kingdom of man is built on buying and selling. The economy of the kingdom of heaven is built on giving and receiving. It is a question of currency: Money or Love.”
The problem is me.
The problem is that I participate in an economic system that encourages disparity. And that disparity cannot be avoided. It is simple mathematics.
The economy of the kingdom of man is mathematically unsustainable and will pass away. The economy of the kingdom of heaven is continually abounding and eternal.
Around which economy will I build? And which currency will I choose?
The implications of this Vision still ripple across the pond of my consciousness even to this very day. But the message is clear: I have to embrace my neighbor as myself and believe in the hidden justice of Life itself.
And that… is scary.
In the years since that day, I have wrestled with the Vision of that moment. At times, I have confidently pressed on, despite the quiet murmuring of friends and family and the derision of society at large. At other times, I have cowered from the call, wanting to forget I ever received it. Hoping, maybe, that I could forget it forever.
I have learned now that there are a few others whose lives were also ruined by this same beautiful nightmare.
And there is even a name for it: The Gift Economy.
But whether there is an official name or movement, I really don’t care. The Vision was given directly to me, and I must obey that call…
… or die.
I know that I will probably never benefit materially in this life from the Vision. But a thousand years from now, I believe that humanity will be living in a kinder, more compassionate state.
I have to believe that.
I want to live, and die, knowing that someday… somehow… the world will be a more beautiful place because I lived in it… and loved among it.
And knowing this causes the Vision to shine…
… and my Spirit to smile.
“The greatest achievement was at first and for a time a dream. The oak sleeps in the acorn; the bird waits in the egg; and in the highest vision of the soul a waking angel stirs. Dreams are the seedlings of realities.”
— James Allen
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