Child sCare Part I: Daycare Dangers
“Hey, man. You did really good work with that polygraph examination yesterday. Getting a confession from that guy and putting him in a place where he can’t hurt any other kids — that means a lot to me.”
At that moment, I didn’t know why it meant a lot to him. My boss was a good guy but he was quiet and didn’t normally dole out kudos — especially with such a personal overtone. As a polygraph examiner for a federal agency that didn’t typically deal with absolute monsters, I assumed he was simply impressed we got involved in a case that had significant community impact. Ending up sitting across from an alleged child abuser and eliciting a confession was not an everyday occurrence for me. It was something my colleagues and I were called upon to do on an infrequent basis. Our agency has a mandate from the U.S. Congress to conduct this type of work when called upon. It was unsettling but rewarding.
Curious about his comment, I approached a colleague and conveyed the interaction to him.
“You know why, right?” he asked.
“Nope.”
“His daughter. She was a victim. Her case was the first successful prosecution of shaken baby syndrome in the state where he used to live. Their babysitter did it. She wouldn’t admit it until after the trial was over. This stuff is a big deal to him.”
“Whoah.” I was caught completely off-guard. How could that possibly happen? It didn’t make sense. How could that happen to the daughter of a federal agent? To this guy? He was the nicest, quietest person I had ever met.
The reality is, it could happen to a lot of people. According to the National Children’s Alliance, nearly 700,000 children are abused in the United States annually. A scarier statistic is that a parent was the perpetrator in 78.1% of the cases of substantiated maltreatment. But that still leaves almost ¼ of those instances to fall on someone other than the parent. I am not a math major, but 22% of 700,000 still puts that number over 100,000.
I can’t go back in time to help my old boss, but maybe I can help prevent it from happening to you.
Fast-forward ten years from that discussion and I am staring at my four-month-old son. This little person is the coolest dude on the block. Except that he hasn’t figured out how to take care of himself yet. This is a problem. Mom is about to come off maternity leave and we need options. The two of us are in desperate need of child-care and all I can think about is making sure he stays safe. How?
The easiest answer is we give up our extra income. One of the two of us abandons or suspends our respective careers and stays home with little man. But as I already stated, 78.1% of substantiated child abuse is found to be a parent, so, playing the odds, we opted to go for child-care.
I am, of course, trying to introduce some levity to an unsettling topic. But regardless of our reasons, we decided upon child-care.
Which meant I needed to ensure that my little guy was going to be safe in child-care, so what did we do? Hopefully, some of the same things you will do.
Educate Yourself.
You are reading this blog. That is a pretty good start to educating yourself. The big decision is whether or not you are going to go with institutional daycare or a nanny/nanny-share. This will be a two-part series and today, we will cover daycare. Stay tuned for the next release about nannies and babysitters.
Different strokes for different folks, but either way, you are going to want to do some research in your neighborhood. We started with our neighborhood Facebook page and friends in the neighborhood who had kids to get references for both. We could have gone direct to an Internet search engine — and you could too — but recommended places from neighbors and friends you trust helps.
Research.
Once we locked down our options on daycare we looked at the following websites to learn more about the history of the daycare provider. Worthy sites for us included:
Virginia Department of Social Services. DSS listed inspection dates and complaints about the daycares they received. Check with your state’s DSS site to see if they, or another state department conduct similar compliance checks.
Google. Google arguably knows too much about everything. In some cases, like this, it is a good thing. Some people will post reviews about the daycare on Google. Like most things that Google provides to you, take it with a grain of salt.
The National Association for the Education of Young Children or National Association for Family Child Care. NAYEC and NAFCC provide national accreditation for childcare centers. For their lists of standards and approved daycares, visit their respective websites.
Care.com, Inc. In the world of child-care, ‘Care.com’ is a go-to for a lot of resources. It is with daycare and will be with nanny-care as well. We have used it extensively.
Visit.
From there, it will be on you to set up a visit with the daycare establishments you select. Most daycares would like you to schedule an appointment. Take the extra step and stop by unannounced, asking to see the facilities one additional time — when they are unprepared for a visit. When you do visit, ask a lot of questions:
Ask.
Is this an accredited daycare facility and by what organization? How does the accreditation process work? For us, this was a requirement.
Has this daycare ever received any complaints? If so, what were they and how did you deal with them? There is no guarantee they will be honest with you, but this is why you should also check with the city and state boards/departments to see what kind of enforcement is conducted.
How are the employees screened? What kinds of background checks are utilized and what are some examples of things in a background that would disqualify someone from being hired? Also, are there periodic updates to the background checks and what responsibility do your employees have in notifying you if they are arrested or have contact with law enforcement? Background checks are not foolproof but you want to see some barriers to entry in place. Periodic checks are also important and reassuring.
What kind of first aid and emergency training are employees required to have? Is there first aid/medical equipment on site in case of an emergency? A requirement for us, we wanted to see daycare providers who had, at the very least, Red Cross approved basic first aid trained staff and an infant AED on site.
What is the emergency plan for the children if there is a fire or emergent event at the building? What kinds of drills are conducted? It is important to see that the daycare is prepared to deal with an emergency situation. This question should elicit such a reponse.
What kind of security is in place? Can people just walk right in off the street or are the doors locked and require an issued pass or employee to allow access? This was another requirement for us. We wanted to see locked doors and someone sitting/monitoring the front door to confront anybody curious enough to try to make entry without permission. We also live in a city. Suburbs may be different.
Are there security cameras that I can access from home/work to look in on my child? Another requirement for us that allows for a peace of mind.
How will the daycare contact me if there is an emergency? Or how can I guarantee that when I call I will get a person on the phone if I have an emergency? In a moment of stress, you don’t want to be anymore stressed than you have to be so, plan ahead.
Hopefully, you have some child development questions for them too. I didn’t. I only had security questions. That is why I married my wife. She asked the other ones. The questions above are not all-inclusive, nor do you have to ask all of them. It should get you in the mindset for the interaction and help you get the most of the visit.
Decide.
From here, it will be decision time. After comprehensively researching three or four daycare facilities, we had a good idea of where we wanted to enroll our son. Our finalist was based on the visits and the answers we got to our questions. The final factor was, for better or worse, gut instinct based on what we saw and heard. It will be different for different people, but using the steps above will make this decision easier.
Check back in with us later for the second part focusing on more personalized child-care.
Learn more about the Safe Kids Security Council here.
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