Breakup Confusion: Moving On When You Don’t Know How
Recently I’ve felt super conflicted and confused as I continue moving on from my recent breakup. I’m still assessing who I was in the relationship, the way I behaved, and what everything might mean about me in the present and what I ought to be doing and learning as I move on. People will say there’s a pre-breakup you and a post-breakup you but who are we between those two states?
When I look back on the relationship, my opinions seem to change hour to hour, depending on mood and what part of the relationship I’m choosing to focus on. Do I regret what happened? Do I want the relationship back? Am I happier now I’m on my own, or worse? Am I a bad person, guilty and shameful? Am I empowered by my new found freedom, independent and strong? And what of future relationships? Am I doomed the same fate as this past one?
As you can imagine or may be experiencing right now, these conflicting questions are anything but easy to sort through.
This is all to say, breakups can leave us confused by the myriad of thoughts we have, emotions we feel, and behaviours we engage in to soothe, distract, heal, or sabotage ourselves.
If you are indeed someone who is feeling like I am, then welcome to the party and let’s be confused together.
