Dissecting a CPTSD Nightmare
Why is My Subconscious Yelling at Me This Time?
My traumatized brain is mean as hell to me.
Nightmares are a regular occurrence for me, a thrilling side-effect of my CPTSD, but this particular one had been nagging at me all day. As I recounted the heart-pounding details to my partner the next morning, I began to see the meaning through the seemingly random chaos.
Warning: This Section is Not for the Squeamish
In the nightmare, I was looking into a dimly lit bathroom mirror and holding onto something that I thought was a tube of lipstick or something.
When I opened the tube, however, it was like a spring-loaded booby trap. Picture one of those cans of nuts with the fake snakes in it, except even less fun.
A bunch of pieces of metal (imagine sharp, long metal toothpicks) came shooting out of the tube like a bullet.
I was looking into the tube when I opened it, so the metal spikes shot directly into my face. When I looked back into the mirror, there were about 10 of them grotesquely stabbed into me at all angles.
One piece had gone through my left cheek into my eye, which was milky white as though it had been blinded.
