Spending Habits and Addictions: How They’ve Impacted My Life And What I Did
Never let money feed your bad habits.
There’s a common theme of lack of self-control here. You will see how this lack of self-control fares for me and what you can learn from it.
I am always horrible with money. Money gets spent at places that are not worth my money. My horrible spending habits go far back to my childhood.
When I was a young boy, I wasted lunch money on vending machines at school. It would be money that my mother would supply me with.
With money, I never controlled myself. Once, my mother caught me at the store spending money that was meant to be used for lunch. I believe that was in middle school. Looking back, I couldn’t restrain myself from spending money.
I always eat out once a week, on payday, on all days. Then, I usually go to a “coffee stand.” Furthermore, from Tuesday to Wednesday, I pay 11 dollars. Also, I add in a ten-dollar tip.
Well, I don’t just get coffee, but I get other things as well.
A cheap thrill for my eye’s delight. Only if I give a tip. Yet, I enjoy it. This cheap thrill of mine, I can taste it in my mouth.
Maybe that’s a little obsessive. Or better yet, it’s addictive. It costs me greatly.
For what, you may ask? It feels good.
Addiction
In my adolescent years, I watched porn a lot. I even masturbated three or four times a day. Most of this you read in my blog, Six viewpoints I have about masculinity. To dig further, porn has impacted how I view women. Sometimes, I am a borderline objectifier of them.
What else could I rely on for advice? I lived with my mother and grandma. Yet, none of that stopped me from losing self-control over my desires. Not to the point that I would try to force interaction with anyone. That is out of my striking range.
Eventually, I got on my own and started seeing escorts and going to strip clubs and gay bathhouses. This felt good, but I was wasting my time seeking a temporary feel-good-for-the-moment vibe.
Self-realization
I realize now that this is hampering my wallet. Everything that happened after I continued to discard my money into the trash was an omen to quit.
It could be hard to quit spending money at that “coffee stand” I go to. Maybe it’s the ADHD because I did take Ritalin when I was younger. To my knowledge, that is what Ritalin is used for.
Ironically, I’m doing my best not to watch porn, visit escorts, go to strip clubs, and go to gay bathhouses. This is all detrimental to my well-being as a human.
Conclusion
There’s a lesson in my self-induced lesions. Spend your money wisely. Never let money feed your bad habits. Most importantly, have self-restraint over your strongest urges.
