Is it Time for a Resolution Reset?

4 tools to help you get your New Year commitment back on track

What if you could start your New Year’s resolution again?

The statistics are not promising and chances are, if you set a New Year’s resolution, then you are already well on your way to breaking it. In fact, less than 10% of all New Year’s resolutions actually last the distance … and by the beginning of February, nearly 60% of resolutions will have already failed.

That’s a lot of broken promises and, perhaps more importantly, it’s an awful lot of unconscious-and-destructive self-criticism, belittlement and blame.

So, what’s happening here, year after year: do we enjoy beating ourselves up? Or are we simply making resolutions that aren’t right for us? I believe the issue is simple: most resolutions are doomed to fail because we are choosing them for the wrong reason.

February is the time of year when most of us give up on our New Year’s commitment. That makes it the perfect time for a Resolution Reset. So, throw off that sense of failure, reconnect with your inherent resilience and amazingness … and let’s explore how you can re-choose a resolution for yourself, right here, right now, that you can actually keep:

1. Get your timing right

In modern society, we have become absurdly attached to man-made concepts of time. But just because the calendar has ticked past an arbitrary date, it doesn’t mean you, as an individual, are in the best space to create something new. Before you even attempt to set a resolution, become more mindful of your daily experiences and the natural rhythm of your life right now. Are you in a state of ending and clearing (lots of goodbyes, things fading out of your life, apparent road blocks)? Trying to begin something new when your life is in a natural ebb state is like trying to plant a seed in the deep-frost of winter.

There are a number of new year celebrations around the world — such as those in February, June, September and November — so if your life is not ripe for new commitments, change or adaptations, don’t get hung up on the Gregorian 1st of January. Simply wait for another, more conducive date to step into a ‘new you’.

“It’s not about the what of your resolution, it’s about the why.”

2. Be clear about your intent

Here’s my tip: if you use the word ‘should’ when describing the reasons behind your New Year’s resolution, then it will almost certainly fail. The word ‘should’ carries with it a sense of resistance and invites in struggle, resentment and ultimate disappointment.

In contrast, when you commit to something because you want to, you are fully aligned with the decision: body, mind and soul. You will have the determination you need, the energy you require and the willpower to see it through.

The resolution reset is a great opportunity to get clear about what you ‘want’ for yourself. (Not what society wants; not what your parents want. What you want.) Of course, what we want for ourselves and what others want or expect from us are not mutually exclusive. The important thing to understand is that it’s not about the what of your resolution, it’s about the why.

Do you believe you should lose 5kg because it’s an appealing number on your bathroom scales … or do you want to eat more nutritionally because you’d love to feel more energized? Do you think you should stop wasting time on social media feeds … or do you want to nourish yourself more often with inspiring activities, surroundings and conversations? Make sure you have the right intent when setting your goal, as this will help you maintain a higher level of enthusiasm and commitment in the months ahead.

3. Only focus on the things within your control

It’s all well and good to say ‘I’m going to change my job by the end of the year’, but in doing so, you may be setting yourself up for bitter disappointment. You can’t control the current job market, or the decisions of others. What you can promise yourself is that you will explore every employment opportunity, or that you will up-skill, or you will believe in your abilities more unconditionally. When conducting a resolution reset, make sure that you don’t commit to a goal that is out of your control. Keep the focus solely on you; your decisions, your actions and your attitude.

4. Choose to be, rather than do

We live in a world obsessed with doing and, often, our resolutions are based on what we can achieve in a physical sense: join a gym, learn the guitar, spend less time on social media etc. But the easiest resolutions for us to maintain are those that focus on who we want to be: kinder, more assertive, more mindful, more optimistic etc. When we resolve to be something new, or greater, we place full responsibility in our own hands. And if we truly want to be something new, we will find ways to grow, adapt and evolve, and achieve our resolution.

As we step further forward into 2018, it is very likely that you have already left your resolution behind. But don’t let that fuel a misplaced sense of failure, hopelessness or self-admonishment. Know you are an incredible creation of nature and, given the right circumstances, you are designed to thrive and succeed.

Simply take the time, now, to reset that resolution … and make a promise to yourself that is heartfelt, authentic and ignited from the flames of your true desire.

Kim Forrester is an award-winning author, educator and intuitive consultant with over 15 years’ experience as a professional intuitive and spiritual teacher. She combines cutting edge science with traditional spiritual philosophy to offer the latest understandings of psi, consciousness and holistic well being.