The Introvert Hangover: What Is It? & What Can You Do About It?

That’s not a medical term by the way. In fact, it’s not a recognised medical condition, but that doesn’t mean that it isn’t real.

People, this is very real.

Call it what you like. Burnout, sensory overload, social fatigue. When I experience this it’s similar to the aftermath of far too many sambuca shots without all the fun.

It’s hard to explain to someone how you feel at the end of a busy day at work. Because after all, you’ve just been to work. And yes, we can all feel a little jaded after a busy day but it’s more than that.

This Is What It Feels Like For Me

I have a headache that feels like my head is in a vice and it’s being crushed. It feels like there is so much ‘stuff’ in my head that it will burst, like there’s no more room for tiniest morsel of information. It’s sore to the touch and it’s tired. So very, very tired.

It’s not the only thing that’s tired. My body is drained, almost like the onset of the flu, there is a limit to what I can do and that’s limit is pretty low.

I can’t think straight and I can’t concentrate on anything so if you speak to me I’m definitely not listening to you. Nothing of what you say will go in and stay there. Quite frankly, you’re wasting your time. In fact any noise of any kind, no matter what the volume will physically hurt.

Because of this I’m extremely irritable and a little anxious so the slightest annoyance, that would ordinarily be mildly irritating, will quite possibly send me over the edge.

And please don’t ask me to make any decisions during this time. I mean ANY. What’s that…. do I want a cup of tea? Really, I just don’t know right now so please don’t hassle me with this because I’ll quite possibly get panicked by this seemingly irrelevant conundrum.

Fortunately for me I can spot the signs well before I get this frazzled and I know I need to take a break. I can plan my days so I have downtime between commitments and I know better than to cram my schedule full of back to back tasks.

But what happens when I do succumb to the full throttle of over stimulation? Quiet time. Time alone when I can just zone out and simply exist in a quiet space. It’s not a case of thinking what do I need, it’s a case of feeling what my body needs. If that’s a lie down in a dark room then so be it. If it’s gulping down fresh air then I do it. For me, it’s about honouring what my body is telling me.

What Exactly Is An Introvert Hangover?

Good question.

Like I said before, it’s not a literal illness, but rather a metaphorical state of emotional and mental exhaustion. It occurs when an introvert has spent an extended period interacting socially, leaving them drained and depleted. Unlike extroverts, who recharge through social interaction, we introverts need time alone to rejuvenate our energy and process our thoughts.

Interacting socially can mean gatherings with friends, dinners, parties or long intervals of one on one connection. And it can also mean spending time in others’ company for extended periods. Having house guests to stay can feel like there’s no escape no matter how much you adore your visitors.

And then there’s the work environment. A challenging schedule of back to back meetings and calls will trigger this, as will working in an open plan office with lots of artificial light and background noise. When there isn’t sufficient time for us to replenish our depleted energy, we’re essentially giving away energy we don’t have sending us spiralling into energy debt.

As deeply introspective individuals, our minds are constantly processing a vast amount of information, especially in social settings. Being in the presence of others means we absorb a tremendous amount of data. Our attention is consumed by observing and analysing not only the thoughts and emotions of those around us but also the spoken words. Consequently, we often find ourselves overwhelmed and overstimulated due to the intensity of this mental activity.

Coping With The Introvert Hangover

Despite your best efforts there are likely to be times when it’s unaviodable. So what strategies can you use to get you through?

1. Prioritise self-care: Everybody’s response to this will be different so whatever it is that you need to rejuvenate, make time for it. A long bath, a nap, walking in nature or a non-taxing hobby. Feel into what your body is telling you that it needs.
2. Practice mindfulness: Engage in mindfulness techniques, such as deep breathing exercises, meditation, or yoga. These practices can help you quiet your mind, reduce stress, and restore your energy.
3. Reflect and journal: If you’re able to take time to reflect on the experiences that got you there and the emotions. Journaling can be a helpful tool to process your thoughts and gain insights into your needs and boundaries. Writing down your feelings can also provide a sense of release and clarity, but try not to think too much as this can add to the exhaustion. Just offloading the first thing that comes to mind whether that’s in words or doodles is helpful.

Prevention Is Better Than Cure

Prevention is always better than cure and by implementing a few strategies, we can reduce the likelihood of experiencing an episode:

1. Know your triggers: Identifying what your triggers are will help you avoid these situations and enable you to proactively manage your episodes.
2. Plan breaks: When attending social events or engaging in extended social activities, make sure to schedule intermittent breaks for yourself. These breaks allow you to step away, find solitude and recharge. Plan your working day so that it isn’t always full to the brim of commitments. If you regularly book calls for 30 or 60 mins try shortening them to 20 mins or 45 mins and use the space in between to recharge. Also block out time in your calendar for solo work, which will prevent others from stealing your time. And if possible split your time between the office and working from home.
3. Set boundaries: Communicate your needs to others and establish clear boundaries regarding your personal space and time. Letting people know in advance of your availability can help manage expectations and your energy levels. Remember, it’s OK to say no.
4. Schedule ‘me’ time: Take a proactive approach by consciously scheduling alone time either before or after a social event or any situation that might overwhelm you with excessive stimulation. Knowing that you have dedicated time for solitude can help prevent an introvert hangover. At the very least, it ensures you have the necessary space to recharge and replenish your energy. If you have a big work commitment try to schedule some quiet time the evening before so that your energy levels are topped up in preparation.

Be Authentic

This applies to all settings. Whether it’s in a group or with a specific individual, if you’re unable to show up as your authentic self and relax in the company of others, not only are you absorbing everything that’s going on around you, you’re also standing on ceremony for whoever your with. Behaving in a way that you think is expected of you, rather than being able to relax and just be yourself will exhaust you. Self acceptance is a must.

Final Thoughts

It might take you 2 hours or 2 weeks to recover from an introvert hangover, depending on the severity. But understanding why it happens and how to manage it is crucial to maintain your well-being and find a happy medium.

Remember, honouring your introverted needs is essential so don’t apologise for who you are and don’t for one moment see it as a weakness.