Is self-improvement a solitary path? Why do we often disengage from support groups that could help us along the way?

Embarking on a journey of self-improvement can be a solitary road. It’s no stroll in the park. It’s hard, and you can feel like you’re on a different path.

You want to change your habits, but it’s tough when no one else seems to be doing the same. Progress can be slower than a snail’s crawl. You might not see results for months.

It can be disheartening, especially with no one cheering you on. That’s one of the primary reasons overcoming addictions is such a monumental challenge. Relying solely on personal desire often falls short.

I’m no saint myself. It’s painful to be different. I feel like temptation is lurking around every corner, ready to pounce. It’s everywhere, readily available.

Associating with those who’ve walked this journey can be a game-changer. You’ll hear their upbeat stories, tales of challenges, and how it all seemed easy in the end.

However, constant cheerleading might frustrate you, especially when your situation is nowhere near as rosy as theirs. You will likely begin to disengage, slowly and quietly.

Then there is the company of others trying to make similar changes as you. Folks in the same general background, with similar ideas of improvements. Setting and sharing goals. Cheering each other’s activities and successes. Isn’t this awesome?

Not really. It can get mundane. Everyone’s battling their own frustrations. They talk about their struggles, and it feels like they’re just one step away from throwing in the towel. You will likely start moving back to your old habits with every excuse and reason to make you justify the decision.

So, what do you do? Here is a possible analogy. Left in the middle of a desert. Good company to walk with you but will reduce the limited resources you have left. Animals who survived the desert can one day be a source of your sustenance and in another day the one sustaining you. Maybe you can find a better analogy.

If you want to get better, there’s no other way but to put in the work. Staying put isn’t an option.

Those who’ve reached the goals you’re striving for have conquered their journey. Listening to their positivity and straightforward advice can be both a boost and frustration.

If you find folks who are on a similar journey, they’re struggling with the same ups and downs.

The key thing is to begin and never give up.

Indecision will solve nothing. So why wait? Let’s begin first. We will figure it out along the way.

Start and maintain your momentum, even when you don’t see immediate results. You might start doubting yourself, but that’s when you should connect with people who’ve reached your desired destination. Their words will reignite your fire.

Then, you’ll meet up with peers, discuss the hardships, and you will slow down again. It’s okay, slow down a bit.

Then you’ll notice slight improvements in yourself, and you might wonder if you did something differently than the others.

Unexpected circumstances may temporarily halt your progress, but another inspiring voice will rekindle your determination.

Some days up. Other days down. Keep up your pace for one week. Slow down your pace next few weeks. Catch up some more next month. On it goes.

Why take this roller-coaster? Why engage these different groups? Remember, this journey is lonely. It’s unlikely most of us will make it alone.

Even if someone will help cheer up say 50% of the time, it’s better than zero. It is what we have. When difficulties arise, you don’t want them to derail you completely. You want to get back on track, even if you slow down a bit. So even when you start to slow down, even when some of these networks might make you disengage and you start to give up, another one will ignite you. If you stay with the network, it will happen. Disengagement is not an option.

Your biggest competition is your past self, not others. Even though these groups may frustrate you some days and may cause you to slow down, they are the only teams who will be the cause for you to cheer up and speed up many times.

For Completeness’s sake, I thought I should add this. Don’t need to be foolish about the “never giving up” theme either. There are times and paths that you should stop taking. That is the only way you will have the opportunity to take the path that you must.

Be kind to yourself and understand that change takes time. Soon years will pass, and you’ll look back, realizing you’ve made it. The idea is not to measure success after a short period. There are no easy wins!

You did not learn your alphabet in a day or a week. You did not learn additions or subtractions in a week or even a month either. What type of arrogance makes you believe you will learn and elevate your skills and habits in a month or even a quarter?

At least look back 6–12 months before. Ideally, look back multi-years back. Look back in years, and you will always see success.

So why wait? Begin now and keep pushing forward.

Until next time, Cheers,

Amit