I started meditating almost 20 years ago after reading an article that claimed it could reduce stress. At the time I had a lot of stress, and I needed all the help I could get.

I didn't know much about meditating. I sat on the floor with my back against the wall and my legs crossed (I couldn't do the fancy “lotus position,” — I still can’t, actually). I set a timer for 20 minutes, and focused on my breath as it entered and exited my nostrils. It was a not-so-magical experience that lasted about four minutes. At that point, I opened my eyes to see how much time had passed, and immediately got frustrated. I decided to be diligent, though, and closed my eyes again. This time, for around two minutes. At that point, I decided to end my first foray into meditating altogether!

So, what happened? Well, I discovered that my mind was absolutely crazy. In six minutes of meditating, I bounced around to subjects spanning from grade school to what happened at work the day before. I got sidetracked thinking about somebody that pissed me off more than three years earlier, and I thought about something I said to a friend last week that inadvertently upset him. My mind jumped to bills I needed to pay, and I wondered if I put a stamp on the envelope I dropped in the mailbox that morning (I mean, I couldn't remember — did I?). I went over my to-do list for the next day, and I thought about what I needed to do for a meeting that was coming up Friday afternoon. And, I thought about “Raiders of the Lost Ark.” Why? I hadn't seen that movie in at least five years, so I have no idea why it popped into my head.

My mind was like a puppy, awkwardly hopping from object to object, and unable to settle on any one thing for more than a few seconds. And, the really bad part was, I couldn't stop it. I tried to — I willed myself to stop, I commanded myself to stop…all to no avail.

It wasn't until some time later that I began studying about the mind and came to understand its true nature, and the challenges it creates in our daily lives. Your mind is compulsive — it never stops. Have you ever said “My mind is racing?” Or, “I can’t stop thinking?” Your mind is always going, and those were just the few times that you actually became aware of it.

Your mind keeps you up at night, it pulls you into the past to make you regret things you did or didn't do, it creates worries about the future, and it forces you to dwell on (and stress about) so many things: that person that wronged you at work or school, your money problems, whether your kids will turn out to be degenerates or valued members of society, an imagined confrontation where you tell off your boss or exact revenge on that jerk that cut you off on the way home. And, maybe, you fantasize about an alternate reality where you are a secret agent, or you are an actor/actress accepting an Academy Award. The list of possibilities is endless!

Most people don’t realize any of this is going on. They simply get swept away by it; they are “lost in thought.” And those thoughts lead to feelings, emotions, and urges that carry us away, and reactions that happen with little or no conscious intervention. We get moody, we get depressed, we get anxious, we question ourselves and our abilities, and we say or do things that we regret later. We spend most of our life on “auto-pilot,” following our mind wherever it leads us. And then we talk about our stress, our anxiety, the pressure of our job, our spouse, our kids, and on and on; all of these things become the struggles of life.

But the good news is, meditation can help. It teaches you to observe your mind and its activity, and conditions you to not get swept away by it. You learn to observe thoughts and not dwell on them. You break the cycle of “knee-jerk” reactions. And slowly — with persistence, consistency, and effort — you take your life off auto-pilot.

By meditating, you cultivate awareness of your mind-made activity, and you see its true nature: none of it is permanent. Your mind tries to make you believe that it is — that you have these problems that will never go away, problems more serious than those of anyone else. And, it convinces you that you need to spend your days drowning in worry, stress, fear, self-doubt, and conflict.

But, your practice teaches you not to cling to the mental drama. It teaches you that you can watch it all come and go, like clouds in the sky.

It is hard to explain the benefits of meditating , because it’s something that you have to experience. But once you learn to separate what is real from the stories playing in your head, life improves dramatically. There is a big difference between a lion that is going to eat you in your mind, and an actual lion that is going to eat you. You may laugh at that sentence, but most people go through life without realizing the difference, and they carry around the stress, anxiety, and worry that comes as a result. Or, they suffer the depression that comes from replaying sad, negative, despair-filled stories continuously in their mind. Or, they develop a terrible self-image and a lack of self-confidence because a voice in their head constantly tells them that they will never be good enough.

I meditate every day, and I like to think I’m a bit more skilled than I was in the beginning, almost 20 years ago (sometimes I’m not, though!). I've had ups and downs, a lot of forward progress…and, at times, several steps backward. But, looking at the big picture, I've come to realize that I don’t have to let my mind steer the ship. And I certainly don’t have to follow it wherever it leads. Maybe that is the secret to life? I don’t know, but I do know it certainly makes life a better place to be.

I’ll give you another update in 20 years — in the meantime, why don’t you give meditating a shot? You don’t have to wear robes and chant, you don’t have to study Eastern philosophy or new-age mysticism (meditation will not conflict with your philosophical/religious beliefs), and you don’t have to sit in the lotus position.

Most important, you can’t do any worse than I did my first time!

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