June Mental Health Collection and Writing Prompt—Mirror Moments
There was a moment when you knew.
This has to stop.
Things have to change.
I can’t go on like this anymore.
It goes by many names, but I like to call it the mirror moment. The moment in which we must face ourselves and our situation, see how ugly things have become, and decide whether or not to do something about it. Many of us in recovery have experienced a mirror moment, and often more than one. Sometimes, we give it an effort but fall quickly back into old patterns. Sometimes, though, it sticks. Every once in awhile, the mirror moment sparks a true shift in how we choose to navigate the world.
What does it take, then, to use this momentum and make a lasting change? And how can we support ourselves through the work ahead?
At Messy Mind, we’ve been there. It hasn’t always been pretty — mirror moments seldom are — but we’ve come out the other side with a better understanding of ourselves. We can’t give you answers, but we can share our stories. The guiding truth we’ve come to discover is that, no matter how isolated we feel, we are not alone.
For a more frequent reminder of this simple yet life-changing fact, be sure to join us on our journey by following Messy Mind on Medium and by subscribing to the newsletter.
A Cultural Mirror Moment
While I started out this newsletter thinking about personal mirror moments, I am also conscious that we are all living through a mirror moment around racial equity in the United States and the world at large. Each past such moment has led to some level of change, yet none — taken separately or together — have achieved what should be the ultimate goal of any movement for social justice: a world in which all people are treated equally and afforded the same opportunities.
Messy Mind is committed to amplifying all voices toward that aim, and it is my sincere hope that this latest look in the mirror will lead to the radical change we have needed for centuries.
Mirror Moments in Messy Mind
This month, Paul Fjelrad joined Messy Mind as a writer. I’m honored to have him as a part of the writing team, and you can expect to see some painfully beautiful works of art from him going forward. Please give him a follow, and read about one mirror moment in his debut story, Who Am I Behind This Mask?
Paul’s daughter, Natasha Fjelrad, also joined us with her debut story, I Am Not Broken. I Am Different and That’s Okay. In this beautiful telling, she describes a mirror moment when she reunited with her father after more than a decade apart.
As this is our first newsletter, it’s worth a look back at the launching point for this publication. Back in 2018, my life was not my own. My mirror moment occurred over a glass (bottle) of wine and an Italian dinner with a close friend. What began as a trepidatious phone call to a therapist turned out to be one of the most defining periods in my life. And it’s all chronicled in my very first personal essay, Cleaning Up My Messy Mind.
Cameo Contreras shares a different kind of mirror moment in The Fight For His Mind, a heartbreakingly honest ode to her twin boys.
Mirror Moments in Literature
I, Racist, by John Metta. I came across this article several years ago, and it was one of many factors that increased my awareness of the difference between the way white people and people of color experience the world. Metta asserts — and I personally have unfortunately been guilty of this — that when confronted with the fact that we live in a racist system, “White people in general decide to vigorously defend their own personal non-racism, or point out that it doesn’t exist because they don’t see it.”
Billy by Pamela Stephenson, the biography of the famed comedian and actor, Billy Connolly, written his psychiatrist wife. Track his progress from early years in the tenements and shipyards of Glasgow, to comedy stages and cinema screens of the world, forever driven by his distaste of all things beige and the never-ending desire to be more windswept and interesting. In this raw, challenging, hilarious and bittersweet tale, Stephenson describes how Billy survived poverty, violence and abuse from his childhood, only to be caught up in the excesses of drink and drugs as his success blossomed, even while bringing joy and laughter to millions. Billy is forever brave, unapologetically controversial and endlessly funny in equal measure. In this clip from 2001, Billy describes a major mirror moment in his characteristic tongue-in-cheek style.
Writing Prompt
Have you ever had a mirror moment? Did you follow through to make a lasting change? How did you find it within yourself to make it through? What kind of support did you seek? Write about it, and then submit your essay to Messy Mind. If you’re not already a writer for us, request to be added; do so a week before you plan on submitting a story, just to be safe. If you are, just add your story to the pub by June 30. Please use the tag “MirrorMomentPrompt.” Exceptional submissions will be highlighted in next month’s newsletter.
Shameless Plugs
Don’t forget to sign up to receive this newsletter for more mental health and introspective resources. If these words have spoken to you, they may speak to others as well. Share This Beautiful Mess with anyone you feel may appreciate it.
Until next time,
NK
P.S. Don’t forget to follow Messy Mind and our writers!
