I’ve Been Sober for 3 Months! Here’s What I’ve Learnt
Journey to Sobriety
Last October, I decided to embark on a journey of sobriety. For a month, I did not drink alcohol.
I shared my learnings in my previous article. Three months on, I wanted to write about my progress.
1. I Can Still Do Everything I like to do… but Sober!
One month in, I wanted to stay in bed and not go anywhere. But now, I realise I can still do all the activities I love without needing to have a couple of pints. I go to bars and club events and still enjoy myself. If I’m having a good time, then it is a great event.
I found that a lot of times I would use alcohol to make situations better. Feeling bored? Buy a drink. Not feeling the vibe? Neck a couple of shots. I was using drinking to cope better in environments that I did not need to be in.
Now, if I’m not enjoying myself, I go home. There is no shame in leaving an event early if it’s not for you. You don’t owe anyone your time and energy.
2. I’m Still Longing For That Feeling
I don’t regret my sobriety. Nonetheless, I still want to ‘let loose’; to drop my inhibitions and not have any care in the world. To really ‘let go’.
I had to examine where this desire came from. It always goes back to “Am I comfortable in who I am?”.
Somehow, I equate being the life of the party with getting drunk. I need to remind myself that I’m not ‘boring’ if I’m being myself. Moments, where I’m not a white girl wasted, are still valuable.
For example, I spent New Year's with some of my closest friends. We were play card games, talked about Star Wars and had late-night takeout together. I will always cherish it, especially because I was sober enough to remember.
3. I Do Not Know How To Cope with Stress
Thursdays are for Work Drinks. In my office, once you’re done at 5:30 pm (or even earlier if you’re cheeky), you can go downstairs and have a glass of wine or two. And that glass is needed after a stressful day.
But, what do you do when cannot rely on alcohol as a de-stressor?
When I’m stressed, I hold tension in my body with no relief. I have work constantly on my mind, reminding myself of what I have to do the next day.
Over time, it can take a toll.
It’s so easy to look to alcohol, drugs, food and other commodities to make us feel better or to numb us. Fortunately, I am looking at better coping mechanisms; writing, yoga and watching a really good film or TV show. Allowing myself to rest is also key in relieving stress.
4. I Get Tired
I’m not a first-year university student anymore; I can’t stay out until the early morning. After midnight, I’m ready for my bed.
Maybe it’s because I’m getting older, but since alcohol doesn’t keep me going, I get tired more quickly. I found it annoying because if it's a good event, I love sticking it out until the end.
However, one of my friends asked me: “Why do you want to stay until the end?”
Again, I’m not boring if I want to go home at a reasonable hour and get a good night’s sleep; I am doing what’s best for me.
Will I go back to drinking? Not anytime soon. Let’s see how I feel in the next three months!
