I’m a Life Lessons Junkie
Life lessons are available everywhere — if you stop to look
I lived most of my life stuck to my flawed ways.
I knew it is human to err but believed I could make no mistake.
I knew feedback is crucial yet wanted people to praise all my actions.
I knew I was responsible for my life yet I was happy clinging on to my parents and other well-wishers.
I knew anger was bad yet did nothing to become a calmer person.
In 2014, I decided to take steps to change my flawed ways. My entire being refused to cooperate — staying flawed was more comfortable — change was hard.
I decided to adopt an unusual strategy to change my flawed ways — I kept consuming positive information in the gallons. I learned Vedanta — I read non-fiction books — I watched TED talks.
Unwittingly, I became a life lessons junkie.
Life Lessons are Available Anywhere We Stop to Look
Dattatreya, the avadhootha who lived a free nomadic life without being bound to any place, had 24 gurus.
He learned patience from the earth. People burden the earth by standing and stomping on her — yet, she bears it with supreme patience and in return helps them by producing trees and crops.
He learned a lesson from a trapped pigeon family. Some baby pigeons were caught in a hunter’s trap. The mother pigeon did not want to live without her babies, she willingly went to join her children. The father pigeon followed his wife who he loved dearly. Dattatreya observed this scene and learned that attachment causes bondage.
In this way, he learned 24 lessons from 24 gurus by keeping his eyes open and observing.
We can learn life lessons from anywhere and everywhere — if we stop to look.
I Forgive Myself Liberally
I have taken several trips down the guilt spiral.
My old tendencies — especially anger — would come in unexpected and hijack me. I would wonder — “What happened to the new me that came out of the self-transformation journey?”.
I would wallow with guilt.
“I’m the worst”, my mind would be quick to remind me.
When I believe I am the worst, I give myself a hard time and I drill a hole into my confidence levels.
I have decided to go easy on myself — and forgive myself liberally.
I can’t expect the world to forgive me liberally — they will judge as is their wont. I don’t need to add to the judgment. I can be my own best friend.
I need to exercise caution, though — “forgiving myself liberally” cannot be an excuse to unleash all the negative emotions. I have to put in a good faith effort — do my best — after which if my old compulsive tendencies get the better of me, I forgive myself liberally.
Putting the Lessons in Practice — All in Good Time
We can foresee what will happen when a third-grade student tries to write a twelfth-grade exam.
Yet, we expect ourselves to pass college-level life exams when we have the emotional maturity of a kindergarten student. At least, I had these expectations of myself.
I’m learning to go easy on myself.
I’m far from perfect. While I’ve made progress in my self-transformation journey, I have my days when I relapse into my old tendencies — where anger, the complaining muscle, entitlement all rear their ugly heads.
I have accepted that I will relapse.
I tell myself that while it is not okay to get angry, it is okay to get angry, if you know what I mean.
I’m a gentler person than I was 9 years ago. If I keep putting in the work, I’ll become more gentle and graceful in the future.
I take steps to make progress, and trust the process — that it will all come together in good time.
I’m a Life-Lessons Junkie
I have a sneaking admiration for the disciplined folks who take one virtue and spend their lifetimes practicing it.
I fear not the man who has practiced 10,000 kicks once, but I fear the man who has practiced one kick 10,000 times. — Bruce Lee
I find that disciplined approach hard — at least at this point. I have chosen a different strategy to pursue self-improvement. I flood myself with life lessons, and feed it to my subconscious mind.
An internal churning takes place and something works — I find that I’m a gentler person than the past me.
One day, I hope to take Bruce Lee’s lesson to heart and practice one virtue till I become on with said virtue.
Today, though, I’m a proud life-lessons junkie.
I look out for life lessons from all corners. So much so that when I watch a movie or TV series, my brain first looks for the life lessons before my mind gets entertained.
Life lessons are available everywhere — if you pause to look.
