Why I Don’t Support Child Surrogacy
The problem with buying and selling babies
Introduction
Over the weekend, I happened to see my mother watching a documentary by American socialite Paris Hilton. Honestly, it didn’t seem all that interesting to watch a rich 40-year-old deal with her first-world problems. But there was one point watching where I had to leave the room.
Apparently, Hilton decided to have a baby with her new husband. But rather than giving birth to the boy by herself, Hilton decided to have the baby via a surrogate mother. This didn’t sit right with me at all, and here’s why.
Let me explain. I realize that surrogacy is a growing trend among mothers, especially rich mothers like Kim Kardashian. But here is the problem. Many women having surrogacies today can have children, but they simply choose not to. They don’t want to do the hard work of having a baby themselves, and I find this objectionable.
Look, I get it. Apparently, Hilton didn’t want to birth her baby herself because she was afraid of the process of childbirth. I also recognize that it’s harder for a 40-year-old woman to recover from a pregnancy than a 20-year-old woman. But that doesn’t seem convincing enough to me.
My fundamental issue with surrogacy is that it takes the natural process of childbirth and turns it into an unnatural process. God’s design for a family as that one man and one woman come together to have a baby(ies). But with a surrogate mother, a third parent is added to the equation. This is especially the case when a homosexual couple, like Dave Rubin and his “husband,” have a baby via surrogacy. The surrogate mother is taking something natural, a baby, and giving it to an unnatural union.
Now, I realize that the Bible doesn’t explicitly call surrogacy a sin. But as I’ll discuss later, I don’t think that changes the ethical issue here. As Paul writes:
“All things are lawful,” but not all things are helpful. “All things are lawful,” but not all things build up. (1 Corinthians 10:23)
As a result, we need to establish some problems here. The first is how surrogacy is disrespectful to the unborn.
Society’s disrespect for the unborn
Last week, I talked about how abortion denies the right to life for millions of unborn children. Just as a reminder, over 65 million children have been killed since Roe v. Wade was passed.
But what does this have to do with surrogacy? Well, in both circumstances there is an unnatural element added to an otherwise natural phenomenon. In the case of abortion, this involves killing a baby before he or she is born. It is a form of child sacrifice, and a particularly brazen one at that.
Likewise, surrogacy involves a mother enduring the pain of childbirth only to give her baby away to other parents. As a result, the surrogate mother often loses the legal rights to her own baby. In other words, she is at the mercy of the intended parents. She cannot keep her child, even if she eventually decides she wants to. Additionally, if the intended parents don’t like how the baby turned out, they can request for the surrogate to get an abortion.
Don’t believe me? Here’s an example of intended parents who almost bullied the surrogate into having an abortion because she didn’t conceive twins. Additionally, it’s not uncommon for the intended parents to sue the surrogate if she doesn’t want to terminate the pregnancy.
Do you not see the problem here? The practice of surrogacy, especially in its modern form, turns the beautiful act of childbearing and commodifies it. Surrogate babies, human beings, are turned into products that can be discarded at any time. Intended parents treat surrogate babies like a customer treats bad food like a restaurant.
If this reminds you of chattel slavey, that’s because surrogacy is like this practice. But unlike chattel slavery, we don’t seem to recognize surrogacy as evil. I should note here also that the people likely to support this practice tend to be progressives, which strikes me as quite odd.
When baby animals are ripped from their mothers, we are quick to cry foul. Alternatively, if we were to bring up a system akin to chattel slavery today, the outcry would be so fierce that it would cause a nation-wide riot. But when selfish parents decide to steal babies from other women? Radio silence. Where are the feminists at a time like this?
I suppose it’s not a problem to us that a surrogate mother doesn’t have legal rights to her own child. But what’s truly disturbing is how medical and inhuman surrogacy tends to be nowadays. In the past, a man conceived a baby with a surrogate mother to have a child when the original mother couldn’t conceive. But now, that’s not necessary anymore.
Nowadays, we keep children in a lab.
Gestational Carriers
See the name of that section? That’s what a surrogate mother is called in the modern version of surrogacy. Nowadays, people can have a surrogate baby via in vitro fertilization. In IVF, an embryo is created in a lab using the egg and sperm of various donors. These donors may include an intended parent or the surrogate. The embryo is then frozen for an indefinite amount of time before being carried to the uterus of the surrogate mother to begin the pregnancy.
Last year, people brought up reasonable fears that AI would take over human society. But I’m concerned that we don’t seem to think it’s bad that science has completely wrecked the process of children. Just writing that previous paragraph made me feel icky. There’s something crooked about treating babies like lab subjects. Is this really the point we’ve gotten to in society?
I should mention that this is not the same thing as adoption. In the case of adoption, a baby is born via his or her biological parents. But due to whatever reason, the parents have decided that the best way to love the child is by putting him or her up for adoption. It’s not a perfect solution, but it’s much better than having the child frozen in a lab or ripped from the mother.
Conclusion
In the interest of fairness, I must talk about the one instance where the Bible mentions surrogacy. In chapter 16 of the book of Genesis, Abraham gives birth to Ishmael through a surrogate, Hagar. This is because at the time, Abraham’s wife Sarah was unable to conceive. It seems that surrogacy was common during this time, as it was shameful to not have children.
But even this wasn’t a perfect situation. First, Ishmael was made in the image of God, of course, but he wasn’t the child the Lord promised Abraham and Sarah. Second, Hagar felt distress because she didn’t get to keep her own baby. She was so distressed, in fact, that an angel had to minister to her (Genesis 16:7–12).
My point is that regardless of the circumstance, surrogacy is the practice of an alien society. This is especially the case of in IVF. Even at the best of times, surrogacy is an ethically muddy issue.
If possible, I think we need to avoid surrogacy. There is nothing progressive or conservative about making the process of childbirth unnatural. Too often does surrogacy either give emotional pain to the surrogate mother or the baby. As a result, we ought to stick with God’s plan.
