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President Baby
Writing from Asterios Kokkinos (a.k.a. the “good” boy of comedy)
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The Fact That Hillary Secretly Murdered Dozens Shows She’s Ready To Lead
The Fact That Hillary Secretly Murdered Dozens Shows She’s Ready To Lead
As a longtime fan of both /r/The_Donald AND /r/hillaryforprison, I’m privy to exclusive knowledge about Hillary Clinton. Her secret lesbian…
Asterios Kokkinos
Oct 2, 2016
Best Names For Boats
Best Names For Boats
You’re welcome, rich people.
Asterios Kokkinos
Apr 25, 2016
You are Now Living at Mad TV
You are Now Living at Mad TV
Originally published in Paste Magazine, September ‘16
Asterios Kokkinos
Oct 2, 2016
Back End Web Programmer Familiar with Magento
Back End Web Programmer Familiar with Magento
A few years back, I saw an ad looking for a back end web programmer familiar with Magento. I responded as Scott Summers. Here’s what…
Asterios Kokkinos
May 13, 2016
A Letter to “The Breakfast Club” Explaining Why They All Failed
A Letter to “The Breakfast Club” Explaining Why They All Failed
By Principal Richard Vernon, Shermer High School
Asterios Kokkinos
Dec 27, 2015
Who Said It: Donald Trump, Or A Sentient Pile Of Garbage Named Trashnominicus?
Who Said It: Donald Trump, Or A Sentient Pile Of Garbage Named Trashnominicus?
One is a wretched creature, borne from the depths of society’s own ills…and the other is Donald Trump, a businessman. Although I guess that…
Asterios Kokkinos
Jul 24, 2015
American Appalling: Minutes from an American Apparel Board Meeting
American Appalling: Minutes from an American Apparel Board Meeting
12:05 pm — Meeting delayed due to beer not being ironic enough. “Old Milwaukee Dry” swapped out with “Schlitz Ice.” Meeting gaveled to…
Asterios Kokkinos
Dec 27, 2015
Why Is Our Newspaper Entirely Devoted To Our Paperboy?
Why Is Our Newspaper Entirely Devoted To Our Paperboy?
Dear Chief, When I took a staff job at The Daily Sun, I did it with the understanding that there’d be a few changes around here. Deeper…
Asterios Kokkinos
Oct 2, 2016
Highlights from Obama’s Gun Control Address If A Bee Had Flown In
Highlights from Obama’s Gun Control Address If A Bee Had Flown In
Last night, President Obama gave a powerful address from the Oval Office in which he tied the threat of terrorism to our national epidemic…
Asterios Kokkinos
Dec 27, 2015
Tombstone Goofs IV
Tombstone Goofs IV
Check out these classic Tombstone Goofs!
Asterios Kokkinos
Apr 25, 2016
Worf’s Honor Roll
Worf’s Honor Roll
Find out what made Worf’s famous honor roll this week!
Asterios Kokkinos
May 28, 2014
Six Things Donald Trump Could Say and Still Get Elected
Six Things Donald Trump Could Say and Still Get Elected
Originally published in Paste Magazine, August ‘16
Asterios Kokkinos
Oct 2, 2016
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