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Relationships 101
Why relationships work or don’t, how to improve them, deal with abuse, decide to stay or go, and handle breakups
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How to Set Polite Boundaries
How to Set Polite Boundaries
Love won’t last without personal boundaries. There’s an art to setting boundaries. If done in anger, complaining,or nagging, they don’t work
Darlene Lancer
Aug 28
Regretting Regrets
Regretting Regrets
Thoughts about grieving, letting go, and moving on
Darlene Lancer
Jul 18
The Downside of Assuming Responsibility
The Downside of Assuming Responsibility
Being over-responsible may be a sign of codependency. Over-responsible people enjoy their role but can become judgmental and resentful
Darlene Lancer
Jul 8
The Signs and Effect of Emotional Incest
The Signs and Effect of Emotional Incest
Emotional incest has been compared to actual incest since it similarly creates long-lasting effects on mental health and adult relationshp
Darlene Lancer
Jul 3
Hidden Truths About Relationships
Hidden Truths About Relationships
Codependents’ problems in relationships start before they begin! Because they’re blind to the truth, their behavior worsens their plight.
Darlene Lancer
Jun 27
What It’s Like to Be a Distancer
What It’s Like to Be a Distancer
Pursuer-Distancer relationships are painful and typical of codependents. Understand a distancer to not take their behavior personally.
Darlene Lancer
Apr 3
Are You Emotionally Unavailable? Read 10 Signs You Might Be
Are You Emotionally Unavailable? Read 10 Signs You Might Be
It hurts to be unable to get close to a loved one, but it may hide your own emotional unavailability. Hidden intimacy fears make it safer.
Darlene Lancer
Feb 18
The Rollercoaster of Loving an Addict or Alcoholic
The Rollercoaster of Loving an Addict or Alcoholic
In 2022, 48.7 million people had a substance use disorder. Addiction harms everyone involved. It’s painful but there is help and hope.
Darlene Lancer
Feb 9
One Common Trait that Predicts Relationship Failures
One Common Trait that Predicts Relationship Failures
Our beliefs, thoughts, feelings, and personality all impact our communicaton and relationships, but one factor can predict their longevity.
Darlene Lancer
Feb 7
The Difference Between Kindness and Codependency
The Difference Between Kindness and Codependency
Do you wonder whether you’re a kind, empathetic person or codependent? There are many differences between empathy and codependency.
Darlene Lancer
Nov 17, 2023
Dodge a Bullet: Know the Relationship Red Flags
Dodge a Bullet: Know the Relationship Red Flags
People confuse excitement and anxiety. When they’re anxious to meet someone, they think it’s a sign of chemistry and love. It might not be.
Darlene Lancer
Oct 28, 2023
What an Interdependent Relationship Looks Like
What an Interdependent Relationship Looks Like
Interdependent relationships are the healthiest. Learn what makes them work and distinguishes them from codependency and independence.
Darlene Lancer
Jul 1, 2023
Are Empaths Codependent and Vice Versa?
Are Empaths Codependent and Vice Versa?
Like an HSP–highly sensitive person, empaths are attuned to stimuli and people’s emotions. But does that make them codependent, too?
Darlene Lancer
Nov 30, 2022
Anxious Attachment and Relationship Anxiety
Anxious Attachment and Relationship Anxiety
Extreme anxiety and worry about relationship is relationship anxiety that can continue for the long term and damage a relationship.
Darlene Lancer
Nov 3, 2022
Signs of Healthy Boundaries
Signs of Healthy Boundaries
Healthy boundaries are essential in recovery from codependency. They both build and reflect self-esteem. Learn how to make them.
Darlene Lancer
Sep 30, 2022
Signs of a Codependent Addictive Relationship
Signs of a Codependent Addictive Relationship
Most of these signs stem from three things, which are core symptoms of codependency: Shame and lack of boundaries and communication skills.
Darlene Lancer
Aug 16, 2022
How to Help an Alcoholic — Addict
How to Help an Alcoholic — Addict
Though powerless over an alcoholic/addict’s ultimate behavior, we can create circumstances that influence them to get addiction treatment.
Darlene Lancer
Aug 7, 2022
Codependency Relationship Problems
Codependency Relationship Problems
Codependency causes problems in the relationship with yourself and with others. Find out how, why, and what you can do. Change is possible.
Darlene Lancer
Jul 17, 2022
The Difference Between Love and Codependency
The Difference Between Love and Codependency
Sadly, because codependents feel unworthy of love, they push love away or are with someone emotionally unavailable. Real love eludes them.
Darlene Lancer
Mar 1, 2022
How a Secure Attachment Heals
How a Secure Attachment Heals
People with anxious or avoidant attachment style paradoxically avoid secure relationships and fear what would provide healing and happiness.
Darlene Lancer
Nov 7, 2021
How Splitting Ruins Relationships
How Splitting Ruins Relationships
How can lovers feel both love and hate in the same week or even hour? Splitting helps us cope with Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde but hurts us.
Darlene Lancer
Sep 18, 2021
How Your Attachment Style Determines Your Relationship Success
How Your Attachment Style Determines Your Relationship Success
Parenting shapes our ability to be both intimate and autonomous. This impacts our relationships and their problems. But we can change.
Darlene Lancer
Sep 15, 2021
You Can’t Break Someone’s Denial
You Can’t Break Someone’s Denial
Did you ever convince someone in love with an abuser that they should leave or try to help an addict who didn’t want to quit?
Darlene Lancer
Aug 11, 2021
Does Your Relationship Drain You?
Does Your Relationship Drain You?
Ask yourself whether your relationship adds to your life. Does it nourish and support you, or do you feel drained and resentful?
Darlene Lancer
May 16, 2021
Can Your Empathy Endanger You?
Can Your Empathy Endanger You?
You may not realize your empathy — a good thing — can confuse and endanger you if you lack it for yourself. Beware. It can attract abusers.
Darlene Lancer
May 9, 2021
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