Body Mapping for Better Sex (Explained With Examples)
Try this with your partner tonight
I recently discovered body maps (AKA, pleasure maps) and they make so much sense for singles and couples.
With these pleasure maps, couples can revitalize their sexual relationships.
In this article, you’ll learn everything you need to know about body maps for better sex.
What Is A Pleasure Map?
Put simply, a pleasure map is a body map for sexual pleasure.
Body mapping is a way of externalizing our internal thoughts and feelings onto a page.
Medical professionals can use it to help locate the source of our pain or chart the progress of an injury as it heals. Therapists might have us body map as a way of exploring our relationship with our physical selves, and how that relationship changes over time.
Personally, I think body mapping is a great way to settle betting disputes (“No really, this is where I hurt when you punched me!”).
But whether you’re using it to explore your emotions or just to settle a bar-room bet, body mapping is a useful tool for understanding our relationship with our bodies.
And isn’t that what we’re all looking for in life? Increased self-awareness and the occasional two dollars?
Body mapping can also be applied to sexuality.
You and/or your partner can use the body chart to identify where you feel the most pleasure and how your partner can become the best lover of your life.
Here’s Why You Need a Pleasure Map
Body mapping is an activity that can be used to help individuals and couples understand their feelings about their bodies.
This can help to identify areas of the body that may be holding tension or negativity. By understanding these feelings, you can work through them and release them.
Body pleasure mapping can also be used to explore positive feelings and sensations.
This can help to promote body confidence and self-acceptance. Ultimately, body mapping is a powerful tool that can be used to improve emotional, physical, and sexual well-being.
Other reasons why every couple needs a body map:
- To learn more about each other
- To understand our own pleasure centers
- To help our partners give us more pleasure
- To help us please our partners even more
- To improve our sex lives
- To reduce anxiety about their body and sex
Here is a good video about how to use body mapping for any kind of anxiety, including sexual anxiety:
How To Make a Pleasure Map
Start by drawing an outline of the front and back of a body. Or, you can use a premade outline.
If you’re doing this activity as a couple, each person makes a body outline.
Once you have the outline complete, start to pinpoint where on the map you feel certain emotions. Focus on where you feel the most pleasure and (if applicable) any other strong emotions such as shame, pride, loss, disgust, or pain.
It’s nearly impossible to grow up without any body issues.
You can use different colors to code different emotions or simply write them out next to the appropriate body part.
Try to be as specific as possible in identifying your emotions and the intensity of those emotions. The more specific you are, the more insights you are likely to gain from the activity.
Body mapping can be an extremely helpful way to explore your feelings about your body and gain greater self-awareness.
Pleasure Map Activity for Couples
For this activity, you’re going to need writing utensils and paper.
You may also want to use a premade body map (you can Google it and look in the Images search to find one). Don’t forget about colored pencils or markers.
They can make the entire activity more colorful, insightful, and fun.
I also recommend a quiet, uncluttered space free of distracting noise. If you enjoy music, keep it soft and mellow in the background.
Give yourself and your partner enough time so that the activity is not rushed.
If you want, you can use a color code:
- Green for GO (This is where you loved to be touched)
- Yellow for MAYBE (This is where you like to be touched sometimes but not every time)
- Red for STOP (This is where you never like to be touched or you don’t like to be touched in certain ways)
After completing the pleasure maps, step back and look at them in completion. Share them with your partner and talk about what your colors mean.
Walk each other through each pleasure center, explaining how much pleasure you get from that area and how you like to be touched there. Show your partner exactly what you mean by demonstrating how you like to be pleased there.
Repeat for every pleasure center on both body maps.
Also, talk about areas where painful emotions dominate and help your partner understand how you feel and why you feel those strong emotions about your body.
As you talk and listen, be gentle and loving with each other.
Don’t judge, accuse, blame, or belittle yourself or your partner. This is an activity of love and pleasure.
Body Mapping Tips
In a perfect world, our body maps would all glow bright neon green.
But most of us have some areas where we feel more pleasure, maybe some pain, and those colors can change at different times in our lives.
The important thing is to understand ourselves and help our partners please us (and for them to help us please them). There is no right or wrong body map.
We are all different.
Likewise, our body maps might shift over the course of time. During a woman’s menstrual cycle, for example, she may not want to be touched in sensitive areas like her breasts or vagina.
Then again, some women do want to be touched (in particular ways).
It’s helpful to explain these nuances to your partner and don’t expect them to instantly remember everything and become an expert on your body in a few minutes.
It takes time, practice, and repetition.
When going through your body map, don’t forget about your lips, mouth, and brain.
A final tip: Redo the body map exercise every year and after major milestones, such as pregnancy, childbirth, surgery, and marriage.
Body Mapping Examples for Couples
Consider these body mapping examples:
- Tony likes his nipples rubbed and sucked but feels shame at expressing this desire.
- Sara doesn’t feel much of anything when her breasts are kissed or caressed. It’s nice but nothing spectacular for her. She’d rather feel penetration.
- Mike loves to receive blowjobs every day and to finish in his partner’s mouth.
- Tiffany thinks waking up to her partner going down on her is the hottest thing ever.
- James doesn’t feel much pleasure when he’s really deep in his partner (and not moving in and out). He likes when his partner is on top but doesn’t feel much physical pleasure from it (but he does enjoy it and it gives him a much-needed rest during sex).
- Alexandra doesn’t like to be fingered but she does like her clit gently sucked.
Final Thoughts
Give yourself and your partner the freedom to adapt and change what they want and how they feel.
No one is locked into pleasure in any specific way.
Human beings are dynamic creatures who constantly evolve. The best sex happens in the context of freedom, acceptance, and celebration of each other.
Related posts:
- 7 Weirdest Things Your Penis Can Do
- Dick Discipline: Your Ultimate Guide
- Every Couple Needs a Sex Blanket
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