I’m not a heavy drinker, I can sometimes go for hours without touching a drop. — Noel Coward
I drink too much. The last time I gave a urine sample it had an olive in it. — Rodney Dangerfield
Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy. — Benjamin Franklin
Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy. — Benjamin Franklin
Whiskey is by far the most popular of all remedies that won’t cure a cold. — Jerry…
Time is never wasted when you’re wasted all the time. — Catherine Zandonella
Age is just a number. It’s totally irrelevant unless, of course, you happen to be a bottle of wine…
One martini is all right. Two are too many, and three are not enough. — James Thurber
The light music of whiskey falling into a glass — an agreeable interlude. — James Joyce
I find alcohol to be the most appropriate means to diminish the effects of a moral hangover…