7 Subtle Mind Shifts That Will Reshape Your Leadership Potential
The basics, plus more
The challenge was there. For some reason I took it. I think it was peer pressure. Or maybe I had nothing to lose in saying yes.
Maybe it was time to cut the ropes and break away from my shy, introverted, acne-ridden self that I’d become so used to over the past 19 years.
Maybe it was time for me to learn what it means to be a leader.
It was the summer of 2012, and I’d just received a text message from a friend-of-a-friend, who after introducing himself, asked if I was interested in hearing about his idea: to build a new university society that would promote leadership skills on campus.
And for some reason, he was wondering if I’d be willing to lead this venture, which we later named ‘Young Leaders’. (Cute, right?)
And so, with little experience under my belt, I embarked on a journey that would go on to reshape my entire being. And what followed was some of the greatest lessons around leadership that I could ever have asked for, all due to this slightly random invitation.
What I’m about to share with you isn’t based on well-known theories. It’s based on my own experiences of doing some things right, a lot of things wrong, and importantly learning some powerful lessons along the way.
As President John F. Kennedy once said,
“Leadership and learning are indispensable to each other.”
With that in mind, let’s get straight to it.
1. Responsibility Is a Necessity for Every Leader
Any leader that thinks they can delegate their way out of every task, or that they can rely on their team to navigate through challenging times without doing anything themselves, is well, delusional.
If you want to earn the respect of your followers, you have to demonstrate why they should respect you. And the best way to do so is to show up. Every. Single. Day.
As Winston Churchill so aptly said,
“The price of greatness is responsibility.”
If you want to be a great leader, you have to embrace the responsibility that comes with sitting at the top of the mountain.
Don’t sit around doing nothing, waiting for your team to show results. Take action. Respect the role you’re in by working hard at doing it better.
And never, ever blame others for the things you should have done yourself. If you have a tendency to do so, think about this for a second:
“When a man points a finger at someone else, he should remember that four of his fingers are pointing at himself.” — Louis Nizer
Lesson #1: Take responsibility for your role and your actions. It’s how the best leaders earn the respect of their followers.
2. Your Vision Is NOT the Be-All and End-All
Good leaders know how to inspire. Great leaders know how to motivate.
The difference between inspiring others and motivating them is subtle, and yet, the effects are so profoundly different.
I learnt this lesson the hard way.
As President, I desperately wanted our society to support a charitable cause. I knew which cause mattered most to me. And in making this “executive” decision, I practically ignored the cause that mattered most to the person actually in charge with the charity side-of-things.
I made it harder to motivate this person, and there was nobody to blame for the mediocre results that followed but myself.
President Dwight Eisenhower said it best,
“Leadership is the art of getting someone else to do something you want done because he wants to do it.”
Never stay rigid on your vision. Flex it once in a while. Give your team a large enough slice of the pie so that they too stay motivated, so that they too feel like they’re accomplishing something awesome.
Lesson #2: Instead of getting your cohort behind your vision, focus on bringing them alongside your vision. Motivate, don’t just inspire.
3. There’s No Hiding Behind Your Failures
The hardest part about being a leader is dealing with the moments you trip up. Why? Because everyone, yes everyone, will be watching.
There’s no pinpointing the blame on others. There’s no running away from a tough situation to shed a tear in private. You’ve got an audience to address. You have a team that needs to hear from you, a fanbase that wants to know that it’s not over.
Not only do you have to pick yourself up in these moments, but you have to pick your team up too. Such a skill is reserved for the great.
Every leader is fully aware that the sinking feeling of failure is quadrupled by the publicity that comes with it. But great leaders use this to their advantage, as we shall see next.
Lesson #3: You cannot hide behind your failures. Only once you accept this, and embrace this fact, will you be able to call yourself a ‘leader’.
4. Conviction Is the Key to Wise Risk-Taking
So how do great leaders balance the risks of failing with the need to make good decisions? How do they overcome the inherent fear of getting things wrong and failing publicly?
It’s simple.
They make decisions that are based on conviction.
You can’t get around the risk that comes with every decision you make. You simply can’t be right all the time.
But what you can do is get most things right, most of the time.
And the best way to do that is to take calculated risks.
Every leader is an active decision-maker, but the best ones, well, they’re both courageous and calculated in their approach. They know what they’re up against and they’re ready to take action because they’ve assessed all the options until they’ve arrived at a state of conviction.
Maxwell Maltz said it best,
“Often the difference between a successful man and a failure is not one’s better abilities or ideas, but the courage that one has to bet on his ideas, to take a calculated risk, and to act.”
Lesson #4: Make better decisions by taking calculated risks that are underpinned by conviction.
5. It’s an Active Listener That Achieves the Best Outcome
So how do leaders make tough decisions? How do they find conviction in what they do?
Well, for starters, they welcome other people’s opinions. And they actively listen to them.
They aren’t caught in up their own world, in their own sense of awesomeness, whilst in the middle of a conversation. They’re taking mental notes of what the other person has said, and wondering how best to take this onboard.
Stephen R. Covey said it best,
“Most people do not listen with the intent to understand; they listen with the intent to reply.”
Great leaders appreciate this distinction. It’s how they account for the views of the majority. It’s how they make decisions that generate lasting impact.
Lesson #5: Actively listen to your team. It will serve you well when it comes to making tough decisions.
6. Never Shy Away From Those Who Disagree With You
Over the years, I’ve seen those in a position of power “lead” by sourcing a team who’ll always say “yes”. They’ll surround themselves with people of a like-minded nature, those who’ll always agree with them, in every situation.
If you want to be a leader that makes good decisions, you have to ensure you’ve listened to everything you need to know. Simply, you have to actively look for the views that are different from yours.
“What we see depends mainly on what we look for.” ― John Lubbock
Seek the opinions of those who disagree with you. The aim is to cover your blind spots. It’s by far the best way to test the strength of your underlying conviction.
And yes, while it might feel uncomfortable in the short-run, it will be highly advantageous over the long-run.
Lesson #6: Embrace diverse opinions. Find those that disagree with you. Test your level of conviction.
7. Know When to Step Down and Engage With Your Followers
One of the best decisions I made whilst at university, was the time I decided to mentally “step down” from my position as a co-choreographer and “join” my dancing crew, literally a week before our upcoming, annual show.
It wasn’t because I was bad at choreography, it was because my dancers simply wanted to enjoy the process. They didn’t want to be pushed to perfection. They didn’t care what the end result looked like. And their view needed to be heard, and felt by us choreographers.
Sometimes, the best way to lead, is to step down from your pedestal, and engage with the people that matter most.
“I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” — Maya Angelou
Never let your leadership position cloud your judgement. Never allow your title as a ‘leader’ to boost or taint your ego.
Engage with your team on a regular basis. Share a side of you that lets them know you too, are human. Find ways to relate to them. Let them know you’re there for them if need be. And importantly, remind them how you’re all in this together.
After all, you can’t be a leader if you’ve got nobody left to lead.
Lesson #7: And finally, lead through engagement, not through your ego.
