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The Daily H
The Daily H is a place for my somewhat-skewed always-nude totally-stewed stimulant-fueled writing. Short humor, rambling essay, blurbs of misadventure, ridiculous pictures, and some other shit.
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Creatures of the Wild — The San Antonio Driver
Creatures of the Wild — The San Antonio Driver
Part II: Exploring the Diverse Subspecies
Heath ዟ
Jan 7, 2020
Travel Tips for Idiots: Keep the GPS On
Travel Tips for Idiots: Keep the GPS On
I recently got a spam email from thediscoverer.com promoting an article with the title Why You Should Turn Off the GPS When You Travel.
Heath ዟ
Oct 2, 2019
Ode to an Egomaniac
Ode to an Egomaniac
I’m glad to know my words hit their mark. It’s gratifying, the validation you gift me through your infantile reaction.
Heath ዟ
Jun 25, 2019
Dear Ignorant Sluts,
Dear Ignorant Sluts,
I love you.
Heath ዟ
Dec 4, 2016
High Flying Kung Fu Fighting Murder Machine
High Flying Kung Fu Fighting Murder Machine
You were virtually guaranteed someone’s blue jean ball-sack bulge mashed against your face, buffed about like exfoliating sponge, oxygen…
Heath ዟ
Aug 3, 2018
A Quick Trip on the Body Odor Railroad
A Quick Trip on the Body Odor Railroad
A bit funkier than usual, but richly odiferous.
Heath ዟ
Aug 3, 2017
An Open Letter to ‘Natural’ Peanutbutter
An Open Letter to ‘Natural’ Peanutbutter
Dear Jar of murky oil and peanut concrete,
Heath ዟ
Mar 13, 2018
Dear Coffee — IV
Dear Coffee — IV
Holy hell, it’s Monday…
Heath ዟ
Feb 20, 2017
I Should Have Stayed in Bed
I Should Have Stayed in Bed
Some mornings… ugh… some mornings just take one look at the coffee and reach for the vodka instead.
Heath ዟ
Sep 19, 2017
An Unfortunate Roadtrip
An Unfortunate Roadtrip
“Pull over, I got a coobee,” Jeff said suddenly from the passenger’s seat.
Heath ዟ
May 30, 2019
Why Most People Won’t Benefit from “Why Most People…/How to…” Articles
Why Most People Won’t Benefit from “Why Most People…/How to…” Articles
*Spoiler Alert* It’s the same reason eating at McDonald’s doesn‘t benefit your health
Heath ዟ
Apr 29, 2019
A Visit to the Doctor
A Visit to the Doctor
“Hi, Mr. <…we’ll go with ‘Smith’>, my name is Amy, I’m a nurse practitioner. I’ll go over some things with you, and Dr. Callas will be…
Heath ዟ
Apr 29, 2019
Mr. Spider and My (mostly) Irrational Fear of Arachnids
Mr. Spider and My (mostly) Irrational Fear of Arachnids
It may very well be Ms. Spider. I’m not going to check. I hate spiders.
Heath ዟ
Apr 2, 2019
Online Dating 👎
Online Dating 👎
<Insert Raspberry Sound Here>
Heath ዟ
Mar 18, 2019
An Ode to My Big Sister
An Ode to My Big Sister
I missed her birthday.
Heath ዟ
Mar 7, 2019
Dear Coffee — VII
Dear Coffee — VII
it must be da wakey-wakey time!
Heath ዟ
Jan 28, 2019
Closure is Only a Realization Away — 2018 NaNoWriMo excerpt
Closure is Only a Realization Away — 2018 NaNoWriMo excerpt
[Click for Soundtrack]
Heath ዟ
Dec 7, 2018
NaNoWriMo 2018
NaNoWriMo 2018
Well, another one has come… and almost gone.
Heath ዟ
Nov 30, 2018
Dear Coffee VI
Dear Coffee VI
A Love Letter
Heath ዟ
Nov 1, 2018
Relationship Villains — ‘Bad Guys’ in Denial
Relationship Villains — ‘Bad Guys’ in Denial
[Note: The use of the term ‘Bad Guy’ in this piece does not indicate gender. It is used in a neutral sense.]
Heath ዟ
Oct 29, 2018
If I Didn’t Have a Heart
If I Didn’t Have a Heart
to the tune of “If I Only Had a Heart”
Heath ዟ
Oct 1, 2018
Transactions with the Idiot Bank
Transactions with the Idiot Bank
There’s an important early date safeguard to observe. I like to call it the Idiot Bank.
Heath ዟ
Aug 22, 2018
Coffee Date, Dinner Date, or Run Like Hell?
Coffee Date, Dinner Date, or Run Like Hell?
It seems to me going straight for a dinner date early on puts undue pressure on the conversation, while talking over coffee seems to work…
Heath ዟ
Aug 21, 2018
Dear Coffee
Dear Coffee
A Journal of Bean-Induced Madness
Heath ዟ
Aug 17, 2018
Dear Coffee — V
Dear Coffee — V
On the event horizon of the caffeine singularity, and hanging on by a finger... yeah, THAT finger, bitches
Heath ዟ
Aug 14, 2018
Drunken Haiku
Drunken Haiku
A Friday Night in Austin, TX
Heath ዟ
Jul 28, 2018
Tea Time With Heath
Tea Time With Heath
#6 — Ophelia and the perils of Falling in Love
Heath ዟ
Apr 23, 2018
Tea Time With Heath
Tea Time With Heath
#5 — You Write the Words that Make the Whole World Schwing!
Heath ዟ
Apr 6, 2018
#4 — I’m a guy. You’re hot. Wanna hook up?
#4 — I’m a guy. You’re hot. Wanna hook up?
with Yunnan black tea
Heath ዟ
Mar 20, 2018
Every Wondered What a Recording Session Sounds Like?
Every Wondered What a Recording Session Sounds Like?
It sounds kind of like this:
Heath ዟ
Mar 12, 2018
“Destined to become a classic!”
“Destined to become a classic!”
— Rolling Stone Magazine
Heath ዟ
Feb 2, 2018
NaNoWriMo 2017 Starts Today
NaNoWriMo 2017 Starts Today
and I feel fine…
Heath ዟ
Nov 1, 2017
The Sound of One Hand Clapping
The Sound of One Hand Clapping
I have discovered the answer… wait… shit. I guess I didn’t.
Heath ዟ
Oct 24, 2017
Just Say ‘No’ to Max Pixel
Just Say ‘No’ to Max Pixel
maxpixel.freegreatpicture.com
Heath ዟ
Oct 16, 2017
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