New tricks, new neural pathways
Can’t teach an old dog new tricks… so good thing we’re not dogs.
In our previous installment of The Schrodinger’s Cat Sarah Karp explored The paradox of resolutions where we briefly touched on the notion of neural plasticity and how hormones drive our behavior. Read on to learn more about how our brains are designed and what that means for us.
Have you ever wondered why people give up on new habits in no time? It’s not that they don’t want to change, it’s just that our brains are not designed for change. Instead our brains are designed for survival, which basically means repeating behaviors that keep us alive. We are hard-wired by our hormones and we don’t even know how or why that is happening. So it’s no wonder that changing habits might seem like an enormous task. It isn’t though, it’s juts your brain playing tricks on you.
You CAN design a new habit and write it into your neurons, nerve cells that send messages all over your body that allow you to do everything. You don’t need much time or money to build a new neural pathway, connections between your neurons. You need courage and focus, because it’s essential to repeat new behaviors whether or not it feels good, if they’re to become habits.
This is the magic of neural plasticity of the human brain. When a behavior is performed, the connections between neurons change with the frequency of the behavior performed. These neural pathways are like grooves in the road maps of our brain — the more you repeat a new behavior, the stronger the connection becomes.
A glimpse into a brain
Let’s start with the basics of how our brains work, so we can understand how to get it to work for us.
Your brain consists of a reptilian brain, a limbic system and a cortex [1].
- Your reptilian brain is the oldest part of the brain and controls vital functions like heart rate and breathing
- Your limbic system is a complex set of brain structures that regulates behavior, emotion, and motivation. It automatically detects danger and is responsible for your survival. The Limbic system also manages the production and release of neurochemicals that strengthen the neural pathways (dopamine, serotonin, oxytocin, endorphins)
- Your cortex is responsible for many essential brain functions like memory, learning, reasoning, problem-solving, consciousness, and sensory functioning. Here is where all our life experiences are stored in the form of neurons and neural pathways. Your cortex looks for patterns in the present that match patterns from the past
All of these complicated systems are working together to keep you alive by sending messages through your neurons and the release of neurochemicals that drive your behavior.
Thanks to reasoning and critical thinking, you are able to override your cortex-driven reactions and choose how your limbic system responds to stimuli. Otherwise, no-one would ever be flying on planes since our reptilian brain knows all too well that we can’t fly. And yet, instead of being paralyzed by the animal fear, we book our next flight without a second thought.
Neurochemicals and neural pathways, aka your habits
Let’s take a closer look at how our brain creates neural pathways.
All of your actions, reactions and behavioral patterns that are written into your neural pathways are fueled by four neurochemicals:
- Dopamine produces the feeling of joy from finding things that meet your needs, and motivates you to persevere, even when your goal requires effort
- Endorphins are natural opioids produced by our bodies that can mask pain, so you can escape from harm when you’re injured
- Oxytocin produces the feeling of being safe with others, which we call bonding, and motivates you to trust and find safety in companionship
- Serotonin produces the prideful feeling of being respected by others. Serotonin motivates you to get respect, which expands your mating opportunities and protects your offspring
These are the happy hormones. They make us feel good and naturally we look for ways to get more of these — we constantly look for love, connection, social recognition. So we create strategies in our lives to trigger the release of these hormones, but these strategies aren’t always good for us in the long run. When you chose ice cream instead of sticking to your planned healthy snack, you experience a short release of dopamine. The more you do it, the stronger the action-reaction connection in your brain gets. Remember those movie scenes where a heroine is eating a bucket of ice-cream after a break up? That’s the not-so-good yet very strong neural pathway in action.
The more often two neurons fire together (action-reaction), the stronger the wiring between neurons become.
Animals live by their impulses and instincts, they make survival decisions with very little cortex. Their limbic systems are enough to decide what’s good for them. And we have ALSO inherited a brain that is focused on survival, even though the context of our lives have changed drastically from when we were trying to not get eaten by a lion. The thing is that these reactions are not hard-wired.
We are born to wire ourselves from life experiences, and by the time we’re seven years old, our core neural pathways are built, and persist into adulthood.
Do you see the problem here? As an adult, you’re acting based on signals from the neural pathways of a toddler. Sure, it was easy to throw a tantrum when your mom wouldn’t buy you a toy, but in your 30s, that same tantrum isn’t likely to get you that promotion.
The good news is you can change that by becoming aware of your reactions (e.g. first thoughts, emotional response, behavioral patterns), going through self-reflection, acknowledging these and taking deliberate focused actions to change this neural pathway. It’s not going to feel good, and growing up is hard work, but we all know that if we want to achieve new results, it’s crazy to keep repeating the old actions.
This is all great, but what does that actually mean?
There are many theories about how long it takes to form a new habit: 28 days, 45 days. But, it takes as long as it takes. You might form a habit that’s easier for you, like choosing water over soda, in a month. On the other hand, working out consistently might take a year of consciously creating time and space for the gym, yoga or working out at home. You should keep in mind that it’s waaayyyy easier to fall into an old habit under stress since that neural pathway was created a long time ago and is frequently used. It’s more ‘sticky’.
Think of a highway (your old habit) versus starting the construction of a new road in some overgrown rural area (your new habit). You have to clear the area of trees, grass, extra ground; bring in construction workers, start laying the levels of materials, you have to keep an eye on all of that for it to keep going. This is not a quick process, and you have to be committed to the change you’re seeking to make. The moment you give up or get distracted, all the construction work will be overtaken by nature. Just like in all the post-apocalyptic movies where there’s almost nothing left of human creation.
Don’t get discouraged. If you’re reading this, I believe in you, and so should you.
Ready? Steady. Go!
Start by identifying an aspect of your life that you want to change and take a close look at what’s in the way. What stories are you telling yourself so you don’t have to change? What’s triggering the bad habit and what is your first response? Certain life situations, certain emotions (e.g. when you feel tired, instead of taking the time to unwind in a quiet, comfortable space, you use alcohol to relax; when you’re stressed, you eat junk food or don’t eat at all). Become aware of both triggers and reactions, and open your mind to see that it’s not serving you. This is not where you scold yourself, this is where you acknowledge your weakness in a kind and loving way and take it as a lesson that allows you to grow and become better. This is how you start creating a new habit.
There are a couple of tricks that might help you along the way:
- You just keep at it (duh). Especially when you don’t feel like it — that’s when your reptile brain is at its strongest. But every time you get over the “I don’t feel like it, maybe not today” feeling, you form a new neural pathway and your brain releases dopamine. You’ve probably heard the old “you’ll feel better after” saying, and you actually will on both physical and emotional levels because it’s true on the chemical level.
- Start with something small: if it’s a workout, commit to 20 min every day of activity (e.g. yoga, pilates, walking, gym, etc.); if it’s writing, start with writing a paragraph every day. The point is when you start with an intention of grand new habit (e.g. running 10 miles every day) and the last time you went for a mile walk was pre-COVID, this would be an unrealistic and overwhelming goal that your brain will immediately rebel against. We don’t want that. We definitely don’t need to spiral into self-loathing “because we’re weak, undisciplined” and whatever lies your inner critic might be whispering into your ear. That’s only your psyche misinterpreting change as danger.
When I was doing this exercise, I committed to 45 days of writing in the self-reflection diary. While that specific habit didn’t stick with me, I noticed that writing in general became easier in other aspects of my life — at work, on my social media, and here on Medium. The thing is, you don’t have to confine yourself within this self-defined new habit. You can change it and evolve with it, add new dimensions or abandon it for a better habit altogether. Why? Well, because you’re the sole creator of your life, so create something better!
The Schrödinger’s Cat is a newsletter by Irina Povolotckaia and Sarah Karp. Subscribe to get a mix of personal stories, interviews with experts, and practical coaching tips delivered straight to your inbox.
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[1] Habits of a Happy Brain: Retrain Your Brain to Boost Your Serotonin, Dopamine, Oxytocin, & Endorphin Levels by Loretta Graziano Breuning, PhD